They can't see me and I can't see them.
Hidden away under the nothing-lights.
Close my eyes to dream.
I see through the world and poetry.
I can see them, and my Demons stare at me.

My chest is being pulled till it creaks.
Colors leave the lines and fear takes it place.
Retreat now if only I hadn't lost my feet.
My armor turned to snow, Cold,Soft, and Breakable.

Open my eyes and I can't see a thing.
But I know they're staring back at me.

I put my hand on the ocean and the other on your heart.
I closed my eyes and I swear I couldn't tell them apart.

Some one told me I am a "Love Poet".
That what I write about greatly is that emotion.
I remember looking at him and saying,
"I write about the magic of sad little tragedies".
I don't write, I strip away the world and leave the words.

Something vexing about these people who "Know" me.
They look at me as if I were a wounded beast.
Pained by heartache and full of anger.
Truthfully, all I am is waiting.

Phrases come to mind when I think out loud.
My mother fears that all I do is talk to myself.
She doesn't believe when I say, "I am making a poem".

I guess I replaced my frilly phrases for honesty,
This... is this still poetry?

Maybe I've fallen too far in my own mind.

Give me a lie I'll hold it close.
A lovely fib is better than silence.
But then again I did wake up this morning.
My poetry became English's drunk Uncle.
Perverse as a God being born from Facebook.
North Dakota man without a sense of Wintermas.
Lights made the eyes so black and hollow.

I'm 12 stepping this depression.
Wake up and live in the moment.
Sometimes it's one day some times one minute.
Sometimes I dance.
Other nights I can't find the strength to get out from under the bottle.
My struggles won't be visual or even physical.

I look hard at the mirror, into the eye's of my greatest enemy.

I was told my worst habit is giving people my heart
before I knew anything of their character.
When trying to break this "Habit",
I found myself saying nothing.

The days can blend into one, I wouldn't notice.
Lack of ambition, a certain kind of content.
The drum dances silent just waiting for nothing.
Dull grows the flames that burn for an empty tomorrow.
Give me the pain of nothingness because I'm used to it.
My heart is growing cold just waiting for nothing.
Can't give up but too alone to give a ****.
What do I search for?  But for some lost thing I never had.
I know what I want...not this.

Raise your head up above those clouds.
Wash away these broken smiles.
Dancing on yesterday's graves.
This new-born sin sings unsubtley.

I don't even know where I've been.
I love that I don't know her.
I know that I don't love her.
I know where I am but I know nothing.

God cried and looked almost human
Soft pain was felt by those who felt those whimpers.
A thousand lifetimes burned away waiting.
Life moved on and so did the rain.
Warm sand never changed but by the waves.
God died and felt almost human.

This is my pain, it screams in the place between words.
This is my pain, Raising with the sun in the west.
This is my pain, Sighing like the clouds from our first touch.
This is my pain, Naked as the face of alcoholics.
This is my pain, Alone in the dark world of lights.
This is my pain, Drunk on the breaths I take to survive.
This is my pain and together we'll be.

Let me spill these from my mouth to the empty page.
Run my fingers through the prose and feel the warmth.
Creating worlds in this unforgiving land of peace.
Your shackle made of freedom has me choking on air.

Your happiness is a mask
Covering up something fundamentally broken.

                                          I looked at her and smiled softly for the first time that day.

Today like so many days out of my life, I want to **** myself. I want to die. Yes something is wrong with me, I am sad and brittle to my core. Some days I find that the light of the sun is a 100 lb weight on my shoulders just pushing me down. Some days I walk through the city feeling like I am moving through mud.

                                           I closed my eyes smiled genuinely.

Other days I am happy and I don't ask why I just roll with it, Some days the light of the world lifts me up and pulls me forward. Some days this city moves and I pick up my feet to match it.  But every day know that I am hiding nothing, this is who I am.

                                              She hugged me and I hugged her.

Happiness and strength come from vulnerability.

To not trust and to not believe in others
well that is not only selfish is it weak
and most damnedly it is cowardly.

I wear my heart on my sleeve
If I cry just know it wasn't because I didn't care.

I want to see if these are lies.
I want to hold these broken promises.
This day is wasted just not knowing.
Time waits for no man but we're two lost children.
Dressed like a clown and still wearing the crown.
Set fire to your lies and we'll never go cold.
I'm gone until you're not.
Dancing in the dark.
Lock the doors this is too much fun.
Just let me die not knowing.
Ignorance is bliss, and my heart is blistered from the "truth".

Can't I just lay down and drift away
Why must my hand yearn for another
This warmth of my heart craves more.
I want her next to me....But I want to be alone.

The fluorescent light flickered
Dancing the line of Life and Death.
Never resting and never moving.
The room filled with a hollow light.

The dreamer sat thinking of being awake.
Nights were filled with vain little ideas.
In the light, memories of the future became real
In the shadow of the sun this dreamer danced.

There's a chasm in me that goes, "Thump thump thump"
I've outgrown the pain of my broken heart.
Selfishly I look at the happy memories and smile.
Laying on the ground, raising my hands to hold the sky.

These empty rooms seem so crowded when I close my eyes.
I'm standing on a pool of rock shouting whispers at nowhere.
I want to say I raised my head, but all I do is close my eyes.
Every day I am growing closer the age I'll be when I die.

Can you look at me and just see me for what I am?
I was lost in the struggle for my own identity.
Now I am lost in the struggle for who I will become.
When I am gone without a sail, there is one constant.
In this abyss called me, I always know that I adore you.
When everything is cast in doubt, I know I want to make you smile.
When fear grabs me deep, it is your hand I want to hold.
Your laugh is the light that shatters my pain.
Now please raise me up one last time, and let us meet.

Today I woke up with a dream in mind, "To wander".
Throw away the map and dance to the beat of the clouds.
Chase the sunset till that ocean is far behind you.
Hold in your heart only the far away till we reach it.
Scatter pieces of my soul in places I'll never return.
Touch the abyss and smile at loneliness.
I'm going to run til this gas pedal gives way.
I'm going to run til this heart becomes whole.

It was his brightest hour.
He rose higher than ever before.
and fell so much further.
He the man with no shame.
The matchless King and his invisible kingdom .
It all turned to rot
as victory had defeated him.

There is a fire inside of me.
There is a fire and oh it screams.
It tells me move and to never stop.
My love has gone soft and my heart grown wild.
Dead are the eyes that gaze on this world.
What is beyond it is what they yearn for.
What is the unknown has become my kingdom.
In the daylight of worry I have found my feet.
If I weren't to move how would you follow?
Hard has grown the fire, but still she burns.
Still she calls for it with one word, "More".

Read a poem,
Found myself simply looking at words.
Thought "I can do this better".
looked around and went back to sleep.

I put a scar on the sky,
Watched the day turn to ash,
All the blue simply burned black.
So, darkness I became.

The colors left the lines and danced across my face.
Pain filled the warmth and turned the world cold.
I fell inward toward the eternity that once was my soul.

(I fell in love with her... and she didn't do the same.)

I screamed until my voice broke and then I cried until I ran dry.
She chose someone else and asked me to stay.
I would and I could, but my soul would break.
I hope she is happy maybe she'll be happier without me.
I pray she smiles everyday.
I pray she is happy before I go to sleep.
I pray she is happy When I try to wake.

I did a lot of screaming today,






                                                                                                                            Said the Heart.

I close my eyes, but not to sleep.
I close my eyes, but do not see.
Darkness in my words had crept to my eyes.
All the vibrant hues simply fell away.
I lift my head and it felt like sleep.
I felt nothing as I became all.

It is not the sound of sunsets smashing every night.
They die over and over for that makes them amazing.
A story that is not done is not yours to tell.
Ride with me, take my love and crash like thunder.

You're only reckless until you're wise.
The day ends so the night may begin.
What we'll do with this God only knows.
What we'll do with this only God can forgive.

Sometimes I dream I am awake
Alone in home not my own
Counting all the dreams I could not be
With rain trickling down my face.

This body holds in it only the strength of being weak.
This mind holds in it only the will power from Self-Doubt.
This face holds in it only the beauty of never being beautiful.
This mouth holds in it only the words made entirely of silence.
This heart holds in it only the pain of being full of love.

Under this crown I've found my home.
I grabbed the sky and tore it down tonight.
Smile from this jaw is a broken kind of light.
Let silence fall on this lonely kind of life.

Flames, Anger, and Hate are my crown.

I am fallen.

I in eternal anger have awaken the beast in side of me.

The violence in these eyes frightens me

We’re all monsters, and this is the age of beasts.

Don't give me your hope, I'll drop it.
Don't give me your love, I'll lose it.
Don't give me your dreams, I'll steal them.
Don't give me your fears, You'll scare me.

But if I ever ask..

Please give me all your hopes, Dreams, Fears, and Love.