I feel spent
I don’t know where all my inspiration went
Silly musing of no worth
Remnants of the afterbirth
Rotting
Putting out a stink
Block my ability to think
I said it all
Real loud and clear
To nobody who wants to hear
Maybe it’s a superpower;
Invisibility
But it sure feels like a curse to me
Echoing here
Silently

I watched you lose him
It took all of a second
A flash of a smile
Dimpled and sweet
He took to it
Like a dog to meat
It’s a good thing
Dogs are so otherwise
Adorable
And give such special treats

The problem with you
Still got that same attitude
You had at sixteen
You’re a man living in between
Incorrigible to some imaginary
Enemy
When will you see
It’s within thee?

Are you overly ***** today
Or is this how you always are?
My "succulent lips"
And "luminous skin"
Can't help but feel
Your game is thin
Did you happen to read a book
With Fabio on the cover
Because in the real word
I prefer
A genuine lover
Who doesn’t throw me lines
Regurgitated
From what someone else has said before
I’d really rather have
The truth, instead of lore

“Hit the road, Jack”
Just might be the most
Poignant line
In all of music

A glorious past
It’s certainly enough
To be great
And you don’t want to become what you
Hate
But I know in my heart you are better
Than that
Greater than a limit creator
Upon yourself
But all of us, too
You can’t be fresh and new
Get ova yaself, Boo
Youth fades
Wisdom  rains, reigns and reins
Don’t you got something else to say?

It came down to me lowering my expectations
Or
Him changing his lifestyle
We parted as friends
Painlessly
Over quickly
Like all doomed relationships should be

He’s such an amazing guy
Who’s only fault is that
He looks like Harvey Weinstein
Oh my

I keep acting like I want your attention
The truth is
It’s terrifying
I’m the moth who cannot resist the flame
And however I meet it
I will not be the same
I only have myself to blame
The journey of burney
I take willingly
Knowing it probably won’t end
EVER
For me
Maybe I can make myself believe
That’s how I really want it to be

Maybe it will never be
Between you and me
I can’t let go of the fantasy
Until you set me free
I realize it’s not fair
To put the burden on you
A girl shows up from nowhere
And won’t let go until you do
You ignore, and it will continue
And I come back and play a fool
I been hoping and praying
For someone to make me forget about you
And that’s where we’re at now
But not really
There is no “we”
It’s only me
Talking to myself
In front of everybody
Wondering if you even see
I don’t know what would be
More disappointing for me
If you have no idea I’m here
Or if you actively
Ignore me

I thought
“I wanna always trend at the top”
But if every one
Liked every thing
What worth would it be
If no matter what dumb thing I say
Everyone agreed?

People come here
With souls laid bare
A part of each shared
How can it be
This place is so drama-free
When everywhere else
Is as fake as can be?

How long do you fight for
What seems impossible?
Do you hope the desire
Dries up
And goes away?
Do you find something else
To lead you astray?
Does a dream unrealized
Call your psyche home?
Does it settle in your bones?
Ever there to taunt and tease
Staying so far out of reach
Does it approach
And then it leaves?
That probably is the way of dreams

Winning, and losing
Wanting, and choosing
What it be
Maybe we see
Already

Trying to win you over
Was like trying to take off in a helicopter
From the ground
In the middle of downtown
And I’ve never even driven a helicopter
I didn’t take off
Yet

Questions
I already know the answer to
Are hardest to ask

Just a good old boys
Never meanin' no harm
Beats all you never saw
Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born
Straightening the curves, yeah
Flattenin' the hills
Someday the mountain might get 'em, but the law never will
Makin' their way the only way they know how
That's just a little bit more than the law will allow

Honesty is not an alibi for ignorance
We get you’re entitled to feel and say
However and whatever
But if you feel despicably
And if you say stupid ****
Nobody absolves you
Because you really meant it

Hemming and hawing
Braying and cawing
Practically bawling
Begging for you
And this inept
Grab at a slice of attention
That never comes
Is all this dummy can do

Maybe it never meant anything
Maybe nobody paid attention to it, but me
But that cannot possibly be
When I play the fool
It’s usually something everyone sees

You are the forest
Yet unexplored
Full of life
And dappled light
I can’t wait to hear
Your crickets at night

Not sentimental
Typically
When it comes
It’s a surprise to me
I could go on
About the whys
And careful worded
Overdue goodbyes
But hellos are
More interesting
One last goodbye
For all the goodbyes
I’ve got?
Why not?
Goodbye
Settling for less
Goodbye wrong ones
And accompanying mess
Goodbye poor choice
And self esteem
Welcome bold voice
And all that means
Take it on the chin
If must
Goodbye to to all that mental dust

I come across a brilliant poem
Gem
Just gorgeous
Sitting in the dust
Touched upon by wind
But never carried in
Sitting in the crowd
As dust will sit
And accumulate
Dusty gems
Everywhere
While the crowd stays convinced
Gems are rare

He is my amnesia boyfriend
C’mon
You know that guy
You know you used to love him
But you can’t remember why

It wasn’t ever gonna be
So I destroyed it purposely
That way I could make myself believe
The rejection came from me
Minds play games
Desperately
I wonder how long it will be
Until I stop writing him poetry

I fall off the e
                     d
                     g
                     e
                     !

Loss
The greatest teacher of all
You can’t learn to walk
Without learning to fall
Nobody great
Scores every play
Success surely has a cost
Paid in advance through loss

Sometimes I can really bring it
Other times
Tapped
And then
I try to write a poem about that
All the wack and wonderful
To be drawn about
And here I sit
Tapped out
Inspiration hardly ever comes
When it’s begged for
So I sit here
Feeling like Eeyore

My journey is heading in your direction
A life still under construction
When I finally get to you
Bringing everything I’ve been through
Will I be so black and blue
That I appear too damaged to you?  
In the big scheme of things
It doesn’t matter what you see
The only opinion that matters
Is the one I have of me
And I’ll keep evolving in my head
Maybe even after I’m dead
It may be we’ll never meet
But you’ve still had an effect on me

I think you’re an insensitive ****
And also a hypocrite
Too
You should also get over yourself
If you assume this poem is about you

Ego got the best of me
So I'll turn it into poetry
All the things we think we know
Resist with force to being shown
Performed my little dance and song
But you were right
And I was wrong

I’m in this moment now
And I don’t know you
Something I’ll continuously have to accept
But not my whole life through
It isn’t painful
Though not without ache
I’ll move past it, someday
I am destined for a different fate
I’m happy and blessed
Either way
Thank you
For being
Someone to aspire to

Giving up
On something important
When do I say when?
Maybe it should have been long ago
But here I still am
Trying as hard as I can
Maybe it’s pitiful
I know I’m a fool
But there is no universal
Giving up rule
I don’t know if I should quit
But you do

I’d like to call myself a master at this game
But I’ve failed every time before
Must have some success in store
And if there ain’t
I don’t wanna play no more

How can I write a poem about
How perfect my home is?  
Nothing rhymes with Massachusetts

I wish to be seen
Ideally from you
But whatever
Wonderful man will do
He’s out there somewhere
He must be
The ever elusive
One for me

Most of us are superheroes
Who haven’t yet found our
Secret identity

He wants us to believe
He lost his poetry
When that cannot be
He has it so naturally

Empty
Just another word for
Clean slate
Full of possibilities
Regardless
Of how it got
Wiped
Clear and clean
Might be the cleanest slate
I ever seen

Do I owe an explanation
If I disappear
Ghosting the ghost
Who never did hear
What good is a dramatic exit
Of an empty room
No doors to slam
No wheels to burn rubber
All this flim flam
Forever undiscovered
Time
Effort
Heart on a sleeve
Wasted speech as I leave
Empty

Hollow words sound so beautiful
As they echo
In an otherwise empty room

You enter the mix
Uneventfully
Just there, one day
And it felt you had always been
No waves or even ripples
Just a gentle warming of the waters
And then you were there
Water becomes playful
And quenching
And
Absolutely Necessary

It felt contrived
And reaching towards a place
I don't want to go
Aimed at people I don't
Want to travel with
It came from some part of me
I'm in the process of
Deleting

Poetry
Can be
A way to recreate
Reality
Or at least
***** about it
Incessantly

You like me too much
You think I am better than I am
I am uncomfortable with
Your vision of me
It is a poor reflection of society
That it is sometimes more comfortable
To be underestimated
Than it is to be overestimated
But
I’m not sure what it says about me

Man cannot build
Anything that lasts forever
Except an idea

I like me
Maybe it’s overconfidence
Or stupidity
But I’m forcing myself here
So you can know me
Assuming you’ll fall in like
With what you see
All this effort put in by me
It’s like somebody passed me a mike
And I walked up on stage
Filled with sass and frass
Confident you won’t resist my ***
You ain’t no fool
You know I’m madd cool
You won’t hold out forever
I have an invisible way with you  
Deeper than surface
Thicker than blood
Time immortal
This union be
Even if you never connect with me
It’s already there
The stone that will never crumble
Art is eternal

Mother Nature
Eternal muse
Doesn’t aim to please
She just does how she do
Appreciated by all
From humans to fleas

Maybe you don’t see
That you are a blessing to me
And I hope it to be true
I am a blessing to you

I hope you love
The loveliest one
I hope you smile from ear to ear
Knowing she is near
Despite what you probably believe
It would make me happy
If you showed your happiness to me
Whoever you in love with be
I’d love to see
You happy
With anybody
Even if she’s not me