Death is slouching towards me
from the corners of the room
The appearance of truth
Revels in my impending doom

You exhale as I hold my breathe
As blackness claims the space
You gloat in selfish victory
While betrayal ingests my face

I remember like it was yesterday
You were a giant back then
Love was not inside your heart
As you wore the devil's grin

Curled in fetal positions
As fear tightened its grip
I cover my ears from the screaming
And hide my quivering lips

Nurtured is a foreign word
Forty years I've lived without
Starved of love & tenderness
I sit in blame & self doubt

A product of dysfunction
On the same destructive path
A child once filled with innocence
Has become the model's *wrath

Some will read no further
As it hits too close to home
Reflecting the mirrors image
To a face that's not their own

I sift through flimsy ashes
Of a charred and fiery past
I've burned some meaningful bridges
Chasing the spark I'll never grasp

As I walk along this desert plain
With soot beneath my feet
To the edge of flowing waters
Sweet surrender I hope to greet

There's debris below the surface
In an ocean full of fear
It holds the key to my freedom
Through murky waters I must steer

I seek to finally uncover
The truth that’s deeply hidden
Still the shadows and the darkness
Leave me sick; I am disease-ridden

In a place of utter misfortune
My mind is not at ease
The past she leaves me burdened
Unable to truly grieve

Crocked are the pathways
Through this journey I do stumble
Over judgments and harsh labels
Wrapped in constant turmoil

They say adversity gives birth to wisdom
An open heart will set me free
Perhaps I lack in vulnerability
Or am just too blind to see

Your footprints washed off
the shore today
It was just like you to go away
I never agreed to you leaving me
Drifting in oceans beneath the sea

You know me
I won't ask why
You spread your wings
To soar the endless skies

As you dance with sparkles
Beyond the stars
I hold dear the memories
And release the scars

Negative thoughts
Lavish with shame
Guilt has my number
Calls me by name

My mind the gatherer
Of failure and faults
Taking pride in her kingdom
She's the queen of assault

With fear by her side
And esteem feeling low
She brings me to my knees
With a single blow

Judgement steps in
When I'm down and out
Her mirror reflects
my pain and self doubt

Worry's a warrior
Not an ally of mine
Slow and methodical
She will **** me over time

Love lost is a fated death to the enamoured heart

I am the ragged rock
Amidst a seamless shore
The undercurrent
Of the ocean's floor

I am the whistling
As the wind sings through the trees
I am the sorrow
As true love leaves

I am the blinding white
Of a winter's snow
The piercing fright
Of a lion's roar

I am a flickering ember
Of a burning bush
The sweet surrender
Of a lover's touch

I am the night fall
On a sunset strip
The utter shame
Of a controlling grip

I am the last word
In a senseless quarrel
The painful regret
As I beg, steal & borrow

I am the fragrant scent
Of roses in bloom
The grim reaper
Of my impending doom

I am the galactic dust
Of this cosmic realm
The devil's muse
Of this living hell

I am the light at the end
Of this twisted tunnel
The timeless treasure
In a pile of rubble

I am the nothingness
Of the limited whole
I am the home
Within this wandering soul