Today i've lost my friend again for umpteenth time.
Since we fell out i've been losing her daily
i would wake up and lose her in my mind
repeating words and wishing life was fair, see

Today ive lost my friend and so will do tomorrow
it hurts, it has for the last year, my pain my sorrow
today i spoke to her again like year ago
today she let me down i let her go

tomorrow we will speak again and she will sound cold hearted
tomorrow she wont care that our ways parted
and i will still be feeling guilty, empty
and i will still suffer from  loneliness so hefty.

I don't know what it is that makes me love you
What makes the skies seem clear only above you
And. I know we live miles away, and pages
Thousands of words away, and worlds and dreams and stages.

I wish to meet the real you and be loved
For what I am for what I stand
Be taken;
For what you are, for what it's worth
For maybe we could be happy together
Be forsaken.

I'm not the one you tried and changed the world for
I'm not the one you saved, you cherished, loved
But hoping one day I can meet the real you
You ll save me from my life for what it's worth.

i'll build a bridge and you'll cross over
And when it rains- i'll be your cover.
I'll build a house and hide you in it
and when there's pain - i'll be your limit.

all i need is a bit inspiration
but where do i find one when i look?
i source rhymes from my lone desperation
i look for what you left and what took.
on my plate there is little of hopeful
there is not much of happy or full.
there is plenty of lonely,, deceitful
i cant tell when i stopped being a fool.
all i need is a bit self destruction
and i only achieve such by trying
to love myself without no distractions
i succeed when i rot and lie crying.
Push yourself over limit and failure
get back on your feet, if needed - knees.
Brush and shake off the horrible feeling
like you're nothing, inspire and breathe.
I think i have found my inspiration
finally i know what i want to say
let out all so long bottled frustration
aim to give, there is nothing to gain.

this is a very lonely world
we're born alone and  lone we're learnt
we're bred alone
alone we live
we search alone
the ground beneath.
alone we pray, alone believe
alone we stay alone we leave.
a single person you and i
one match, one candle, single eye.
this is a very lonely world
for those who hope to say right words
we grow old lonely
in the aftermath
we are still single soldiers
walking different paths.

your friends wont remember
your name in a day
your parents will live on
a niddle in stock of hay.

come hold my hand
i think
come accidentally touch
my arm
i hope.
Stand near
i pray so i can feel your warmth
come close
i cry and call
come close.
Admire from afar
I hope you are.
Think of me before sleep
then dream so deep.
i think.
"Come close
i call
come stand right next to me
so i can feel your warmth"
i hope you think.
Be dismal, be dejected, feel refused.
Call me when slumbering not by my name
but call your muse.
Feel hopeless but feel fearless
spread your wings
but be so shy around me, trembling knees.
I think
come hold my hand
i hope
stand near, stand close.
dont talk just be there
by chance touch my arm
at last be caught up in the nets of my blunt charm.
i think
i am not worthy of your glance, your smile
i hope
maybe  my thoughts will turn out to be true...?
denial.

he takes off her coat and hangs near the mirror
Gently whipers don't worry my dear
It won't hurt.
He takes off her jacket undoing her shirt
If you could read her mind you wouldnt learn what she slurred
In the desperate moment
When noone dares to look
She is scared as a rabbit
That's just been caught by a Wolf
Not the first time she trembles
But first time feels ashamed
Not the first time shes kissing
First time her thoughts are hissing
Like white noise in her head.