Frailty.......
I fear the fickleness
Within this entitlement
Based society.
Where in
I fail to see .....
The heart of This lion they lay claim too
Be?
Maybe ..........
This is only a thought....
Usage is in the eye of the
Depictor
where as terminology would follow function .
At this unction
You should see ........
A paradigm shift.....
In the way with which the word is used .... Its not what they say they are .
It's what they say they do......
Actually kinda cute ......
In a sad way.....

Songs......
that haven't been.
sung....
Times......
Wantingly walking right into .....
What ........
I should have run.....
From ......  
Wrongs done...
So .......
Um ....
I guess
I wander into the furthest recesses .
To the precipice
Of the horizons of my mind .......
Find .......
Right ..
Wrong....There is no act that can undo the fact
That .........
There is no view that isn't slightly askew.
I feel like someone's writing a book of my life that can't be read
Untill.....
I'm dead.
And they are waiting impatiently
For..  ...
Me ....
Too
Move.....
I'm unsure
About whether I do ..... Or don't want to move.......
Who will remember or
Or want to care ....... Or not to .....
If I do ...
Hoorays for me
And boo
From the rest.

Lab coat ....
Bench tops....
Floor,cabinets,
Pretty much everything is all white....
Except me ......
Bunsen burners
beakers,
Test tubes
Full of emotions,
Boiling .
Vamping off clues......
Of what is it?
Which drives me to be so bendable.
The subject ......
Timid, me.....
Lab Rat.
Find me lost in a maze or running
On the wheel.
In the cage.




Not really too.....
Anything,but maybe away
From
Something



Chemistry.......
Charts and
graphs
Elementary ....
Wall coverings
Crows feet.......
Deepening
Control group
Doin they're thing......
OH!
Here we go.
Controlling.....
Keep going ....
Please......
Keep my head down ......
Keep going .....
Please ....
Don't see me...
Oh ****.....
Hey ........
Whatchadoin?

Waiting here for you to come by and ruin my day .....
Is what I wanted to say.....
But didn't......
Smoke......
somethings.....
Burning internally.
Feeling sorta
In different....
Like madness
Has separated
Me...
Id.......
Me ....
Mamamama
My persona.....

Steeped in a white hot Seether.....
Could neither
Diffuse nor compromise...
Trepidation.....
Not  for persona  sake....
Panic.......
For the opponents.....
Being forewarned....
Chose ignorance.....
Ignoring
The desperate
Overtly obvious
Warning
Signs.....
⚠️
At the apex of max capacity.
two choices.
Guilt could expand the space
Where swallowed pride sits...
at the price of homicide....
Although
Tempting ...
Instead.....
Devise a compromise ...
Inspired  by both sides
And this fault line
Left from
A life time trying to be kind....
Meanwhile
Transparent
Perpetrators
Beguiling
......
Smil­ing overpitty-ing,
Drawing the focus away
From themselves passing the shame  
Character bashing
My friendemies,
For exactly .....
Precisely the
same thing they are doing
Saying sternly
HEY  !!!!!!!!!!?
Don't you go & let them talk you into anything .
Look at me
You don't owe them a thing....
I mean it ....."
As I listen to these wealthy friends telling me they feel so bad for me ....
And there so sad cause they wish they could pay me
But right now
Can only give me a couple bucks .....but in two weeks come on back
& They'll settle up......
Then they don't...
Stoke the fire
Start woofin
The bellows
Flames darker ...and rising
This is it .....indecisive decisions on which side of the schism to give or not to give in .......
A raging torrent is oxidizing
Standing on the fence line
I'm the accelerant....
The sparks the flames the maddening magnesium
The wind uprooting trees and burning them
Woofin big time ******* in oxygen .....
Like a constant burst that don't end .
So brightening

Suns faded out ...
And now it's darkening
As my psyche
Deviding

Split ......
id good ....
Id bad .....
Strange !.?.!.....
Very .......
News to me...
There is someone around here.....
Apperantly ....that looks just like me ...
Cause that's not like ????
I need hard evidence and need to be convinced
Without which ....
Recollection.....
Won't set in .....
Bewildering ...
If and when ...
I remember the checanery and shenanigans
I have allegedly done...
There comes this this image ..
Me now ...
At a good distance behind
"The" age 7 me... .
secretly watching ....
In the back yard    
Of the home predating
That age.....
At dawn...
And the warmth of the sun in my face and the fog
Dissipating
"In front"  me
Above the sunken marsh in view of the slough
And secretive
Personal trail
no one but me knew through
Those cattails
I loved so much....and my favorite carrion the red winged blackbird singing .....
Not a thought or care in the world
Taking a good healthy breath.
The overwhelming
Sensation of a satisfying grin begining to unfurl
Turning into a gratifying smile.

Future, memory.......
Purchase made........
With priceless
Currency paid......
Most recent event
With or without  
Intention,
Time spent
Is how you bought what is
Now you're newest memory
So riddle this altruism.
If you willst
"It's an elementary fact that a thief is by default
A liar .......   "
so then
Whomsoever
Should say they lie not maketh themselves liars.......
Does this mean we are all unconsciously thieves?
The consequence's
We're recompensed  come from untruths we've sold to the purchaser.
Who unaware wasted their time in thought non existent paradigm .
Rendering  the recipients victims and you should be convicted
To make  active conscious decisions in creating future memories which you will be comfortable in.cause those who don't.

F
I
N

Emotional deflections
And refracting
With overt reactions ..
These things are not new to me......
What's new to me is in recognizing times when I'm doing these things.

Time .................
Quantifieable....
Changes every thing .
Created with mankind in mind,
Yet  blind to our needs
The advent simultaneously
Self Incorporated synergistically,
Integrated instantly
Secret allotment ,never know the amount ....
Time, sacred,precious ...to us it's tempral,
To the animal kingdom
It exists on a whole different level
Essential component of "THEE"
TRICHOTOMY "
SPACE
TIME
MATTER
no space ?
No place for us ..
No matter?
Its what were made of.
So if we only had space to move about and matter to exist
It actually wouldn't matter ,
No time to do anything .
Appears we need all three
In order for existence to exist.
Would you believe time is part of mass conspiracy ??????
Well think on this gravity affects mass .with no solid form in its way
Would continually fall or be falling .....well as the world turns
We along with it are always falling horizontally  ......
So we set values to archive events
So in essence time ............. Is it real or
just another form of gravity a constant dilation
in continuum
Blessing or curse
Debatable
Contingent upon vantage I guess.
Could be both
Although  somewhat manageable.
Entombed chaos....
Still seems to be a luck of the draw
A sundry of descriptive adjectives,which one is
applicable ?


Perspective is objective
So at the same" time "
becomes
Both Collectively and personable thus  divisible and multidimensional  

Individually indefinite document
Recorded twice
Once when confusing  lucidity saunters in ,
second at existence end.
"Time" is the quintessential
Determinate!
........
Solitary
I feel a burgeoning affinity for,
  .... A lore
An anomaly ,
In perpetual inflation ,
Unpurchaseable yet it's spent
Plus it's what we do with it
That helps us to see what's in store.
Sporadic  
Fickle and far in-between
Froward looking
I can see scheduling
Orientation like a quantum
Combination lock code aligning
I get giddy in organizing
And arranging to maximize
Some for free........
A ransom fit for a king.
To be continued in deux time.

All the worlds a stage !
And idinnint just so swelligent..
Maintaining the Machiavellian
Masquerade
No one can see inside
Your encaged like a rat
Eluding the fact that
Everything is irrelevant
Except what makes you well again.

So subtle the muse you use  
Controls the illusion your caught up in.
deflection reflects whether falling out or in.


Falling out .....
Not good ....
Gloomy brooding mist . ....
Songs sung in cerulean hues,
Dark
delusion.
Unamusing ruse....
You can't move .......
Yet you run
night and day
You run
Chasing the same that you run from.
The only fix is to fall back in.
Then your own
Alchemist magicaly moves in mixing chemical intoxicating ....
Concoctions
And traumaus forgotten.
Along with the days

Living numb
succumb
inflicted and infected
Subjected to indignities
Playing into someone's vindictive games....
Which came from another
So now you get the pleasure
Spiked with pain .........
Its a sensation
Like watching your love
Still in loving they're
Ex lovers
They can do no wrong ....
You can do no right......
Oh but you do .....
And they do too......
And since you're there
You get to drink the shame.....
Feel the blame course
Through your veins.
And you stay
And after it's all gone away.
You stay ......
And wait . ....
Swimming with sharks
In hopes of falling back in .. ........
..................FIN.


These trials and tribulations
I find myself in
Come directly from my addiction....
I love .. ......
That's just me.......
I'm in,
everything goes from,
Dark cerulean to
Glowing vermillion

Decisions are choices I feel forced to ,.....
And would  rather not make.
A life time in deliberating such things
I believe
Mistakes within Living
This way are
abundant and without effort made,




Decisions .    . . ..
Choices laying in wait
Grief in either way .
In procrastination
Facetious freedom.
Half I hope they may fade away
Other half in invention and rehearsed.
Solutions of elusive excuses.
As the space in my mind
Depleting .
For fleeting moments
I sleep uneasily ......
Awake I sojourn .
Forlorn and frozen ..
From the decision  of avoiding
Choices
In decisiveness tax higher than
Chosen opportunities
And what sweet liberation
In meeting the enemy
Instantly.
Never underestimating
How serious .
Focus
No victory is ever satisfactory,
Without a worthy advisory
Delton Peele .



Each one compounds
All of these

In the very heart
Lies,
Confluence
A plethora of angularity
What I think I see
Who I want to be
What I know to be
Do I exist .
Am I missing something.
I dont understand
And
A long list of unmentionables
Mixing and mingling
Outward flowing
Incongruous streams
Untill feeding the persona
What some think of me
Honestly it's no where near who I think I am

As the centrifuge slowly decelerating
Natural elements degrading
Momentum
A cold wet cloud of epic depth
Filled to the brim
Dankly setting in ...
I step of the ride ....
My shirt and skin thin.
I feel pasty and grey
I look toward my investments
None of them stayed
When they pretended to be my friends
meant they would be there for me only till the good times went away .
And as all dissolves
Pools beneath me
In a caustic solution
A dark maelstrome made.
Causing perspective to fade
Leaching from me
Objective,
Without objective
No directive
No directive
No will .
No want
I will live
I shall over come
Re-evolve
Come back bigger
Better more beautifull
Than ever...
And all together hotter..
But beware to those who said they'd be there.
I didn't need anything from you
Just company.
If you are anywhere near me
Wear a sweater  ...
The cold coming from
Me is gonna be a killa...
And maybe you should
Invest in a bullet proof vest....
Just sayin

Augment  into abstract view
For verily I say unto you
your intentions
Are merely inventions
Meant to be mentioned
And within each conversation
Is underlieing back bitting
Your path  froward is shorter than the one behind you
And repercussion is multiplied
With compound interest  
Its eminent
The recompense immence
Since you want to pretend
you don't know this
Frolic on the gallo's
Knowing what you say
You hear I do.
Is not germain to what pertains to you . .
My business
Believe me,it's so not cooth,
And shall  not behoove you
to be a monger of untruths.
Your public attempts making amends...is just disgusting
Furthermore fake
For humanity sake
I try to wipe the slate blank
Sometimes I regret saying I forgive and forget cause the minute I do
The script is flipt
Suddenly the faulty things done deliberately ,
Are done by me ?
To you?
Blood boiling cringe worthy
Insanity
As if the first cut wasn't enough
No you feel the need to send me to oblivion
Bend reality convince everyone
I'm the one .  
No ..... I'm not this !
And even though,
I know you and your tactics
Even so I still get ****** .
And people who know me
Telling me they don't think it's cool of me keep bringing it up..
Wow  !
*** is really going on ...
Now I'm not gonna do what you think I'm gonna do ....
What your trying to make do
And freak the .... out
Let's just talk it out
And discuss events
With evidence
In dissolution I lie,
With  myself .
With you there is no solution
You want absolution without admission.
And from me .
In addition my submission?
Absolve you from where?
Here ?
Preponderance !
I say tactfully
Prior to your entrance .
In fact I was there.
Feeling rather content.
And then  in with you came
The rain of condescension,
Apparently this is you
And I brimming the drain..
Resolve not to devolve in your game.    
To self elevate by means
Of falsely delegating blame?
Your words picked so precisely
***** concisely my known injuries ,
Quite elegant I might add
And yet have not a clue
what you say and about who
Just as sweetly and swiftly
Betray you
Backed with slinging shame,
In little pieces with perfect company,
Things which at the time seem
to petty argue.
No I would rather stay down here.
Because my dear .
I can see you are too high and
Mighty
And have instilled in me a fear of heights
And more severe is
The fear of staying up there with you
I might become someone like you.
I wish I could say farewell
But the hell of it is
I still love you inspite of what you do.
And probably painfully will till
The day I die.!

If I said I was a liar........
Inwardly your thinkin duh ...
Outwardly your eyes dart down
To the left bend the corners of your mouth into a over  exaggerated frown
Then open palms
Shrugging shoulders wagging
Gesturing a response which reads no!
You say "I don't know.. .."
I say ok .......?
I guess that make two of us?

A Colluded illusion
Ilicitng indecisive decisions
Which side of the schism
Is your tomb in....?
Skrrrt!
Would it behoove you to know
It doesn't really matter?
Should we unify begin to solidify?
Love would mend and strengthin.
Ya that's gonna happen ......
See how sarcastic
Splatter the screen with blood
C'mon traumatize me.....
Let me hear the catastrophic
Story ... ..
No not that one
No I'm craving something to enrage me .......
****** mayhem religion ,racism
Not the money *** and drugs
Let's glorify that on the silver screen
That way the kids can see who we want them to be
We'll watch it with em
Maybe even vicariously...
Isn't it hilarious  
How we show them how to be so cool.
Then say
HEY *** .......?
why you acting this way
Don't be what we say
We don't portray?
Plus I'm doing everything I can to raise you......
Rieeeet?
So I'ma take it easy
But you better turn out better than me
Even though you think you have the right to run your neck and disrespect me...don't think
That alone makes you a better person than me ......
See what I mean .
Anybody can say that everything seems to be against me......
I'm live in a state of static
Lcd  stereophonic 10000 watt.
Amp 20 inch woofs
24 inch blades
12 gauge
***** my ears fill me with worry hate fear........
Put me in the cage keep me chained
Don't let me loose keep me tuned in......
The venom is ready
The needles pop then slide in
One for each eye and one for each ear
To controll what we hear
And manipulate our vision.
Augment reality
They watch us continually

we react
they keep pushing it in
The  spastic chatter
Spit by mad hatters and creating haters and division the say they're doin everything they can to protect us .........
***......from who?
Us or you .....



Its just another plastic prescription from spin doctors
Keeping us posted...........up
"This just in"
We interrupt this movement
With another social injustice
Because honestly when the
People get quiet
We get nervous
Better shake em up
So the dont wake up.

Can this really be a conscious
collective conspiracy


Flooding my psyche with ideas that I'll never be free

I'm sorry poetry
It seems like I only write you
When I have to!

If I had the full power of the potential I've bottled up inside
Over the years of swallowing my pride and putting my angers aside.....with all the pains
Fears and tears .
Dark lonely days walking home in the rain..loves lost or takin away.....all of it...
all of it all at once ...in a pill
I'd take it ......and then
I would stand like a giant
With all that power
Could you imagine?
And I would walk to 7-11
I would demand a free slurpy.
Instead I would get laughed at
.... probably
And I would not receive a free slurpee.......
Because no one will remember any of these sufferings.
Not the way it was felt by you...
And no one's gonna apologize
Not the way you need them to.
Nothing you have suffered through will elevate you ...sorry
If it were true
I would have died from diabetes
With a coke and banana slurpee
A long long long time ago

Like always in love I fall too deeply
Ive never been needy
But it seems
I have lost "me"
Somewhere in what we used to be.
Can you help me ?
Cause I can't remember me.....
I feel like I'm just a part of you that fell off .
...ewe .....
That's not me....

Uhhhm.....
It is what it is .......
Untill it was ....
But I really can't say
It always was ......but I do know
It was is before it was ....
Was...
And I can't garauntee it will always be........uhhhm
Is or was or will or could or would or can or even should
How could I?

longing so drastically
Falling weightless in an
Epidemic sea of need
Flaunting a panacea
Brings me insanity.
We text about  ...  all night
I dream about them all day.
They're want drives me crazy
Consequences don't faze me
And it's my want to give away
That drives them away
I'm haunted and I
clutched my life
The trauma too much
Meanwhile practicing with my lovers from days gone wrong....
Paralytic .
The static of staying still.....

Love lingeres so perfectly
Dangling innocently within my grasp
Just ... ....
Out of reach

Anonymous compliments
increases
Confidence which evidence suggests magnifies
Countenance
And this mixed with immaturity
Can lead to pseudo self reliances
Commonly Causing impedance
Within the learning process
And this is when the past is mingled with pride  
Leading naturally into arrogance...
This is when this magic immunity sets in and allowing this mixed  up false hope egotistical
Maniac a license to be
the boss with full stupidities.....
(Sorry that's suppose to read
Impunities...)!

All I could do is cry..
I wanted your love so bad
I felt like I would die....
I couldn't get it ...
I tried so hard ....
Thats why I think it  left me so scarred .......
Cause all I did was try......

Picture me .....
In parody.
Promise me
You won't let me
Let you get confused..
Because I can see
How someone
Could be
I mean with me .
Oh well sorry
Sorta too late....
I guess welcome to my
Cartoon...
Kinda funny isn't it.
I mean me and you....
Maybe it's just me.....

The only evidence known to exist
Is locked in the midst of my psyche............
And f.y.i.......
I'm in culpable remiss on this
And anyway it's strictly here say
At least that's what I'm told .
But don't quote me on that!
K ?
So you want to ask me another question?
Wait !
can you ask me a question without asking me a question?

Russian roulette ...... perfectly fine ....
In fact play it at night on the freeway.....
On foot dressed in black....
But so help me
Don't you dare hang around
Anybody who hasn't been shot yet.......
Cause this vaccine is meant to keep us safe
As long as we aren't" exposed "
To it........
So we can protect"
Those who can't take the shot..".
We feel sorry for them
But not the ones who won't get it.

Ca

Poetry?
What a journey !
Huh?!?
hasn't it been?
Listen my friend
Its not right
Left too many wrongs
To mend
There's been a few
Even back then I knew
I was right
But willing to bend rather than fight
And I know I shouldn't have been
And .....
Over the years I written you
Metaphorically and somehow
You have always helped me to
Understand me .
Sadly.....the hourglass has been broken
So our time has been shortened
I want to write beautiful
All I can say is.....
Thank you and I'm sorry...
Its too dark for me
To see
To write
Poetry
I love you.......
To be ..........?

I may laugh at you
Doesn't mean I want to
An its not cause o your misfortune.
What does is your jumped up joco monkey fit.
And you so in disbelief screaming
"I KNEW THIS WAS GONNA HAPPEN..!"
well if that's true then why you so ****** man?

1253  lie awake  
Hear the  dry mechanisms
In the clock searching desperately
For any distracting thoughts
Tictictictictic tic tic  tic  tic .  .  .  . . . ......
Finally !....gravity!
compensations mathmatical
Calculations with variables!
This rythm fluctuation in timing
I had thought maybe
I was imagining....I'm not!
It's real in fact perfectly predictable  ....  
its not intermittent
or some symptom
of mechanical failure
The tic of the clock speeding
Then slowing its not the batteries or something discrepant in the machining....
Its so simple  ....
The weight of the second hand being the longest is pulled by gravity.........
so as it hits the six you can hear a lul in the ticking as if it were dangling without tensioning on the gearing
Then you hear slow struggling up to the twelve .
Where it sorta teeters then speeds sounds like it's trying to hold back the sands of time
Time... .
Time..............
h no ......no...please
Let me sleep,
Here comes the wave again
Pain full perfect memory
The clear and present danger
I know is immenment
The discovery ....
They'll see I've been pretending
To be innocent
And my biggest fear
My most mind breaking soul shattering life ending fear.....
Is they will think
I had taken pleasure in
Getting away with it...
So I relive it ...
I transfer myself into the ones who hurt the worst
Become them and absorb the worst case scenario
Over and over......
I lay awake ....
I live the humility of being ...
In the .....
I know I'm guilty wether I'm caught or not.......
I'm not trying to get away with anything .....
I just don't want to get caught...
Suddenly ....
The door slams like at the end of ironsides.....as the footsteps echoing down the hall ...
Louder aproaching
I see a big green question mark
Teetering and ticking above my pursuant....
Ohh no here it comes again
BAM BAM BAM.
this is it
My day of reckoning
Should I run .....
The door is opening

In the orange and red glow
Locked behind iron clad gates
Of no one will ever know
Let the heat from the fire caress you cool shimmering minty tassels of silk
In feverish bliss
A soft wet kiss
Give inhabition to remiss
Give in to this
Let the sounds of pleasures
Lift and set you adrift
honey dew drips from lips
Pulsate with pastel vibrance
Purple to yellow
Slowly set down
Into satin and sweet rest as my voice echoes
I got this

I love you

Your mission ???????
You can't handle.
You wanna try ????
Uuugh    ohhhhhhhh K
So there's a place
Takes no space yet it's real
You can't feel it directly
You can see it digitally !
Allagorically...
The concept will elict difficulties
Set aside ample time to digest
In a safe place
Close your  eyes
Figuritively role them back 180 degrees from vertical
And horizontal plain
Hope fully you're comfortable
And if nothing went wrong you should be in awe
Of the view   .....
Watch what you do....
Welcome to you......
Focus please take a reading of your compass
Stay on task and don't ask questions
Of you may not come out of this
Look to the tempral lobe
In there youll see the hippocampus....
See
Do you see a door that reads
episodic memories are formed and indexed here?
Good this is where you want to be to accept this mission
...
Ready ???
Here it is
This place is the network center
Where every word you
(The collective you and all that
And those that make you "you "
Persona ,the dreamy you
The critical in self awareness you)
Have thought or said .
What I need you to do is read all of them in chronological order
While feeling the emotions you see attached to them .....
When you find ones that wronged or hurt any one
Fix them.....
K ? See you when your done
..........
Want me to lock you in?
What ?
You can't ?
I know
And you shouldn't try

Let it go
And live
My love.........
Life becomes the past so fast
And we're different
So of course you are gonna make
Mistakes
F... Em if they can't fixem

Can you be like me?
Oh wait if you do
Let me distance myself
Eventually you're going to hurt me.....
And it's going to hurt  
A hundred times more  
And for a million years
And I'm not even gonna wanna be
anywhere near that mess
No no no
Not me
Not havin it
You can keep that ****.
I ain't even playing player
Naw
Uh awe ....
Keep that **** to your **** self
Fureal

This wrinkle in intrusive batholith
juts high with quickness
Decomposing slowly  I rage upward groping and feeling her nakedness  
I'm ravenous wreckless insatiable
There's only my sanity  to keep me from harm engaged to death
I laugh Ive disabled the alarm
This mountain I take for granted
This granite I color with my blood
I love her so dearly feverishly
I leap and bound
My heart pounds
I know there's gold and crystal my love she seduced me with samples
Under her moss
I heard her say stay
Dig deeper there's more ....
She is my love
She shall always be .....
She will never leave me
she will take my life.......
Some day surely
Its a pact we've made .....
When?
She still won't tell me.......
She calms me .....
For She sees the murderous
Rampage devouring my persona
Under this mask of happy go lucky
lies the Sweet suffocating sullen
Madness and it's wearing so thin.
She says SHHHHHHH
It clears me briefly ...
I muster on.....
As leave ....
The wells fill with salt and saline for to escape from reality
Briefly is sanguine .
Lucidity comes on
Memories flood in
She is the only distraction
I know .....
She keeps the razor from wrist
How many years ....
Gallons of tears ....
How many ?
My Mother sweet Mother
My Father .. Dad ....
I took for granted
My dieng heart longs.
This mountain of granite
Will take my life ...some day
Untill then i know she won't go away..
I try to break her take it all out on her .....
I know she loves me

She stays
She says.

One day it's All happy happy
Then its me me me
Then its what about me
Jealousy
Insecurity
Look at me
Can't you see me?
Can you hear me?
Hey   hello ?
Where'd you go
Vanity ,calamity
Tragedy.
Wait woe no
Help.......
Me
No hey
Don't go
Stop hold me
You can't be......
Gone instantly
Mom
Dad
Me
Alone
Death .
Wretched
Bellicose *****
Maestro of the hollow halls
Echoing from cathedrals of woe
Conductor of maddening maleficent screams ender of dreams......leading the u greatest symphonic misery
Don't look at me..... ..

I don't want to understand you..

I'm sorry because of you....
I'm sorry .....
You can see me
The real me
The bellows that blow gail force winds of the lee's
Continually into the white hot coals of sickening lust burning within
I'm sorry.....
I'm so sorry  for if I could
I would take the blade straight from the forge INVOLENTARILY
Run you through
And end you misery.....
I see you ... .
You can never not be
You take away love
Yet no one loves you
I'm sorry for you.
Is this my lesson
I don't get it  
My pain doesn't lessen

SET THE EMOTIE
TO CONDESCENSION!
Friends countrymen ,
Lend your amendment pen
To me....set the EMOTIE
To  contemplation .......
As you do
Bear in mind this
It is an impossibility
For me ....not to say
If Ye are Roman
allora ti amo amico mio continua!
se sei americano ascolta attentamente
Where is Waldo?
Close your eyes
Let this question echo
Within all who reads
Mind....
In unison through generations
Back in time
Let Emerson hear
"Thank you!
We need you!

NOW LETS SEE!
WHOM SHALL BE ?
WARNING THIS IS A TEST
OF YOUR RESOLUTION
are you or are you not ?
Look yourself in the mirror
Little lamb .......chop
Cute little button tail
Bahe aheaheahahe
Awe didem faiwul?
Course you did little.....
Kid .......
Let your reflection look at you
Five minutes
You can't.......

Oh hey ?
Can you see POWER!
Stars.
stripes.
fireworks.
Smell the tears
The blood  
Gunpowder  
Courage in the face of fear
Hear the screams so clear
Musket fire breaking bones
Frost bitten starving
Knowing they would never again ....
See home ,yet they perceiver ed
Alone .....
Carnage in conditions so severe
Queers lesbians women men
Friends lovers or enemies
Stood and fought side by side
No disrespect meant to those who play same team
Derogatory terms used strictly for shock value .....
I stand in awe and shame for I have not the valor or means to fully convey the magnitude and depths of gratitude
Graciously ,humbly
Thank you ........
Thank you ......
TO THE REST OF YOU
OH HEY?
can you see.....
The scenes
Do you ever stop and think

Of those patriots who lie
In pieces upon the field
Crying
smoke and steam leaving chest cavity
on crimson stained snow carry their soul
Away from the field and shield them from these travesties forever more........
My country ......tis
Or is it our country
Or is it their country
Look in the mirror
Is this fear ?
Are we here
Shall we not ask what we can do
And instead ask what is this country trying to do to you?
.....
Verily Verily I say unto You
If thy country ask of me
As far as my courage allows
That I shall gladly do!
If thy country make me do
I may or may not
And make no mistake
Neck will stiffen and schism
Created
If thy country which I hold dear to me
Force me
Threaten me
Levy unmerited punishment upon me
Extort me
Single me out take from me my inalienable rights
Be little me put me on blast
Set me agin friend and kin
Because I refuse to give in
And not for reason of religion
But because I will not be in sufferance of oppression
Or beatin into subjection of fear....
I will with great raging vehemence stiffen my neck
Stare those who set against me with dominance
I will give nothing measurable unto those who strip me of my home,loved ones clothes or dignities ..
And as a declaration I will stand firm for those cannot out of fear .
Give my life if that's how far they wish to take it .........
I cannot live under the misery of fear anymore.   . That is my way
That is the or was the American way
. ......that is what the legends
....our forefathers died for!

What is this control thing all about ?
Pout !
I can't stand bein told
" You're either in or out."
I do my own thing.
Love me hate me .....
Im me......
You go on and be what you think everyone wants you  to be.
Got that ?
Do that
And don't worry bout
What I do on my time
Cause we're only given so much.
Im  the first to arrive and the last to leave
When you are in need .
I'll give u every thing
But not my life .
Not sayin I won't die for you .
I'm saying I'm loyal
But my life is but once
And it's mine !

If you think your paranoid ....
You probably are......

Call me if you don't get this message
K.
Ps
not a rhetorical k!
K?

K?0

Can I count on you
To not count on me
And still love me?
Really!?!?!?!?!?
?

Love
Oh my God
you make me great!

Those days that end within the realm of
What some would consider normality
I call insecurity.
With or without somebody
More oft than not
Lonely .........
which is not the worst thing for me I know
For the most part I get along  with the inner me
We have a lot of the same dreams
We agree on which avenue to pursue
Wether it be fantasy ,engineering poetry or painting
Then ,,,,,,,..........
Woool ........there's the other me
The judge, jury and "X"three musketeer
......alone roaming off on my own in the gloaming
Lavishing  in some plush memorie possessed by lacivious iniquities
I find sleep distasteful
Lurking ........ here's  all the more near.
Always down to abscond tears from me
Slow intake
In loop mode replaying
Memories  of the day  which carry the most bearing upon gravity.
At least
Related to me  
Deciphering .....
Perhaps obsessing on the smallest things
Trying to digest
I Guess
I brake
Fake smile
Hollow  
Lie in denial
I loose my power over
Sweetening reality
He pushes suppression
Frustrates me and leaves me
Tired and having to deal with the real reality ........
That is ........
Only tell this evening
I'm already thinking
Of something

Be one
Be two
Be three
There four
be five is betwixt
Before
And be six Which
of course is juxtapose to be seven
Everyone nose there's no
Be eight
Cause of be seven
And he regrets  this act
Cause it gave him a two more
Fortunately
It's be 9

Ok wait
Stop!!!
Call me hypercritical and a grammatically hypocritical
Hypocrite too
.....
You are literally
Using the word rong
Too much
NO -
Lit-TA-RA-lee
And another thing
With books ,magazines,
Libraries ocean beaches castles
Caves riverbeds coal mines
Mountains deserts desserts concerts the internet the oculus
The xbox the wii virtual realities the real reality literally the virtual reality
All these and ssoossooso so much more ......
So so many more alluring beautiful places
You could stick you're nose 🐽
So many places I couldn't care
****........
Noooope !
Ev---a---ry time I start to relax snooop!
I look behind and woop
There you are up to your eyebrows.
One of these dayz bro h
One of these dayz!
Literally
Wow..
LI--TA--R-AAA--LL--Y
Pow
Right to tha.... .
****
Literally ...
....
I mean seriously
No
SE-R-...EE-  OS.........