if hundred men
list hundred of your flaw
for a hundred year
and at the end
my life as a bet
coerced to  think one
i couldn't think at all

today i forgot the password
the password to one of my many apps
and i stood there
silent and scared
anxiety creeping in
fears rushing through the veins
feared what if i loose the past
those words written and late night calls
those worthless memes we sent
and those unfinished trends we did
those pictures we clicked after a thousand attempt
just to look like what's trending on the page
how do i know what lacy posted
how do i depict my happiness based on how she looked
and i stood there with my carbon footprint erased
having an existential crisis
though there was nothing but lies
but that's the most i miss.

so stupid so dumb
how I've been waiting for you for so long
with my plans abandoned
and my heart set
just for the slightest glance-

and you give me a glance
and take my breath away in return
and I, hungry for love
devote my delusive heart
to what could have been us
carelessly and soberly dwell on the land
the land where we aren't apart

no trace of your name
where you live or your age
just the footprint
on the road that we met
a stranger
a complete stranger but yet so dear and close
a stranger that easily could break my heart in two
but when I'll mend my sorrow heart
I know I'd still beat for you
so I'll wait
wait my entire day
for that singular moment of you
though no sound is heard
no trace of your caressing touch
and as the second pass
and we cross the road we met
don't trouble your SPIKY head
cause tomorrow my love I'll take that same road again.

i hear them yell
yell with no remorse
yell at the top of their lungs
and though distance covers me
i still cant get myself to sleep
i still think about it
i should have stopped the fight
but the 9 year old me had no might
and though time has flied by
it still haunts me at night

I wouldn't limp around
ask you how your day went
though I am desperate to  know of  your every second
I would act confuse when you ask a question about yourself
so you wouldn't know how I treasure all of our moments
I would kiss you back and act like i don't care
so my dear  you wouldn't be aware-

of the void you could fill
of the way i fail to breath
of the way my heart fails to beat
of the way when i try to write a poem
its you all that i can think

i love you in the shadows
i love you in the dark
i love you when you think none's watching
i love you when you think they are
i love you oh i love you but you'd never know that
my love is enough for you to not return it back
but my heart isn't brave enough to confess all of  that-

you and me we'd never work
sounds silly but you kiss too soft
you carry an umbrella for "just incase"
I love nothing more than to dance in the rain
you settle for just enough
while I want to feel too much

I am a broken vase you see
a vase that would  pour regardless how much you fill
we'd build a house where no story lies
we'd see each other but with no sparkle in  eyes
its  not love you feel
and one day you too will see
you'd kiss me but just with your lips
but I want a kiss with a wrecked whole heart
my love we are world's apart
and in our case opposites don't attract

you would be you
and I would be me
but we would never be us
that's why  we'd never work
so lets say the goodbye before it hurts

sometimes I just want it to stop
not for it to end
just enough for me to catch a little breath
just enough to keep up with the rest
just enough to laugh so hard my tummy starts to ache
just enough to enjoy those little moments, without worrying what's coming next
just enough to find myself again
just to know what I'm living for
before everything is too late