I watched you lose him
It took all of a second
A flash of a smile
Dimpled and sweet
He took to it
Like a dog to meat
It’s a good thing
Dogs are so otherwise
Adorable
And give such special treats

She told me to pray
It is some kind of cure-all
At least according to some
Who suffer through whatever it is
While praising the one
They think gave it to them
Because He can take it away
If they only remember to pray
Wouldn't it be perfect
If it really worked that way?
Maybe if God was a girl
We'd get a lot more of what we're asking
Clearly we need a God
Better at multitasking

And the banjo has come out of it’s case
Spectacular finger picking awaits
Orchestrated with the fates
Tales be told about it someday
This music is gonna stay

Curious
The enigma of you
Contradictory in all you do
Smooth and gritty
Dumb and witty
Altogether  way too pretty
*****
Clean
Awake while I dream
Full and empty, too
Light and dark
Fire and spark
So uniquely you

I see your potential
Your feelings are raw
Spilling out unrefined
But relatable and true
I get the feeling you’ve been searching for
An identify
But before you find that
You need to set your poet free
Through editing
No matter how illogical
That be

To keep the peace
I let you have a piece
And you kept that, too
It wasn’t worth the argument
To proclaim it didn’t really belong to you
For all your posturing delusions
I’m pretty sure you knew it, too

Dear sir
I think you have mistaken poetry
For an advertisement
To the club you belong to
In the form of a
Written lecture
Trying to pretend
It is poetry
But this poem is really in vain
Because if you read it
You will say
"I wonder who this 'poem' is talking about."
One of the most beautiful things about Poetry
Ambiguity
I can creatively
Tell someone to "*******"
And who knows how many people will think I'm talking about them?
Or tell someone they're wonderful
And make however many people
Feel wonderful
Others can relate
And find common ground
Dear sir,
I think you have mistaken poetry

Maybe I didn’t try hard enough
But we both know that’s not true
I suppose I could have tried longer
If I was stronger
But I am a spineless shrew
I can blame it on my invisibility
But I know you could hear me speak
I’ve got no excuse
And you’ve got plenty
But frankly, sir
It would have been easy
For you to just tell me to leave
It wasn’t your responsibility
We both know that to be true
But when you’re pretending
To be unaware
There’s no such thing as
True and fair

It is a hard thing to do
To give up on you
When there’s no one else
I want to look to
I wish there could be
Somebody new
To capture me
So I wouldn’t have to be
So hung up on you
Nowhere slowly
Always going to
I’ll never get to you
Obviously
You don’t want me to
A decision made by you
You got your reasons
Probably good
Shoulda coulda woulda
Should
Doesn’t apply
And you are not a stupid guy
Your judgement is clear and sound
I wish you expressed in some way
That you liked me hanging around
But I get it
Everyone would know
And maybe my obsession will grow
Unhealthy
Or maybe it’s been so all along
Ya boi won’t associate with me
Obviously
I cannot see
What I really be
And still believe
I’m heading somewhere
Slowly

Did you notice?
Probably not
You got right there
And couldn’t say it
I know you wanted to
I know why you couldn’t
It is not a shortcoming or a fault
To be a gentleman
A celebration of your positive
Qualities
Is in order
The world has got enough tough guys

The thing about you
I wish I knew
Are you content
Or are you intimidated
By your own sense of worth
Value
Which can never be properly viewed
By you

He threatens with his absence
Torturous for you
When he's gone
You muddle on
Barely getting through
You obsess and cry all day
His insensitive social media page
Goes on, happily, alone
Leaving you to atone
Because you've committed some
Unknowable sin
Or maybe failed to worship him
You're begging now
To be let back in
So you can start it all over again

If one repeatedly attempts Plan A
Ineffectively
Does it
At some point
Ever become Plan B?  
Or even Plan Z?
How many times
Can an attempt bomb
Before the planner accepts
She was wrong all along?
Time invested
Ego too
All sorts of excuses
She went through
Bargaining, flirting, and pleading too
She tried everything she could possibly do
Still, that girl just came up short
Even after she put in so much work
It was destined to fail from the start
Anyway
Maybe she will accept that one day

You worship for the reward
When it should be solely
Appreciation
“Thanks for everything
God
But you owe me extra
Because I have worshipped you
Nobody worships perfectly
But for my imperfect worship
You owe me”

Wat of if I loose my mind?
Sometimes?
Is that ok with u?
Can I be tru?  
My ugly too see
Numerously
When u look at me
Must be

He is most Beatles’ songs
He is Chaka Khan
He is that feeling you get on the swing, when you go so high and your
stomach takes a second to spin
He is homemade pizza cooked by a man named Nunzio
He is the perfect blue cheese dressing on fresh tomatoes
He is the warmth that starts in your heart, and winds up in your toes
He is the sneeze you been waiting for with a tingly nose
He is, finding your kid in the kitchen washing dishes unasked
He is the fresh air you get, when you finally take off your mask
He is the clean taste in your mouth after you brush your teeth
He is the end of the day, when you put up your feet
He is the smooth on your legs, directly after you shave
He is, the blissful feeling of the couch after a long day
He is finding your house clean, with no idea how it got that way
He is the sun
And the rain
Depending upon the day
He is the moon at night
He is also dawn’s first light
He is the reason women pray
He is brand new car smell that never goes away
He is the house that gives full candy bars on Halloween
If you happen to drop your lollipop
He is the only place that is clean
He is a surprise rainbow when you thought it would be cloudy all day
I’ll share this, but I’ll probably have to edit
Because I can tell you right now
I’m not giving him enough credit

There’s a man on my street
Who’s obsessed with his yard
Meanwhile he’s ignoring
His wife falling apart
Maybe it’s just a cause and effect
One of them must have started the neglect
She doesn’t even put her shoes on
Anymore
When she goes to the store
He’s out with his hedge clippers
And his women is wandering
Around in slippers
And a frown

But they got the neatest lawn in town

Neglecting to like
Isn’t really neglect
Pretending to like is the real neglect
It’s saying
“I approve of the not good you
more than I have to.”
And yes, it’s true
Even the not good you
Will do
Good enough
Is ok
But I’m not gonna like it
When you go that way
Friendship requires honesty
I won’t blow smoke up your ***
And you don’t do me

The house is made of wood
The family made of stone
Chips may fall
It will grind down
Someday
It may be gone
Depending upon
The storms
Or lack thereof

You blame him for it all
Claim he ruined you
But you were already
Bent and broken
Before that guy came through
And since you been around
He got banged up
Too

I could make promises to myself I don’t mean
Try to make a break that’s clean
Swear to every deity
Take an aching knee
I wish I could believe
If only so I could pray
For you to notice me
Vibrantly

I recognize the alchemy
Of the unseen
It exists independently
Connection clean
Or *****
Who knows
What it be
Nobody
Unless we see
Maybe it’s only me
Who needs to see
In which case I apologize
Profusely

I ain’t planning on leaving here
Willingly
If you ain’t planning on coming with me
I ain’t planning on staying endlessly
But I will, if that’s the way it has to be

Shall I write you poetry?
What is it you need to see
That would make you want to know me?

You have an easy way
You take it all in stride
You love to laugh
You love to play
And I love being along for the ride

You’re better than me
I want to take credit
How does a parent resist
Looking at their amazing kid
And thinking
I had a lot to do with this?
But then I suppose
Parents would have to take credit, too
For all the stupid ****
Their kids do
Or don’t do
And so, my beautiful daughter
You being perfect
Is all from you

Those who have been conned
Will never admit
That’s how it be
And will really believe
The fool is me
And who knows
Maybe that is
The way it be

It’s refreshing to see you
Finally saying how you really feel
Because we knew it all along
You pretended superiority
Demanded it, even
And proved yourself to be
Inferior
Superior people
Don’t need to demand
To be recognized as superior
They just demonstrate what superiority is
Without caring to be recognized by
Less superior people
As such
Truly superior people are aspiring to
Recognition from their superiors
Not their subordinates

Do you have the time to listen to me whine
About nothing and everything all at once?
I am one of those
Melodramatic fools
Neurotic to the bone
No doubt about it
Sometimes I give myself the creeps
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps adding up
I think I'm cracking up
Am I just paranoid?
Or am I just ******?
I went to a shrink
To analyze my dreams
She says it's lack of *** that's bringing me down
I went to a *****
She said my life's a bore
So quit my whining 'cause it's bringing her down
Sometimes I give myself the creeps
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps adding up
I think I'm cracking up
Am I just paranoid?
Grasping to control
So I better hold on
Sometimes I give myself the creeps
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps adding up
I think I'm cracking up
Am I just paranoid?
Or am I just ******?

Poetry
For me
Is loving words and their fluidity
I can say the same thing
In ten different ways
Make up new words
Go into a craze
As long as it’s something
Others might feel
Those beloved words become real

He quoted Miss Piggy
It was the corniest thing I ever did see
But just call me Kermit
A frog who happens to love corn on the sow
Eating it
With only frog teeth
I don’t like to bite when I’m ******* my meat

Bringing it to ya
Boo
Something you never before knew
Me
The one and only
Never been seen
In the entirety of history
Until
Me
A golden rarity
Piece that fits so perfectly
Maybe
You will never know
Unless you try to see

Your apology
Sounds like
An alibi
On why
You shouldn’t feel sorry
And that answers a question
I used to wonder
If something could be less than worthless
Apparently, the answer is “yes.”

I finally met the
Day tripper
Lennon warned us about
He's all but invisible
Though
But he did make me
Twist and shout

Welcome to the water bottle parade
It is the new big thing
You, too,
Can be cool
Depending upon from what you drink
Does it have a straw
Or a cool liquid draw
And what happens if you drop it?
How ‘bout the handle
Is it the one finger hold
Or must you carry it in your palm?
And does it include a cool charm?
Is the color properly
Pleasing and bright
With the extra option to glow at night?
Is it Wi-Fi attached
And perfectly matched
To the rest of your dishes at home?
Does it have GPS
That you can somehow connect
To find it with your phone?  
Who cares how much water it holds
Or how long it will keep it cold?
Does it look cool
With all the brand new
Features for others to wish for?  
Water bottles are of little use
If all they can do is hold water and juice

While she lays sleeping
I stay out late at night and play my songs
And sometimes all the nights can be so long
And it's good when I finally make it home, all alone
While she lays dreaming
I try to get undressed without the light
And quietly she says, "How was your night?"
And I come to her and say
"It was all right, " and I hold her tight
And she believes in me
I'll never know just what she sees in me
I told her someday if she was my girl
I could change the world
With my little songs, I was wrong
But she has faith in me
And so I go on trying faithfully
And who knows maybe on some special night
If my song is right
I will find a way
Find a way
While she lays waiting
I stumble to the kitchen for a bite
Then I see my old guitar in the night
Just waiting for me like a secret friend
And there's no end while she lays crying
I fumble with a melody or two
And I'm torn between the things that I should do
And she says to wake her up when I am through
God, her love is true
And she believes in me
I'll never know just what she sees in me
I told her someday if she was my girl
I could change the world
With my little songs, I was wrong
But she has faith in me
And so I go on trying faithfully
And who knows maybe on some special night
If my song is right
I will find a way
While she waits
While she waits
For me

Our Mother
She keeps telling us
Opening sinkholes
Creating gusts
We continue endlessly
Work her bones
Milk her body
Mother will give
Maybe
But some mothers
Abandon a naughty baby

Spark of creation
Unvoiced
Forgotten
Creation
Like honey
Does not go rotten

A cry into the void
Whether it be warrior
Or defeated
Most often a lonely
Call
Of the proud
Either at high
Or low
Pure emotion
Into the void they go

Do you think we get all the answers in Heaven?  
Or does that only happen in Hell?

One day I am going to know what he smells like

Currently
I stay attached to thee
Perhaps because you let me be
You do not discourage me
Which I perceive optimistically
But it could be true
That you simply don’t care
Or you’re completely unaware
Or maybe I disgust you
What’s a girl supposed to do
With no idea what is true
And “could be”
Maybe
Vague and shady
Glimmers of crazy
When not a no
Perceived as a maybe

I can understand why our ancestors
Didn’t use their feet like hands
But that’s one thing I wish we had kept
On our journey from monkey to man

Excuse me,
Lady online
I’m playing Scrabble with
You are obviously not some mortal being
But a person who has ESP
Using your power
In scrabble to beat me
Or at least, throw me off of my game
Every time I’ve got the
Perfect move
You take my space
That I didn’t get the chance to take
And I appreciate that’s how you win the game, and beat the crowd
But psychic powers shouldn’t be allowed

I wanna be angry
And stomp my feet
Run into the street
And scream like a banshee
I wanna curse
Wish you the worst
Pray for you to feel the thirst
I wanna bring down the boom
Cast a spell so you see me in every moon
I wanna bring myself to you
Then turn and show you my back
I want you to yearn for me
As if I’m all you lack
I want to fill your senses
Till you cannot go without
You can be the teapot
And I will be the spout
I want to be the song
You whistle as you go along
And all who hear it pause
To hear the Pied Piper
And her cause
I want to be the horses and the men
Who put Humpty Dumpty together again
I want to be the plate you lick clean
Or even lick *****
You know what I mean
I want to be the mosquito
Piercing your skin
I want to be the air you’re breathing in
I want to sin and sin and sin
But we both know I ain’t getting in
Meanwhile you sit under my skin

It used to be
When he said the word “baby,”
I thought he was talking about me

Battered body
Stomach scars
Dry skin patches
Rogue hairs
Funky toenail
Callus feet
Yet
If I snuggle up to you
It’s a real treat.

Maybe I might
Have a crush on you
Except I don't pay attention
To half of the things you do

I miss the beautiful parts of you
Tender moments
And fresh air breaths
But you’ve got ugly parts, too
Angry, mean, and lots of mess
I can’t have one without the other
It’s just who you are
Uglier than beautiful
Unkind words bashing
In my skull
Pushing away against the pull
You can’t be what you are not
And I cannot be blind
I refuse to go through
Thickets of ugliness
To find a tiny field of kind

Your birthday passed about
Two months ago
And I’m just only now
Remembering it