Standing in the middle of yesterday
when it all went wrong
and I made mistakes
stuck in my same dull ways
some old some frayed
the same things to do
it seems the same day
sitting in my room
sinking in this box
allowing no others in
behind these locks
blaming myself for being
like somebody else
the candle burns down
so i watch as it melts
for reasons unknown
I can not find today
I'll stay inside
because I am afraid......

In my own World
back to a calm place
thing go so fast
my hearts in a race
with all of my thoughts
their not at ease
wanting more drugs
I love how they tease
slipping out of place
feeling of spent
spending my days
forever and bent
pulled so far down
I can't find my soul
this rage taking over
til I lose self control
this life that I live
It's not the same
when the mixture is right
I'll go insane
just a bit more
a poke to engage
but it's been way to much fun
while feeling this Strange.....

When desperate people
use their simple minds
only to open their
free flowing mouths
talking **** about
people and things
that they know nothing about
their words arouse suspicions
with unreasonable doubts
ears overhear the words
that sound so absurd
spread it to others
and the rest of the herd
in the memories of the stupid
they rattle their lips
they give up other people
with their devilish gift
put under pressure
with no reason to bark
but some care less about others
they must be the narc.......

I can honestly say
I am glad you are gone
you were never true
you left like the others
all left me so blue
you move on to the next
left my heart in arrest
and my mind so oppressed
I guess I was good for awhile
as long as I live in denial
with him in you hand
you walk with a smile
you never said you would leave
stayed around to deceive
now I'm rid of you
and now I reap the relief,.....

Here it comes again
there is no one left here
to hurt me, but me
alone inside my head
I walk along the ledge
thoughts never to be said
to me their all pretend
I'm twisted, spun within
wear a self degrading grin
it's all happening again
remain downcast til the end...

As I am losing control
I go for broke
throughout the madness
and begining to choke

Alive in my mind
I can't speak for myself
spent half of my life
I've spent it in Hell

Slipping farther away
into the void
you hi-jack my thoughts
with your crippling noise

You hinder my motives
making my choices
I am feeling naked within
and avoiding the voices

While I'm tripping all over
I shake and I shudder
your still alive in my mind
this pain hurts and I suffer

Your keeping me down
I can't gain any ground
I can't speak for myself
I'm just broken and frowned.....

I lose it everyday
somewhat different
but always the same
as strange as this sound
forever up, never down
it's a scared place to be
a walk inside of me
the mania never stops
this moods complex plots
like I'm yelling at me
with breath ******* in knots
being unable to scream
your grips to extreme
being host to your cause
you have left me so lost
as your castaway
I lie and I waste...