I've never liked the number 13, So that's what I called you.
Hoping one day I would have to much rage against the number and it would ooze into my feelings towards you.

Yet, here I am, falling into pieces for you and wanting you to say more.
I want you to say,
"It's always been you," with a knowing smile.
"I want you to be my soulmate," your smile growing wider.
and most importantly,
"I love you and I think we should be more than friends."

The number 13 is such a strange number, I never tolerated it,
And now I can't seem to feel a warmth bond with that number.

We are too young to regret bigs things.
I guess that's why I didn't feel guilty at first.
But now every time I look at you it's like I can't breathe,
Without it feeling like I let you down.

I don't think I understood how I loved you until everything I did was based on how I could make you happy. I can't tell if that's a destructive part of me or the part that doesn't want to lose something that's so good for my soul.

I'm scared of having my own children.
All the what if's running through my head,
What if I forget them?
What if I say the wrong things?
What if they don't love me as much as I love them?
They would be my world and I can't mess up in this part of my life.

The feeling of a cool breeze
and warm sunlight on your skin
takes me to outer space

The feeling of letting your body
to freely sway against the rhythm
of a spiritual song

The feeling of pride and eagerness
when grasping new information
just for pleasure

This is what I feel should turn people on,
Turning them on to strive for more than what they deserve.