Some days I wish he was you,
You were the one I hardly knew.
We spent a summer growing,
Affection there but barely showing.
I grew to miss you more every day,
Cursing my misfortune as you went away.
On certain days I swear he could be you,
Though I know it could never be true.
Now I see that our short love was grim,
Because on some days I wished that you were him.

You sang for me when we were in love,
Or so I believed you were capable of.
Now your song is no more than ghost,
It feeds off of me still; a reluctant host.
As you faded away it held me still,
Whirling me around til I became ill.
And now that I've moved on it protects,
It holds tight to me and all of my regrets.
Your song whispers to me on the occasion,
It bleeds into my head at night, a beautiful lesion.
Back when your mouth yielded such love
You took pieces of my heart, donning the surgeons glove.
I believed that like your song you were true,
Now I know that this parasite is what was always you.
Just a pretty song played out through a phone,
When I was desperate, sad and so alone.
Though your melody hurts like an imaginary bruise,
You are no longer my love or my muse.

Nights like these
I lie awake.
The thoughts breaking in
More than I can take.
Who have I become?
Have I changed?
The mirror is someone new
Someone deranged.
I've lost all the friends I had,
Pushed away by fear.
Now I'm all alone in the dark,
All alone down here.
Nights like these
I can't sleep.
Haunted by the nightmares
Of demons I keep.
The shadows dance
Ghosts on the wall.
I am taken by them,
Lost in it all.
Nights like these
I wish for an easy end.
A noose around the neck,
An awkward bend.
But I'll tell myself
Life is not an ease.
I'll stay brave
On nights like these.

For you I fell,
Passed my fate to the hands
Down a well.
I shed my skin,
Bared my muscles
Bone and tendon.
My affection a pit,
A place for you to ****
Spread your grit.
For you I had leapt
Straight from the safety of home
Took my last breath.
For me you pushed,
A little shove and turned
As I mushed.

I'll watch you burn
Consumed by flames
Without a name.
I won't make a sound
Move  single muscle
Raise a finger.
You built this fate for yourself
You poured gasoline
Set the flame.

I am more than just regurgitated knowledge.
I am more than a statistic.
I am more than just a book worm.
I am more than a nerd.
I am more than just a tough little girl.
I am more than a rebel.
I am more than just the clothes I wear.
I am more than makeup on a face.
I am more than just my father's daughter.
I am more than a sister.
I am more than just a face in the morning.
I am more than a lover.
I am more than just someone.
I am more than nothing.
I
AM
MORE.

Your fear was a beast,
It consumed you whole as you stood.
Tearing out from your chest
It ejected words like bile.
"This is the end of us,
Feel the pulse of death,
Maggots wriggle for your soul,
This... is.... the end!"
Sickly sweet it stuck to my face,
Sour and rancid and terrible.
Your fear poured out from inside
A gaping hole that spilled red.
Your fear was a beast,
That consumed you whole as I watched.