Freedom isn’t Freedom when
we’re still fighting amongst ourselves
all because one race feels superior
& the others still fight for equality
to be seen as human & not animals

Freedom isn’t Freedom when
we’re divided by hatred & political beliefs
the past still being taught to the youth
by those who hold on failed objectives
that got us here in the beginning

Freedom isn’t Freedom when
certain sexualities are seen as a disgrace
in the eyes of those that follow religious practices
preaching “love thy neighbor” but the 1st to judge
as if we’re not God’s children on different paths

Freedom isn’t Freedom when
we’re still at war with inexcusable deaths
committed by bullies with badges who serve to protect
freedom will never be Free
even Peace comes with a Price

In the beginning, they ask you the same thing
all these empty promises that don’t mean a thing
Conversations about everybody that left them
but hope that you will accept them
heard the words “I love you” more than enough
confide in them because they’re the ones I can trust
but here’s the craziest part of all
they all left with me standing alone after helping them crawl
there was never any love, I was a stepping stool
investing real love like I always do cause I’m a fool
everybody isn’t the same, that’s what they say
but I see no differences just the same games they play
Granted, I’ve had my fair share of breaking hearts
situationships ending with me walking away, I played my part
but when I chose to love I was met with the same outcome
& people question why I always tend to doubt them
Love was always given out, way more than I gave myself
with my only regret being the lack of love for myself

I wish I knew what being perfect felt like
the ability to grab eyes when I walk in the room
I wish I was never forced to be the villain
I wish my present wasn’t so affected by my pasts’ opinions
I wish my dad actually cared enough to come around more
I wish my feelings weren’t so ignored

I wish the family I knew was the family that still exists
maybe I wouldn’t feel so alienated
I wish i still had the heart to repair what’s already gone
& return back to the home that my heart belongs
I wish i didn’t fear love so much & embraced it more
I wish I could give my life so my loved ones could live more

I often wake up in tears but can never explain it
I hate myself in every form & I hate it
sometimes I see myself on this mountain looking back
at everything that’s happened prior getting here
then ask myself, “Why am I still here?” when I feel incomplete
& the only time I vent is in my sleep causing me to cry endlessly
I feel like I’m by myself although I’m surrounded by love
but in the end, would they love me more if I wasn’t here
I bring joy to those I love to hide that I’m not okay
but they have enough on their plate so I remain silent
then at night when I close my eyes & drown in the waterfalls of my sorrows
I wanna be happy but happiness doesn’t come without sadness
& unfortunately, I’m trapped in a world that’s full of evil & madness
I could share my tears with one of my close friends
but who cares enough to keep me from putting this life to an end
I’ve been at war with my own mind since I was a kid
I keep looking for an escape but every turn is a dead end
& I’m tired of calling on alcohol & sleep aid as a friend
If only you knew how many times I’ve driven my fist into a wall
or how many times I’ve tried to consume more than 150 mgs of sleeping pills
still wishing for an overdose cause I don’t wanna wake up again
to face that demon in the mirror that I’ve called my friend
with the only thing stopping me is the pain it’ll cause my mother
can’t bring it to myself to hurt her way worse than the others

I used to think it was my biggest loss in the world
to lose the one person that brought me into this world
but going back to think about it, you're the loser here
for walking away from a blessing with the pain being severe
never mind the issues with you & my mom, I'm not apart of that
you owe me enough to guide me thru life but avoided that
I can't understand the idea of not raising my seed
grooming him perfectly to be fit respectfully as a king
with some lessons being better taught by men
"I gave birth to you so it's my job to help you win"
not a single birthday card or phone call to be sent
just that $80 a week on child support spent
you loss out on a miracle, a blessing to be exact
making him grow to disliking you, you gotta live with that
used to be sorry for being your son but it's not me
to tell a dad about his responsibilities
you created a monster that turned into a gem
that soon a monster & slowly becoming HIM
hope you're proud of me dad cause I made it
I now love the creation that spent my life hating

Stability, electric, & comfortability
with the candles lit along with R&B
the vibe you getting more close to me
but I don't need to take off clothes
kiss your lips or wrap your legs around me
Just need the sound of your voice
along with your trust instilled in me
with me sitting back allowing you to safely
be yourself, there's no catch with me
if you need to cry or laugh, feel free
it's the small things that I wanna see
the small things others don't get to see
that side of you that you only gift to me
the side of you that comes alive with me
the side of you that doesn't need me
but with my help, it becomes magic
you don't feel judged or backed in a corner
more like a friend with a lending shoulder
that vibe alone is the best of me
cause it's the best type of intimacy
the type of space where you feel safe with me
the type of space where you fall in love with me

It’s not about the *** or the love making but about the connection
when we share our love & get lost within the expression
just the idea of alone of sitting down without any interruptions
understanding one another to avoid any future dysfunction
we both want the same thing & both share the same passion
of bonding thru vibes, sharing tears of feelings, or even laughing
the closer I get to you, the more you make me feel
shocked with excitement with the peace that you don’t conceal
like I’m on top of the world with nothing else mattering much
with the electricity in the air lighting up the room even without a touch
it’s the smallest gestures that make the biggest impact
something that can’t be explained & can surely never be matched
for whether we talk throughout the night or just sit within the silence
with you, I can never feel like I’m off course cause you are my balance
Love, Peace, Comfortability, & butterflies is what we feel inside
but that’s what happens when 2 rare & unique souls collide