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Jayme Jul 2018
Nothing is vibrant, nothing is fun,
Everything interesting has already been done,
I could go for a run, maybe learn a new stunt,
But that takes motivation and of that I have none.
  
I could try to socialize, maybe converse,
But every time I come by the crowd seems to disperse,
Time used to fly by and yet that rule no longer applies,
All I can do is lie in bed and try.
  
I try to come up with something to do,
And yet I cannot think of anything new,
All I can do is admire the view,
I can't even go to the zoo.
  
Everything interesting has already been done,
I could go for a run, maybe learn a new stunt,
But that takes motivation and of that I have none,
Nothing is vibrant, nothing is fun,
Everything interesting has already been done.
Jayme Sep 2018
"But I love you!" She cried as he walked away,
The lies she wore like a skin had lost their sway.
All the twisted tales she'd spun,
All the stories she'd told come undone.
Now all that was left was this one small claim,
This claim that her love for him was what's to blame.
He laughed at her supposed despair,
Their twisted relationship was now beyond repair.
He had believed those splendid tales she'd wove,
She had grown attached to her lying trove.
She hid behind her lies like shields,
They betrayed her and weakened the truth they concealed.
They hurt her and deemed her untrusted,
The truth she hid grew more and more rusted.
Until "I love you" was the only phrase she trusted.
Jayme Jul 2018
Do you believe in love?
Love, the feeling of unending happiness deep inside you?
Love, the joy that motivates us to live?
Love, the spark of life in your eyes as you smile and laugh?
Love, the warmth of your soul on a cold winter night?
Love, the happiness you feel when people around you succeed?
Love, the pain and heartbreak, sorrow and loss
Love, the healing and and gaining, relief and aid
Do you believe in love?
Because I believe in love.
Jayme Sep 2018
English is useless,
This homework is ruthless.
My mind is a mess,
And yet I have to do this test.
It's hurting my brain,
And causing my eyes to strain.
It's some sort of comprehension on dancers,
Yet I don't know any of the answers.
These questions are bogus,
I need to refocus.
Refocus on what?
(I do actually like english I was just rather annoyed with an assignment when I wrote this)
Jayme Sep 2018
Keep smiling , I think as I walk past yet another happy family, joyous and laughing
Keep smiling, I whisper  as shadows dance around me , street lamps flickering
Keep smiling, I say as tears flood down my face like rivers,
Keep smiling, I sob as my thoughts weigh down upon me like boulders
Keep smiling, I mumble as I stumble  through the street, the silence loud
Keep smiling, I frown as I stand on the ledge, the rocks below me sharp
Keep smiling.
Keep smiling.
Keep smiling.
What if I can’t keep smiling?
What if I can’t keep going?
But I can, I can keep smiling, because I smile as I face the only thing left for me,
I can keep smiling, I think, as I jump.
This is a poem I wrote for class a while ago!
Jayme Sep 2018
Oh the monsters in my head,
Why do they want me dead?
They sneak and weave into my head,
Their mission always to deceive, to hurt and shred.
All I want is a reprieve oh, but the monsters in my head,
All they want is for me to wind up dead.

What if the monsters achieved their goal?
Would anyone even care at all?
Would anyone notice the plain girl now gone?
Would anyone notice when she was already so withdrawn?

No. 

No because nobody knows what she has undergone,
Nobody knows why she is so withdrawn.
Nobody knows why the monsters in her head,
Why the monsters so badly want her dead.

Nobody knows.
Jayme Jul 2018
Pacing back and fourth
Hands are sweaty
Feeling unsteady
Mind's not ready
What aren't I ready for?
Feeling things?
Not having to fake a smile?
Being genuinely happy?
No, I'm ready for all of those things,
Been ready and waiting for a while.
It's something more,
Something bigger.
And so as I sit here,
pacing back and forth in my mind
I realize what I'm not ready for
I'm not ready to live
All this time I haven't been living
Sure, I've been surviving
Sure, I've been existing
But never truly living,
I am not ready to live.

— The End —