i dont know how to feel
i dont know what to do
i dont know your face even
though i thought i knew you.

i am choking on smoke
we are equally broke
and now i am divided in two.

what if i loved you a little bit more?
if I blocked all ways in
but gave you key to main door;
what if my heart beat a little bit faster?
would i slow down the time
'fore inadvertent disaster?

What if my hand was a bit closer to yours
what if my ships came to your abandoned shores;
what if i travelled every day hundred miles
through the mountains and oceans
passing cages with lions;
would you love me a little,
would you love me some more?
if i broke all my bones
would you love me at all?

you are my paper-cut
wound that wont heal;
you are the water in my lungs
my Achilles' heel.

around my neck- tight noose;
my quiet self abuse;
my lucid dream-
my silent scream;
and faulty safety fuse.

If I could have a different face
Spend days and nights at different pace
if only I could change my features,
Lines and curves;
Not treat what I was given like a curse
If I might just believe there is someone
For everyone;
There is a second missing piece to shattered souls
If I could have a different personality
And be less goofy, better not at all...

I would be happy.

you're not enough
i hear them say
they call my bluff
pronounce insane.
you're not enough
i sense them think
i see through their eyes
even at fastest blink.
you're not enough
and your voice's not a song
no one ever asked me
need i a "sing-along"?

sometimes it's healthy to just sit in silence
focus on your body and your thoughts
notice sounds around you when no body
is tearing you apart or holding you by throat.

I love my heart to the bone
Awaking my sadness
To it's dying song.

I cry my eyes to the skull
So much so even when I am joyous
My smile is dull.

I walk my feet till they bleed;
Water and cherish ache
And all it seeds;

I loved my heart to the core
To the back of my spine
Digging wounds always sore;
And I'll never stop cradling the faith
One day you will love me til death..