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Melanie Feb 2014
So adhere I am to my failed attempt
My less than writing contempt
I feel stray, alone; unkempt
My body loathes rest
I can't read, or digest

No matter my effort, I place dead last
Here is to my crew;
Thanks for the cast
When it is all done it is said
To be past
I think what a thought to forget
What memoirs regret so fast

If I headed my way
I'd shy away pain in stance it came
I'd shun it's very shame width
I'd do so away with the spite in me,
To spare my height, I shallow
The bottom of my depth
Although it has proved aimless,
I shall continue to play pawn, like chess
I'll come back; I'll regress
Melanie Jan 2014
I am a reason to why
I am a treason to you & I
I am the grey in the sky
I am the very reason you deny

I am complicated
I am simplified
I am ridiculed 
I am ridiculous
I am hideous 
I am insidious
I am blunt like obvious 
I am nothing of this
I am everything to dis
I am not but everything

I am the cause of because
The accused of excuse
The present of the past
The taunt in your haunting
The mad behind your madness
I am sad, thus I only bring you sadness
The miss in your miss me
I am the reason you miss me

The stress in your distress
A mistress, except to you
A denial when its not true
I do nothing for you
This time I am telling you

I am stone cold, ten fold
I con to pro
I am oh so inconsiderate
I am probably illiterate 

My illustrations don't straighten ****
My demonstration is constrained
Disorderly, ashamed

Late like last night
Ahead during daylight
I am fine like irate
Chump change like castrate
I am last rate
I am vacuumed enough
 
I am in innovative 
Therefore 
I am freezing this..
Melanie Nov 2013
I'm
It's five a.m. I am dawn over, yet again..

I am the water I drink, the food I eat, the air I breathe, the sleep I sleep, the music I hear, the people I see, the places I go, the content I read, the player in my games, the epitome of lame, the disorder I blame, the weeping I wax & wane;
Chaos in a flame

I am the cigarettes I smoke brand name, unruly & untamed, the pride that I coincide with not having shame in who I am, the crazy in my eyes, my daughter's surprise, my fear's accomplice, my mother's only child;
What's worse, I'm wild

My father's little girl, my hair when I twist, & decide to give it a curl, I am five feet, seven inches short, I am a case to dispute, I do mind trivial pursuit, I am the upchuck I hurled, when I found myself among this world, I am dawned before sunset, I am still susceptible to surprise, I have blue/green eyes, I still can't see why god loves ugly, I am critique in concrete, on this couch I have a seat, three cats;
All lying around above below or beside me

I am beside myself, I need mental health, I scream with my mouth, still no one hears me out, I am down & about it, I gave up long ago, I am wishy washy windy, I cry tears laden with doubt, I too often have something that I worry about, I have been spread too thin;
I am disheartened on a whim

I am a cracked ***, I am a blossom out of stock, I am a non smoking ****, I don't get blown away like the leaves, I have skin that needs to breathe, I left my body because it's a pet peeve, I shed hair in long strands;
I am overthinking needing a weeve

I am punch drunk, I need sleep like I never slept, my pillows head away, I swept them up, put them down for a rainy day, yes I am a classifiable clown, I make path my own way, If only the right hook is in town, I am able to smile at my frown;

B E C A U S E   I   L O V E   T H E E   D E E P   D O W N
Melanie Oct 2013
Bombers & bloggers
Tragedy is triumphant 
Traffic gathers in a tweaked intersection divide
Wreaking of those fuming with exhaustion  
Speed, cause you prefer the highway

Political in place of partial
The news carries dismay
Where is such trouble in this world you say?

Posing proposing, regulating;
Marijuana laws are changing
Complaining of taxing & weighing

Football, do you recalls, & puppy dogs,
Amber alerts & nostalgia where it hurts
Once again the news contright  
Cut short cause it draaaags
Ruthless the truth is;
Everywhere you go, there the news is
You can't lose it, tied around your neck the noose is

Bed bugs It has;
Talking of spread shoots, ***** mags
This celebrity, the new 'fad', & that old hag

Throw up on the rag;

Forget it
Melanie Sep 2013
I walk the line
One that is mine;
Made of my own bundles of time withered twine

Sick as sorrow
Ill I fear
Will become tomorrow;
I feel it near
As it gets louder
The sound I hear..
For I am bait, it states
Telling me of my fate
Self-delegated
Intra-personal, between
Me myself & I, loud & clear

A heated drum
Banging words that go ***
Bitter shame
Brighter shun
I can not change what all I've wrong
I can not help who I have become
Perhaps I have come too far undone
Outdone
I'm spun
Anyone??

The sun above
My feelings below
I think too much
I think
I think about my head hitting a pillow
Muffling the sounds my heart yearns to wallow
When ever I think of all I've done & said,
Of all I'm ashamed of
My hands are sure to be holding my head up..
Melanie Sep 2013
Today
Tomorrow,
Yesterday
And
Every
Way
In
Between
A
Day

Each
Is­
One
Less
Of
A
Day,
In 
Some
Unexplainable
Way
I
Have
You
To
Expl­ain
Away..

What
Could
I
Possibly
Say,
When
You
Ask
Me
How
I
Feel­
About
You???

I propose I don't feel a bout you;

I feel you.

Your presence,
Your passion,
Your devotion..

I feel it
I feel you..

I'm spinning in motion
Fluid with ample emotion,
To flood the grandest ocean..

I feel it in quotation;
"My world"
I feel it in rotation


Feel
You.

I
Love
You.

I
Do.

I really, really do.

I feel I should thank you,
I must thank you..

For you, I'm so grateful
Be it a cause without you;
I'd be a cause to be lost,
A reason to be hateful..
" Thank You "
Melanie May 2013
The indifference inhumanely referenced

The nagging for censory sends down my spine misery

The audacity!

**** people make me so unhappy

The gull what is inside their skull?

The disbelief what is said through teeth

**** people are evil


Whoever told you looking outside would give you insight,
Is only, but halfway right

However, beauty is in the eye of the beholder;
Mother earth is only as pretty as you hold her
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