The norm is being with a man who doesn’t take you seriously
Plenty of women in my family have gone through struggle love
The norm to get your heart broken
“Guys do that”
It has become okay that they do us *****
It has become okay to curse them out over phone or text, with tears streaming down our faces
Why do we have to fight for them?
Why do we have to prove that we should be worthy to them?
The norm is being with a man who uses us for ***
The women in my family know all too well about a man who couldn’t give a **** about them
This **** is taking its course
Why should I wait around for him? Why should I give him the benefit of the doubt?
Why should I show him my vulnerability?
Knowing he'll take it for granted

This pain is passing through like kidney stones

I'm not my mistakes
Life hasn't treated me that well
But I forgive it

The words that you say to me breaks my heart
The only love that I wanted in this world was yours
What am I going to do now that you’ve broken my stem?
Can’t look at anybody else because mentally, I’m comparing them to you
Telling myself to let you go but how is that possible when I prepared myself for your love
I prepared myself to love you and be a completely different person
The way that you looked at me told me that this could last forever
Now I’m completely lost because what you did to me completely broke me
The only love that I wanted in this world was yours
What am I going to do now that you’ve broken my stem?

At ten, if I had proceeded with my plan
Would a violin play?
I keep telling myself I don’t like pain and I don’t want to die if it takes too slow
One day, the sun will consume earth
And when that time comes
Play me a violin
Play the instrument I wish to hear when I make my exit
Out of the respect of ten-year-old me who continued to suffer because she was afraid of being unsuccessful

I feel your pain before you express it
Cry your tears before your heart breaks
Guess this pain of yours is genetic
The look of disgust is not for you but for me
Telling my future self to not become my broken secrets
Not to become the skeletons that live in my closet
If this **** is genetic though, then how come you pretend that you don’t feel me?
The tears that I’ve cried in front you, you still looking at me like you’re confused
What do I have to do for my feelings to become genetic so you can feel my pain too?

The sorrows are getting old
I’m no longer recognizable
For years, I’ve been encouraging myself
Encouraging myself to bloom again
But it seems impossible
Days are becoming night
The warm is becoming cold
This deadheading session has been lingering
It’s been years since I’ve seen myself bloom
Bloom in a field of flowers
Flowers I used to hate but now trying to love