Always remember
When the loneliness breaks through
That to peer into the darkness
Is a gift from me to you

The dread is overwhelming
It eats into your soul
Infecting that tiny part of you
That is positive and whole

Don't be afraid of who you are
Your special cant you see
Complexity is your power
It connects you to me

Looking up to one another
Protecting each other
Standing strong together
Always and forever

Our words often deep
inside we both felt weak
Finding comfort in each other
My best friend and my brother

He recently spoke of a light
After singing loudly and bright
In gods holy place
Where a group of pensioners gave him faith

God bless my darling Sam
A most wonderful man
I’ll fight through this pain
Till I see you again

Xxxx

I am suddenly aware that my eyes are open, and have been for some time.
its dark, quiet.

The faint taste of ammonia, seeps into my mouth

I feel heavy and unable to move,
my body hasn't yet caught up.
Fear surrounds me.
I am not alone.

I am caught somewhere in between.....
The rules I follow - that keep me safe, and bound - are lost, purgatorio

I have glimpsed the operating system.

There is no need for remembering, rewinding. I am completely aware of every detail of the place .
A revisit.... A slap in the face of reality.

A visit back to a long forgotten place from many many years ago, suddenly completely clear... Back to where I left off.

These r the ones that pull me down. , my mind free from creating and ready to explore... Let the games begin.

I need the fade out, the short but so
Important time it takes to move from dream to reality.... to give your mind time to adjust, slow down.

This isn't how it is supposed to be.
The fear is becoming intense, I need water to get rid of that taste, that place. To knock me back. But I can't move.

A beautiful moment

              Behind
                                the
                                       corner
                             lies.....

A perfect little package

Waiting for your eyes

The way you stick out your tongue when you concentrate
The way our bodies fit so perfectly
Watching match of the day on a sat night
Knowing all of your songs and playing them endlessly
Watching our son become the best parts of you and me
Telling you my dreams before they are lost to me
Watching scify movies
Battling egos
One day you'll see
You and me
Fit perfectly

Chinese greens
Some salt and pepper Beans
Noodles with beansprouts please
Never rice with a Chinese


Crispy chilli beef
Sweet and Sticky on my teeth
Chicken on a stick
Don't forget the sauce with a kick

I'll pick it up
So it's crispy and hot
Can you add it up
So I know what's what

Happy new year
Whatever that means
A day hasn't changed
yesterday's dreams

..............I want to be Guinevere, I want Lancelot, I want a magician and a pack of wolves. I want a wardrobe and a door and a trip to the moon......

Lovely little lies
Are never ever wise
Honesty I honour thee!
............Eventually

How can you **** all night on a broken bed?
This jealousy is taking over my head
Can't stop punching that ******* face
Watching blood spray allover the place

How can you ****  all night on a broken bed?
While I was home filled with dread
You told me we'd try augain
After we fxcked at 10am

You'd left by mid day
I smiled and kissed where you'd lay
But by the time darkness came
You'd fxcked her again

While I cried down the phone
Confused and all alone
You offered her protection
not from getting her pregnant

How can you **** all night on a broken bed?

Once around the merry go round
Probably you’ll survive
One more time for fun and games
You’re chances are cut in half

Again, again faster and faster
You’ve already lost the prize
Time falls away lost in array
Merrily made you cry

Once around the merry go round
Probably passed you by
Once more you hit the floor
Chances are you’ll die

I'm obsessing about the routine, the organised systems I have created... It's better this way, where normal is.

Everything must be in its place. Nice and tidy. 99.9 % Organised. With a lemony scent. Where normal is.

Don't let the crazy out. Stuff it back in and tape it up! Don't listen to her words..quickly, Polish the foot stall....Where normal is.

Organised crime. Boring monotonous 2.4 success. Baptised and believed. suffocating, devouring, digesting...
Where normal is?

I am me
quite complex you'll see
I love astronomy
Literature
Preraphilite art
My life is bound by maths
And it's connection with all we are

I like sweets, multicoloured and hard
Organised Surrealist sm  
The queen of cups in Tarot cards
I dream of vampire queens
Lemon eye Lopez
A sorcerer poisoned by his urchin planet

my utopian landscape, I've been there only twice
Where I will one day meet Hera
And play with people's lives

I love surreal Japanese literature
Arthur c clerk and theoretical science
Ray bradburys beauty of the future
Rules are what I despise

Preferring James Herbert to Chaucer and bronte
Iliads brutality to odysseys charm
discovering a book by its cover
And enjoying it
I love the power of pr

I can list the books in order
That changed my life forever
You don't need to study English
It doesn't matter who you are

I started my life late at 34
Falling inlove with the gift from God
Discovering my faults created poetry
Capturing beauty beneath our stars

I am neither this nor that
But I am loyal to the core
If you are hurt I won't stop
till They are destroyed
.....I care not what started your war

Turning my control into a way to exist
I am organised to the point of a facist
If you bark I will bite
Then poison you with vultures plite

I can be tamed
Become the perfect wife
But only if you love
Everything about my life

One day when you search
Above the surface
You will see
I am me
And me
I am not

fairies are fading
treasure chests echoing
Dreams become noise
magic closes its doors

Rainbows lose form
Psychic tendencies withdraw
Death passes me by
I no Longer can fly

wormholes hide their law
time travel closes it's door
Perseus changes his mind
Leaving medusa behind


The powerful Po poisoned
Electric Darkness disinfected
Curious Chaos curated

magnolia horizon

Now is the present, a present I choose to ignore.
For The moment you are aware of now
it immediately becomes the before.
Ahead is now happening, while contemplating the before. So if now is before and ahead is now you can see why I choose to ignore.

Not often
very rarely
That moment of surprising content
No reason for its arrival
Appearing when I least expect

I am only just aware
Before she digs her claws within
Venomous and vicious
****** and tainted with death

The vulture within me

Today you broke me
I crumbled down
I fell beneath your sword

No part of me defended
You attacked me to the core

Tomorrow I will stand
Strong and proud
I will not lay down so easily

For the route you took
Won't break me twice
I have faced and sealed the door