What will you do if you become the person you never wanted to be???

You have never seen the darker side of the moon..
You have only seen what I have let you  see...
You think you know me?
Oh poor boy, how do I break your phantasm?
You only know what I have let you know..
The truth is overshadowed..
I have sugarcoated my personality for you..
You think I deserve only reverence and admiration
But you are unaware of the nights I spent crying of guilt...
There are some deeds I have done that I m not proud of..
And maybe I dont want you to know..
Because if you know,
Things will be different...
You take me as an untroubled girl full of compassion..
But sometimes I wanna be emotionless...
You only think you know the real me
And perhaps I want  you to keep believing this lie
Because if you know the real me
You will leave me......

"Hey, Can we talk?"
A text popped in my phone
And I was surprised, not in a good way

3am, my bestfriend..
She certainly knows me in my most unadulterated form...
My anxieties, my fears, my frustrations...
3am, my bestfriend...
She is really good at keeping secrets..
For when I wake up in the morning, no body knows a thing
3am, my bestfriend
She sure is a good listener..
Listens to my sobbing, when I stuff cloth in my mouth to make sure I dont make any sound...
3am, my bestfriend
She is also a good counselor
Consoles me till my.heart is empty, till my eyes are dry...
3am, my bestfriend
I dont doubt her loyalty
I know she ll be there for me, every time the soul in me cries for help

I write everytime you cross my mind
I write everytime I miss you
I write everytime I cant talk to you
I write everytime I want to forget you
I write everytime I want to let go of you
I wonder if I ll ever stop writing