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It brings Sadness
leaves us confused
changing our approach
modifying our point of view

For most, it’s a fantasy
a feeling only present
when our eyes close
to grow old as one & raise a family

Go thru hell & craziness
wasting precious time
being broken
just to get to happiness

That’s what Love is
trails & tribulations
dead ends, lonely nights
live life alone holding grudges
every kiss I cherish

every hug I embrace

dwell every time we vibe

feeling butterflies all over

cause any second it'll be over

thoughts of you in every song

you're mine, that's where you belong

love for the moment cause forever ain't that long
I remember it so vividly me
the rage inside killing me
going to school every day
& at the end of each day, I would pray
ask God for the guidance
don’t have patience but I tried it
let everything go, enough is enough
everybody must die or ima give up
got home in the pm right around 3
before I hit the back door, found my uncles key
walked into his room looked in the closet
there goes the gun hiding in the darkness
I took it to my room & loaded it up
put it under my bed used my shoes to cover it up
next morning I wake up, wash up & head out
with the gun in my bag & the bus enroute
but 10mins before it pull up, I stopped & think
ima take my future then throw it down the sink
all I wanna do is ****, my fist hurts from the wall
punching it nonstop, guess I'm angry by default
on second thought I threw the gun in the ditch
before word gets out & my mom gets the switch
got ****** on my mind but couldn't fulfill it
blood painting the walls when I spill it
4 main targets that won't live to see 18
living out grand theft auto outside of my dreams
got to school but remained quiet while screaming
inside my head with the demon side scheming
on making a move to make them regret
messing with me with I dump led in their chest
waiting for a moment so I black out
destroy everything in sight, ima show you what this pain bout
alive or dead at the time it was worth the risk
but before either one, they'll remember me for this
when you're done blaming me

crying over or hating me

begging or persuading me

stressed over dating me

tried ******* saving me

but the pettiness was killing me

for the moment I was fortunate

but in love, we're total opposites

no hate but vibes are moderate

my departure hurts but you'll get over it
a decision was made
a path was paved
the future delayed
my heart wasn't saved

a chapter ended
a heart befriended
your love's suspended
the reason argumented

I admitted I'm wrong
couldn't string you along
to make you think we strong
together, we don't belong

hurt, you ain't the only one
too petty too long, we're done
forced me out, you won
you'll find another one
you appeared different
overtime you got distant
had me blushing
my heart you kept crushing
in pursuit of something
my goodies had you lusting
your soul had me trusting
every word you ever spoke
killed me & left me broke
you're a king, that's a joke
gained my heart but you choked
you're a different man, that's indeed
in your lies I believed
after all I told you
& you still chose to leave
My existence wasn't demanded
yet I was left stranded

nothing to do between you two
but I suffered because of you

grew up without your guidance
I'm hurt but remained silent

you forced the divorce
but made me feel like the source

for years I've taken the blame
feeling ashamed to have your name

not sorry I'll no longer be
the reason you'll always hate me
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