Battered eyes stare up
in surprise as
Storm strewn skies part to
swallow and
eat, upon their flesh.
This is truly the sign
of a divine caress.

I pray to believe,
wish to look into the heated
moistened breath of
an untamed creator, a
predator, a
beast without mercy.

Somehow stare up at a
loving, pitying,
purpose
for
This.

Maybe I shall ask
Why?
The question everyone
appropriately, apparently,
'admits' to wishing to ask
of their path to
the granter of
the kiss
of air.

Whose apple's poison
stripped us bare to
awareness.

So we want to know, do
we?
Why? Why? What?
What What What
HOW
Could you throw a part of
you
down to rebirth. Your
children of Earth trapped with
the Un-see-ers.

Some of which call themselves
your 'Believers'.
Their love as sincere, and as
rich as 'Beliebers'...

You have become too fashionable,
My Lord. Your many
faces grace the
bored with
fulfillment... they're
using you for entertainment.

They show your teeth,
your fangs,
your bangs.
You cannot be wild here,
you cannot be loved
fully
here.
Our fruit filled hunger can
never be sated.

Love me God?
                         Could you
                                            love me?
Never.
You left me here to
persevere* regardless,
was it a mistake? When
you chucked me down,
naked, guard less and
mutilated?

You left my Life Deck
card less.
So, I'm forced to hide my
hand, my
brand from
'God'...
I hide, because you've
let them hurt
me.

Residing in Silent Sorrowful
Secrecy. The reincarnation
of your Scales,
watch Life nail me down, as
I offer up my body,
tarnished,
damaged and
creased.

I am no more than your Beast,
waiting patiently for
your judgment
feast.

I am, Least.

You=Sin=Me

He looks up at me with fragility,
his panic an unseeable mask from
reality.
I have lost him to his past.
I cannot fix this,
cannot change this,
but I'll try.

I'll try to make it bearable,
For him,
because I love him,
and that's what loved ones do.

"Is there anything I can do?"
I murmur, lighting treading
my words into the forest of his brain.
I shall remain here till I can find him
once again.

"No"
His face so weary with defeat
stares down at the floor, and at his
feet. In these moments I see him
weak.
Alone.
Like me, but not.
The Child the Parents forgot.

"Would you like me to leave?"
I stroke his hair, an involuntary
gesture, used almost to assure
myself that he is still here
with me.
At least in body.

"No"
The voice reaches out to me,
and speaks of beatings,
loneliness,
and pain. I watch the stains
drain him, so engrained in him,
it's hard to watch.
I want to wash his mind,
to find a piece of light to
curl between his fingers
and make
him cling to
tight.

I want to make it right.

And so I wait. Cast a breadcrumb
trail of bait, and will him
back to me.
Patient, and understanding,
holding and
hoping to travel an
embrace into the past,
and raft my love
to freedom.

Come back to me
Please

I don't like it when you leave me

Time always has an echo.

I'm left looking up again.

Brown, worm dulled, walls of dust
Slowly rust away my grin
The pits of depression opened again
Within.
It is me.

The roots of this tree cling to
My head
It's tendrils of dirt seeping
Through
Feels like

With this feeling.

This ancestral tree like a ceiling

My limit.

I feel done.

The weights branching in ton
By ton
By Ton
Try to run, but you can't
Sometimes you daren't
Because it's
Pushing
It's pressing
You
Down
Down
Down

Into soil, into more
More toil.

Into the ground,
Where you'll be found
Possibly, one day
Too late.
A crater of bones
Is your fate.
Ouch, that's a bit dark?

Try not to turn into
Brittle
Burnt up
Bark.

Deeper
Deeper
Deeper

My head's full of dirt.

It's going to hurt, but
I'm going to make it.
Scratch myself out
Scream and shout and
Kick away doubts of
Normality.
Allow reality,
Leave leaves of mould behind,
Find a seedling of light
And fight for your
Own.

Allow myself to grow,
**** to compost
Ashes to Ash
Dust leaves me
Now.
God knows how,
But time shall wipe off
The grime.

Once again I'll make myself mine.

Play me like your instrument
Reach inside
And find the notes,
Unplug the headphones
And watch me float
On natures music
If you should choose it.

Reach inside and unzip
My second skin,
Stroke the snare as
I watch,
Strip me, lay me bare,
Prepare.

Reach inside, and pull
Back the sheets,
The clink of springs
A xylophone,
Trickling out a tune,
Soon.

Reach inside, and pump
The pillows, watch the
Noise filled pause billow
Out rest stops of tension
And apprehension.

Setting for the show

Change emotion with the motion,

Now

Reach inside and grip
My heart
It's urgent bass beat cues
The start, the warm up
Of this performance.

Now.

Reach inside and slip
Through my blood,
Your music shivers
Up my veins,
An invisible trail,
I beg you,
Take what remains

Now

Reach inside and ******
My lungs away,
The heavy gasp of breath
Beats beatbox any day.
Take them, they're yours.

Reach inside and whisper
in my ear,
Unleash a hum of empathy,
Steer me, clear me
from the coast with the
Ships of my hips.
Take them, they're yours.

Reach inside and pluck
on my strings
Take your pick and
Weave your way
Within.
Take them, they're yours.

Reach inside and finger
at my chords
The ****** of the piece
Applause enough to live on,
Each gasp lingers, strong.
Take them, they're yours.

Each gasp lingers through.
Clear

Reach inside and find
the notes,
My lyrics soaked in
Joyous expletives
Raw and sensitive,
Take them, they're yours.

Take me, I am yours.

Tonight I dream of spiders
Hair spun, fat filled, scuttling legs
Quiver over my body and thighs
Eyes, ears, mouth, a tongue
A taste perforates through my eyes
Spills into my skull

Splat, Slash, Splot
Scuttle

Tonight I dream of Isolation
My footsteps fall on empty ears
Searching for life
Fearful, Tearful
Ripe with Strife
What does this matter?
I cannot be seen.

Unhear my own quiet screams
Please,
I want to
I need to
unhear.

Tonight I dream of running
An unseen assailant
I know, wishes to
attempt on me harm

You can't be calm
I can't, You can't
I Must
You mustn't provoke me.

I wake reaching
Reaching
Reaching

I find nothing
But empty solace.

Tonight I dream of fighting
Clockwork childhood
Figures slicing at my
face, racing me
to death.
A metal axe, a clawed
arm, walls with eyes,
a broken staircase,
distorted laugh, a
past repeated.
'Treated' to terror
remember me
dismember me
tenderly
race me
erase
me

I can't seem to wake up.