How do you convince yourself that others care?
Could keep asking but that's unfair.
Don't want to be nuisance,
But my head is full of nonsense
Shouting "you are ALONE ALONE ALONE!"
"Just go. Leave them be.
They're better off without me."

But people do love me.
They want me to feel safe
want me to be free
from the thunder
in my mind.

Maybe I can find
a way to tell me
it's all going to be
OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.

Every little while we get a little doubt,
We wonder should we just get out.
But really you were just feeling afraid,
thinking of others who have played,
The damage and marks they made.

Sometimes you just need to be courageous
and stay with that smile that's so contagious.
Because you know what?
Someone's guna really like your ****,
they'll treat you like a princess,
and maybe teach you some chess,
and make you feel better, without stress
even when you look a mess.

You won't worry about who messages first
or about having conversations rehearsed
they'll make you crack a smile when the world's the worst.

If you find someone who you always want to hug
who you always want to bug,
Please go tell them right now they are the best
No more stress.
'I'm HAPPY', I shout!
No more doubt.

She can't listen. He can't hear.
They'll never communicate I fear.

Tension fills the room with smoke,
I can't breathe I start to choke.

The words on the page start to fade,
drifting, what even is a good grade.

I try to leave, to escape,
but I'm bound, stuck here, duct tape.

I force a small smile,
i'll be okay in a while.

'What if I care more than everyone?' she asked.
'What if I have more feelings?'
'What if I feel pain more deeply?'
'What if I put my heart in completely?'
'What if no-one cares or listens?'

'What really matters anyways?'

But no-one answers...

When** you haven't written poetry in a while
try not to stress, you can do that anyway,
try to just express what you want to say.
Ditch the mask, the smile
if you're feeling distraught
don't ignore the thought.

Let it all out,
run and scream and shout.

Sometimes you're not okay,
but that really is okay.
I'm just hear to say
it's okay where you're at today.

Run and run and run
Somewhere, anywhere, just move
until your skin is hot and your heart is beating. For you though,
You've nothing to prove.

Let the pain out in the sweat that pours down your face,
instead of tears.
Don't think about what you said or should've said or any of your fears.

Uncrumple, unroll yourself out of your ball of paper,
make it is wide open as you're able
Stand up on your own two feet now good and stable.

Next start to move a little,
jog if that's all you can

now just run off your fear

Look how far you've come:
All the clothes you were too afraid to wear,
All the opinions you were too afraid to share.

It's okay my dear,
just run off the fear.

The worst part is I truely did think you liked me

The worst part is that I really did think you were different
You fit all my cliche ideas
Dance with me? yes.
Kiss me? Yes
Hold and kiss my hands? Yes
Call me?
Even pretend you know I exist?
No.
I don't know what I missed
Now I will look inside myself for imperfections that I didnt have before you.
I will try and remember what I did or didn't do
I'll look for problems in me because you're not here to look at instead
Even though the problem is you

Everyone pulling, ripping, tearing trying to lift themselves above water
While suffocating others in the process
But look around
The waters shallow
just stand up
Pick your friend up and walk on

What is okay?
Is it really a thing?
Are we ever really okay
Or are we just distracting ourselves from our hurt
There's something not okay with you and there's something not okay with me
But that's okay
I think
Maybe if we focus on others hurts
We can forget about ours for a while
Maybe i can smile for a while
Maybe i'm not doing okay

It's so much easier to say okay
Than to explain everything
Which maybe is nothing to explain at all i comparison I other peoples 'unokeyness'
Maybe it's just a bad day
Maybe I am okay

Preparing for a no
Before asking

Is like digging up seeds
Before there are signs of weeds

But which is worse?
The possibility of some tormenting weeds
Or
Not ever having a garden in the first place

My flowers could grow tall and bright and strong
They could be my purfume smell
They could be my smiles

Well i know
weeds do grow
And can **** my lovely flowers

I'll just plant some more

Try not to over think
My thinking voice thinks
But thinking about not thinking
Has just make me think more

Don't wait for him to bring you flowers
Dig up wherever ground you have
And create the garden of your dreams
You are in control of the colours
So make them bright
Pick ones that smell nothing like the cologne he always wears
None that could possible remind you of him
Plant your own flowers
He mightn't ever bring you some

You are the shark that tears me to bits
the ***** hairbrush that gives me nits

You are the liquid running down my cheeks
you are the my breaking after my confidence peaks

Have you ever seen a picture in an art gallery under a blown bulb
Ever felt like that light over your head
Instead of making your life brighter
Was dulling your colours.

You just want to steal others lights
aim it toward yourself
but that wouldn't be fair
to take their light because you have none there.

Get up go to a shop and buy a new bulb
Display your lines and emotions
that are already on your canvas
Dump that cloud over your head and get another light to shine on you

I miss that laugh you do when you say something silly
and regret it after
I miss when you check my reaction to what you're saying
and mirror it
I miss how you play argue about anything i say
I miss you looking to me first
I miss being your shoulder
I miss when we talked every day
I miss you starting the conversation
I miss you

Can I miss you even if I never really had you

It hurts to keep moving forward
But backwards is unbearable
you got this

Everything is going to be okay

Sometimes the one who smiles the most during the day
cries the hardest at night

Sometimes the one who is always there
Needs someone to be there for them

Sometimes the ones who try the hardest
Get it the toughest

Sometimes life isnt fair
Sometimes no one will be there

I** wish you didn't see ugly when you looked at me.
I'm so sorry I am the cause of your damp eyes.
I want to help I really do.
How can I tell you that although i'm completely honest
it's your eyes that lie. The tears tears cloud your vision.

I'll explain;
I see the whole picture, I  must focus on every detail. I dont mean to or necessarily like it this way but I do. I can't ignore anything that is there. Really, I just do my best to be fair.

You look too close at your reflection,
ignoring the beauty seeking ''perfection''
I become cloudy and then wait for the the water droplets
or lightning to break me.

I look when you can close your eyes, I stay focused as you dream of colourful skies. Well my eyes are hot lightning from all the storms.
I don't mean to start them I swear I don't. It's not easy for me remember.
I am without the ability to console.

So next time you see me how about a smile, reflect your inner pretty soul. not a stare, eye contact is tiresome, not for too long
just a smile and move along.

It's not a feeling,
It's in your imagination.
Maybe it's that top,
Maybe you've been ditching the gym,
Maybe your coco could do with a skim.
But today, tomorrow, next christmas, in the morning;
You are beautiful and should be happy in you.
Fat is not a feeling.
Even if it was
Feelings are temporary just like weight.
Remember you weigh less in space anyways.

I hope you smile so wide your face hurts,
I hope you laugh until you can't breath
I hope you feel the bubbles that I feel

Maybe if we all felt good more the world
would be a better place
Well i've heard it's contagious
Try and fit a smile onto your face

We take off our armour, take off our makeup
and we lie in bed.

We are defenceless and real.
Real to feel what we really feel.
We are raw,
We have nothing to distract us from ourselves.

What do you think of when you lie there?
Do pass through your thoughts anywhere?
Maybe I have thought of you, not only you,
But you're one of the many pages of my books.

Maybe i think too much and sleep not enough
but i do try to understand why your smile
crosses my mind when my armour's off

You're the water slipping through my hands,
to quench someone elses thirst,
my lips start to crack
enough of this flirtation
feed my dehydration

If you are going to cut the rope that holds us together
please do it now before i get too high
It will hurt less when i've hit the ground

If you don't want to snap the threads that join us
maybe after a little while, before the rope starts to thin,
Tie a knot and show me that nothing's breaking

He shines** like the sun
Most vibrant when few are watching

I should have rose early more frequently
because i wasn't alone in seeing his beauty

Those hours I lay in bed waiting for the sun to shine for me
I should've been out i should've climbed the highest tree
and gave my ultimate attention
Ignored the world's tension.

Now there's a wall that blocks my colours
And my world is to become a whole lot duller.

Why when it's over do we always question what is wrong with ourselves
Maybe, just this once the problem was theirs.

It's not your fault I never said anything
that would even slightly display the way
I've been feeling toward you,
It's not your fault I didn't say..

You don't owe me any thoughts
or even any loyalty,
how would you think otherwise,
It's not your fault I didn't say..

But this is me writing to you
Telling you
That I think you're pretty sweet,
That I adore your company,
That I want to spend more of my time with you,
That I get jealous when you talk to her more than me,
That I want to hang out at 2, Saturday,
That it's not your fault you don't know,
It's not your fault I still didn't say.

Does it ever work out? Is it possible to love someone forever?

Beauty is a strange thing,
We search and beg
Through airbrushes and lies
Trying to be an impossible beautiful
That doesn't exist.

That doesn't stop the
disappointed tears that roll down his
plump cheeks and second chin
that makes him somehow less
Worthy than a model with one.

That doesn't stop the girl
whose reflection deceives her
down to skin and bone
because that is what is beautiful,
What is attractive,

But stop, please stop,
Beauty is the smile that lights up your eyes,
Beauty is the way you helped him,
Beauty is your expression through art,
Your encouragement,
Your humour,
Your strong mind,
Your good heart,

Beauty is you.

When was the last time you felt like crying?
Was it something beautiful that you saw?
Was it the pity for others you felt?
Was it something so happy you couldn't keep your eyes dry?
Were you tired? Were you overworked?

Or was it someone who didn't care,
Who wasn't even worth the tears you shed?
Was it someone always and yet never there?
Someone you just can't get out of your head.

Words are nothing just a few shapes, sounds,
Then why do they hurt me so much?

Step 1: Find a boy/girl
Step 2: Fall very deep
Step 3: Get rejected (Like a boss;)
Step 4: Cry very sad tears
Step 5: Pour out your soul into a poem
(Maybe not a very professional poem but at least it's real)
Step 6: Post on hello poetry
* 7: Get a few hearts
* 8: Poem goes trending
* 9: Cry very very happy tears
Step 10: Find a new boy/girl etc etc
* If you are really really lucky!

You words tell of hurt and loss
But the way you write is so much more.

You fill hello poetry with your thoughts and concerns
You open up and leave yourself raw

Your writing is quite beautiful,
Never the same, never cliche, you write what's real to you

So I want to take this time to appreciate your words.
with a few words of mine as I try to sum up how awesome you and your poetry is.

In your poem Backwards I thought it was really clever how the story is told from the bottom. I hope you realise that you don't need to be fixed you are you, you are real and that should be good enough for everybody else.

In your poem Beyond Repair I love the short simple lines that make it all the more meaningful and I like how I think I can relate to how you were feeling when writing this.

To sum it all up you really bring colour to hello poetry with your poems and I hope you keep writing and that I will see you get better and better.

It's not the talking that hurts me
It's not her giggles
It's not the walking with that hurts me
It's not how she looks at you,
I don't mind with who you talk,
Or along whose side you walk,
I just want you to be happy.
It hurts to know
That she is much prettier,
Much more interesting,
Not as needy,
Not crazy
It hurts to think you could fall for her instead.
So i'll just trip you tomorrow and hope for the best!

No matter how much of an open book you are
people will still read what others wrote on your back.
They don't see the scars there or the pain you felt
No they are hidden beneath this leather
They only see the number of stars you've been given
Not the the real world you live in.

So please, do this for me
I won't even make you open my book,
I just ask for a non-judgemental look.
A moment for you to rest your mouth
And learn what i'm really about.

When my phone beeps i wish it was you
When I giggle i wish it was your joke
I wish it was you saying those words i long to hear

Sometimes i wish everyone else would disappear
and leave us to be what I know we could be

Maybe I'm just bored

Maybe I'm just lonely

I don't want to hurt you

I don't want to lose you

holding on to your sweet words like holding my fingers on the chords..hurts one part but builds up the other.

Can both sides of a stick burn equally
Or does one side dampen smoke
While the other burns red
The red in all of us that smokes others in our lives.

Can we ever both love equal or will one always care more?
Will one always be half way out the door?

Now is the time
You'll regret it after
if you dont do it this very second
but what if my queries turn him to laughter
what if i've misread the signs
But that book i've studied
Now is not the time to sit in bed and read
You will ask him
you have the courage
I know you do

Really what's the worst that could happen
Rejection scars heal..
Tears dry..
You won't die..
Better a chance of success than never trying..

Now get your wipes,
Clean those dark circles,
A bit of powder,
Words in your mind,
Jump little thing, now fly!

Soaring so high,
Can hear all the angels sigh
As I dip and dive.

From way up here
The small creatures should have no fear
I'm too high to shed a tear

I don't want to ever come down
I'll just turn back around
No worms shall I eat
No branch shall I heat

Because I wish everyone could feel the way I do now
with my feathers skimming clouds and my morning tunes never too loud.

I'm free,
I wish all could feel like me!

Maybe life is only difficult so that we realize the good when it's here. Maybe if it wasn't for the tears the smiles wouldn't be so sincere.

I see you drive past me,
as if you were barely there.
You try to smile but manage
only a grimace that made me stare,
I wonder why you aren't smiling
What troubles did you face today-
I wished I stopped your rusty red car,
wish I had helped and not left you in dismay.
If you do read my little poem to you I hope that you know
That I hope you smile tomorrow and do not feel so low
Because you are a strong person too
And even if you don't feel this now, you can make it through,
through whatever is going on right now,
You have already come so far,
The woman in the little red car!

I* was outside last night,
looking at the stars under the moonlight
And then a thought hit me,
it made me fall deep..oh all the things I could see
That moment I realised that noone else will ever stand in this spot
Noone else will ever see what i see, ever think my thoughts
So I should write down a few
I dont know what else to do
if that's what you like, make sure you *do it too!!

I* can arrange words in to any sequence
That explain perfectly how I feel.
I can write about how your eyes light up
as you talk of what you want to be.
How your worried, stressed creases disappear
when you talk about your dreams for your future you see.
How you dance like I would if I was home alone
with the radio on.
How every word you say
seems to be taken from a very wise book.
How you don't know how great you are,
How I wish you did know.

I can plan all the words to say,
Every little motion to do..
But when I see you all I can manage is
Hi how are *you?

You are not perfect but you are beautiful,
Not everyone will see that beauty, but it's there,
You don't need to cover it up with makeup.
You don't need short clothes or alcohol to be a fun person.

Your body may be too big in places and too small in others
but at least you have one.
Not everyone will like you but you are still awesome.
Chose to be with the ones who do.

Your sole purpose to exist is not to please or pleasure anyone,
If you know deep down you should, just leave.
Listen to the little voice in your head it can often be very wise.

Help everyone you can, you might need their help another day.
Don't forget your values, your inspirations.
Don't forget why you chose certain roads.

If someone hurts you; say it,
If you appreciate someone; tell them,
They won't be here for ever.
Speak up for what you believe in.
Do the things you always said you would.
Reflect but don't forget to keep moving forward.

Love,
Create,
Smile,
Live.
Be yourself even if you haven't figured who she is yet. ^.^

Sometimes words do hurt
and stones build houses.

Sometimes words do break me
and sticks keep me warm.

Sometimes kisses aren't soothing
and being alone is better company.

Feeling so little
Short i may be
In case you were wondering 5, 3
But's it's my mind that feels so small
when I can't help but recall,
how you never want to talk to me.