I cannot settle
I must constantly
question the situation
wondering how long it will last
how long before my parents
find out I’m a poet
find out I’m not straight
how long will I have this website
or will it disappear too

My breath is stale
my eyes weary
but my brain turns
in sync with my stomach
my mind make a list
of things I need to do
I need to apologize to that person
I hurt two years ago
I need to come out to my mom
(and society, maybe)
I need to tell that teacher I’m sorry
I need to sleep
but I can’t
and I won’t
be I’m just weak

Sometimes there are
so many words
I put my pen to paper
and they don’t stop
my brain is screaming
for sleep
yet my mind is too busy
words are swirling
forming sentences
and sometimes paragraphs
of words

My generation
will walk on
shattered glass of the past
without flinching
because we’ve been taught
it’s the norm
we’re all lost
because the path was
broken before we came

Clouds are swirling
and trees sway
clouded heart
and confused brain
but yet I’m not really in pain
because it all feels the same