I shouldn't be alone
In a place as Beautiful
As this

There should be no tears shed
In paradise

You're not my sunshine
You're my candle
I don't want to share your light
As you lead me out of the dark

My greatest enemy-
      Has always been myself

No other demon could-
      Smile so sweetly

Not even the Devil would-
      Laugh so openly

I hear you
You speak in nascent flowers
But breathe out raw sewage
Your to tongue writhes with lies
While your heart suffocates
Soon silence will be left to flourish
Then my ears will no longer bleed
When I have to hear you

Today the little birdie screamed out and told me
I was worth saving
*We're all worth saving

Once again
She sleeps with the monster she created
Knowing full well in the morning
He will have left with the moon
For what he feels for her
Is only what she wants to see in him

Maybe he took too much
More than he deserved
Little gaps in my heart
Filled for just the tiniest moments
He took it from me
All the loniness
Maybe then replace it,
Even by no fault of his own,
With the emptiness

I would rip out your eyes
If it meant I never had to look deep into them
And trick myself back into falling in love
Looking so deep
I become a time traveler
Going to the times when we were perfect
Like all other travelers before me
I know I can't stay in the past

Here I am
Naked in this bed
Alone
Feeling empty
Or is it the bed...
Who is empty
I don't know.
I stopped thinking
Too much about anything
After the clock on the wall
Began laughing at me.
I mean,
What time is it even?
How many hours have passed
Since you left?

Necesitaba más amor
de lo que tuviste que dar

So many past names
And almost given last names
Too much to ever keep track of
Who the hell are you?
Who am I supposed to become?

Too many passing glances
And familiar faces
To ever keep straight
I'm sorry, do I know you?
Do I even know myself?

We grow our love
In a garden of weeds

Cheers to the girl
Who ripped my heart
To keep hers beating

Skimming sensation
From anothers skin
Has hollowed me out
Made every last corner
Emptier than the whiskey
Because not even drinking
Fills the hole you left anymore

"I never did." he said as he walked away forever.

It was in that moment
While lights were dim
and the temperature rising
That losing myself
To retain you
Became too much to bare

I miss you like the sun misses the moon:
Each day
And every night.

I thought of you
In the pale glow of the early moon
My fingers melted into every inch
Until my body shook
And my legs quivered
My jaw tensed
As my body sighed
Then all at once the bliss
Poured over me like crashing waves
Wave after wave of inocence lost
Drifting into the sweetest dreams

Does it make me evil
To love him
More than myself?

Do you read my words here
That I wrote for you
And only you?


And in those moments
Do you think of me
And only me?

Genuinely healing
Instead of hiding
Feels so **** good
Why didn't anyone tell me this before

When you left me
You took more than just my being
You stole my appetite

But when he's near
Each time he draws closer
He brings forth an animalistic hunger from deep within me

He pulls me in close to his heart as he sleeps because I know
He craves the sensation of my skin pressed against his own
Yet little be known I crave it worse than he does but my lips will remained sealed to protect those hearts

As for demons and devils
Keep them
I have my own

Watching my clothes
Drip from my skin
and slide down my bones
I realize the starvation
has worked too well
So now,
just how long
do I have left
before my face doesn't fit either?

and oh how the wind crashes and the waves hit her heart. they leave it cold and worn on the outside. yet in the inside she can keep a small fire going. she can stand and take all the abuse she has to and yet still remains positive. she can make rain clouds disappear but not her own storm. she is amazing and strong and the world keeps pushing down. she keeps her mind free yet filled with the worst. she looks for the light knowing she will only find darkness. she wants so deeply to see the truth and every time she sees whats there something fake is shoved down her throat.

oh the world is cold and hard. all like the mocking mirror she looks into. she looks for the smile and she finds the shadow. she looks for the life but yet finds empty space. her tears hit the floor and form a new surface for her to look at. that's where she can see the unkempt hate she had. the hate for the reflection she saw in the mocking mirror. no longer would see look at the space and see joy for all was on her level. She would then on look to the stars and the moon, for they are above her and they can shine in the darkness.

How could he do that to me
If he said he loved me
I've never known
A fate so cruel
Issued down by the hand
That held my heart

I know you wouldn't approve,
but I love this girl, you see.
She's a little rough around the edges
but shes filled with sugar and baked
to the ripe warm temperature of perfection
when shes in my arms.

But wait, I know...
I know I'm losing you at this point,
and you don't want to hear
a word I've said but wait, just
Wait.

Momma, I love this girl, you see
and its messed up and killing me...
Because, well, she doesnt know
how my heart howls at the moon
aching for her to be near me.

I want to give her everything.
Even if that's just the fragile mist of time
which drizzled through the cracks
of this shattered reality and broke apart against the rocky surface of the ever-playing nightmare.

Momma, I'm sorry...
I'm so sorry if you dont love me,
for the love I have for her.
But right now, I'm watching her
love someone else and Momma,
Momma, its killing your baby girl.

You still live inside my eyes
I see everything through you
At the end of the day I guess
That explains why I see the world
Crumbling to ash or
Bathing in blood

All along you were something
Not of this place
Physical or hyper-realistic
You were a tar pit I fell into
Now I deal with the ramifications
Mending my scorched flesh back together

Little girls fear the monsters
Hiding under their beds
Waiting in horror for the moment
It decides to strike
Rather, she should be waiting
For the daunting moment
nascent womanhood takes hold
And the monster under her bed
Becomes the man laying in bed
Next to her

You are the reason I fear I never
Give birth to a daughter
Your fingers reach far and dig deep
Souls like yours spawn from
The coldest flames
and the hottest anger
Therefore nearly eternal
Set forth to bring the end

When I think of the pain I felt
I try to think of all of the others
you will eventually trick
Much like what you did
to me
And I pick a religion
Then pray, and pray, and pray
And when I'm done
When I rise from my bruised and tired knees

I pick a new religion and I pray again
For all of those before me
And the ones to come after
I pray for the girls
Laying in bed and terrified of the things
All girls should be afraid of
Still ignorant to what men like you do
I pray they be preserved and find love
Only where love should be found
I pray for myself last,
because I have already survived you

But...do I ever pray for you?
In a moment of pride and strength
I will tell you I do-
in times of my weakness
I fall to my knees and I prayed
*You would be fixed

You can't destroy a monser
Without becoming one

I love you dearly
I truly do
But there is a darkness
In this heart of mine
It tells me
My love
Is not good enough

So yet,
I listen not to the voice
And give you all my love
However,
I will apologize
If it feels like I don't truly love you

Because you see
This love of mine
Is different from all the others

Your new girl looks like me
But my new man
Looks nothing like
the sad reflection
of my past

His music carried me
Each note drifted me farther
To new places and sights
Only the richest person could ever hope to see

Each pass of his fingers showed me a new light
Something different I knew
He had never shown anyone before
The music was no longer just a sound

It was living in the room with us
Showing us how to feel
Guiding us to the stars
Slowly melding our souls together

His eyes never met mine
But how could they?
He was already in his blissful place
I stood watching from the neighboring star

I envied the noise
For being so close to him
Knowing every inch of his heart
Like maybe I will some day

I am a hypocrite down to my core
So forgive me for trying to save you
When I never could save myself

Once again
Love prevails
And you are the proof of my victory

The odds are in my favor
But number are like stars
And they aren't always aligned

In your ash tray
Will remain long after
Evey other part of me has perished.

Is that you never blame yourself.

Becuase it wasn't your fault.

The path of self-destruction
Has never before
Tasted so bitter-sweet

Listen
Very close
It's rare the truth comes out
During the light of day
Or whispered in the shadows of night
So I beg you, listen
Look not at the clock,
But to your heart
Right now
Yes, this instant.

In this moment
You
Are
Perfect
You in this moment
Right now
Are exactly how you are supposed to be
All is happening how it should

Take comfort in knowing the world will turn
Now and forever
Always as it has
Even when you're not looking

So breathe easy
Rest soundly
You
Are perfect
Right now in this moment
Exactly how you're meant to be

She has bad idea
Written all over her smile

I cant wait
To kiss it off

The crimson liquid rolling
Rushing
Down your back and from your spine
Gushing
I see the blade you tried to hide
Thinking she was on your side

Its began to dry
-the vital sap
With her gone-
you've no handicap

But you left the blade embedded
Seems to her you're still debted
Yet you know you owe her not
For with her hands she gave you naught

With heavy heart I try to save
All along you've been so brave
Leave her be
-and come to me
My truth shall set you free

He strolled in with the badge he earned
Never for the man he was
But for the man he threw on the uniform to be
Pushing through failure until the bricks fall
Making way for the long life choice of training after heartbreak
and leaving to seek self-gratification
Not looking for the pieces of those broken when the bricks fell
March on without the fears of life or man
Forget not those who hurt him but remember to distance those he loved

I fall in love with the flowers before they even begin to bloom
Which is why watching them wilt before they blossom
Kills me the most

It must be against some
Law of Nature
For me to be happy
Since every opportunity I've ever had
Rots and decays in my hand

I'm bound to slip
Oops

Let me start by saying you

do

not

deserve

her love.

Nor do you deserve

my

body.

But we give you both anyway,
She because she loves you,
and me,
because I love her.

We were never in love
You wouldn't allow it
And even if I had fallen
You wouldn't have caught me
But oh dear God
How I could have fallen