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he started to pretend with me too
a handshake delivered
as if his eyes had never met
the irises of mine

how many people had I ever seen him shake hands with? did he know
one well enough to feign a smile

he made me think of smiles
as masks. I tried to smile
and then I could not

the allure of numbness hung
close to me. I felt in presence of a lost
sincerity or that of an absent friend. I waved
while he sat in his car
with his child and his wife
And so I sent my wishes
for his good fortune asking

that they too multiply with every rotation
of car’s wheels
that the child be fed
that the roof be sturdy
that love bind well the frame of the automobile on the highway on their way home
May 2022 · 199
El viento es invisible
Mi alma es brisa
que carga el fuego
su viento invisible
sostiene mi mundo
ella llena mis heridas de flores
y cada gota de agua de su trapo blanco es un lago de alivio
May 2022 · 97
Tú eres sol
Tu corazón lleva fuego en su interior
raíces precolombinas, gitanas, negras  mixtas para que la  llama arda
como solo ella arde cuanto se prendió
durante la alba de tu nacer para darnos
tu sol
I have hugged a three thousand year old redwood tree and asked it to remember me
someday  tree will use marrow, absorb my nitrogen,  my iron that I grew accustomed to seeing in my youth drip red drip
every month clearing my ****** to grow its own leafy children
I will be locked in it’s green splendor
come spring and summer
and fall I will die again as I did before, and in winter I will disappear as I have done before o my to defy death with the help of my ringed friend. We together. A redwood in my heart my heart in a redwood
Among my prairie of tears, I planted
sweet corn singing
I hand you a flower and you open your palm and place a coal stone

I smile
after many years your flowers were pressed
died and combined
made dark but I do not just see one
I see the bouquet you gave
(The years and the darkness of soil mixed with all the gentle things in your heart)
May 2022 · 170
Weightless cloud
Ten rivers lift
and become clouds
over the ocean of my heart
Light, I am light enough to float
what song can a bell make
that does not pierce the heart

(what melody can I sing when love entangles me to form
music does not need to be seen, so why do I gulp at the thought of their deaths)
the people sauntering
around us are their own celestial bodies detached from the outside world
in their mind, inside their screens —they are far, far away.

we pass pedestrians on the street, towards
the same corner park, where we sit and chat, but we are light years from the other folks and from one another. and i wondering if i tilted my phone and aim it’s reflection into their eyes if they’d receive it, if the speed of light is really all it’s cracked up to be then how quickly can it reach them play my golden record of connection “hello, from this child of planet earth with oversized limbs”
Allude to Voyager space craft’s golden record
Recording of “hello from the children of earth”

Symbols that I wish to further connect

1. star and their distance
to people and their distance from each other

Hyperbole/ exaggeration: distance between human being

Overall focus/ shine a light on: phone as a source of disconnection from reality or human interaction as well as nature.

Nature: possibilities to tie in :
1. Insert fauna/ flora that is symbolic of connection or disconnection
Look up flowers and withering spans
+ things that are interdependent??
Maybe

Or different direction: ??

Review title
Draft 3
La lenta sabiduría de la lengua
escurre con corriente fuerte y llena
un frasco entró
¿quien se entera? si cada lengua pide
ojos y cada par de ojos suena
en diferente lengua

¿y qué tal la sabiduría del corazón?
la que dicen que no tiene razón
¿cuantos frascos podrá ella llenar ?
Tectonic plates of memory crash
close to the filament of a blooming
rose that sits with its three sisters over
over the midnight flora, as I prepare
to rest my head over a pillow they collide
the stitchery of the past lifts off
and circles like Angeles the crown of my head
I follow the morning and
I peek into a 9:00 am mass to listen to prayers. I try to find my grandmother so I look at the same row she would sit in. In a different city, in a different church, in another bench but instinctively look at the third row on the right. There is an other women bowing like the others as the priest cues with his words. She is not my grandmother. They are not my grandmothers but they are someone else’s   If I had opened my eyes here
on a hilll in Haebangchon as did
my dear friend 15 years my senior
Then one of them might know my name
but they smile as if they do
May 2022 · 102
Untitled
The evening prepares to fully gulp
the sun, the car engines zoom contorting the sound scape and twisting gravel into their menacing rubber wheels
I have been well positioned by your love
picked up and delivered over my own fire’s hearth so close I was fanned
by your bellow into the firebox and that is why I am warm
my flames powerful and controlled
enough to set afire the thin veils of deceit
I practice cracking and melting fake plastic trees
I watch their flames burn dark. dark. Darkness leaves my hearth it no longer stays
Have a wonderful partner helps you and guides you back to yourself 😌

My little homage  to Radiohead heheh fake plastic trees 🌲
Apr 2022 · 79
You are wholesome
there is nothing to chase
to fill you
so there is
only giving
Apr 2022 · 111
Public displays of fashion
Tight glam rock pants are back
mullets  have made a comeback
with the ladies and short fringes
are all the rage
curly hair is edging in
put everything behind
you. they are
good lessons to springboard
from. Put
everything behind.
everything
in your life are lessons
to springboard into
the now- springboard
into putting
a little more of everything within
your life
Springboard–
this is
your life.
Apr 2022 · 372
In the breeze
the blossoms were pink and iridescent
I painted them purple and added blue
hues to the trunks of trees
the tip of my round brush swirled
like the petals caught in the breeze
I dream of wolves resting over the grass. Wolves two times my size, together, gentle, resting/ calm like my childhood dog blackie/muzzle over a kingdom of green fescue/they are creatures of god

I dream I am there next to them, my hand stroking their fur/ for some reason I am not afraid/ when  hiking in the wild I was taught to stay away from animals/ some how I am not afraid/ there is wild wolf in my heart/ I am not afraid
Draft one

Love of dogs
Love of hiking+
Love of the wild which is wild because it does not conform to outside conditioning
Wild: nature, animals,water, weather,
everything that is not touched by illusion
so what is wild ? Is wild harmony or peace ?
Mar 2022 · 100
Grieving the living
You walk and breathe and claim your stake on earth
with every blink
the sun arises and sets
For you I grieve that I cannot
come
To the quiet tiles and the slow rocks
that are
to flesh over bone that is
To the body and the mind that are time bound
and to the cosmos in my being which are not
The dweller, the dweller cannot die because it was never born ☺️
Mar 2022 · 423
Tender things
I wobble, sail, simmer under the sun and swing in the park
watching human flowers of the earth bloom alongside tender grass
Lorca viene por la puerta y le pido
que se queda
qué hay ciertas cosas que en la noche se pueden discutir
cómo el resplandor de la luna
y la partida de amores que llenaron la copa
O cómo cada copla puede ser escrita bajo
los escombros de la noche
bajo los luceros que conjuran el nacer de la mañana
he sets the phone on the music stand it is tilted
so I get to see  half guitar, half chin
and a left hand sliding like an elegant dancer over
the frets of his classical guitar,
it has got L.A in it ,
east L.A,
Candela's east l.a  to be precise

Segovia, Bach, Buckley,  my wish to hear flamenco are  all
tucked under the sweat of his brow
when he is done with each piece
the world ends but when he smiles
and asks "what do you think?" it begins
again our chatter , fast spitty and through a smart phone
Mar 2022 · 218
agrio
a lime bursting
cascaron agrio I bite
where is the mescal
and motown at 2:00 am
When you ask me if I have ever tried a burrito,  I should sprint to the bedroom grab a cover and completely wrap myself in it and then proceed to run towards you screaming “yes!”
immediately followed  by
“But she did not cook it. I got it at Chipotle “ sung in legato just to make sure none of us make it out of this situation without feeling uncomfortable
My world is not shiny, in fashion
or trendy
it belong to the slowness
of revision in a tiny room
alone with my hand over
a piece of paper
the cup of tea close to me is
a pool of fragrant words ready for alchemy
the blanket a sweet resting
spot where I  “San Francisco- burrito” myself  until I am completely  wrapped in it.
Feb 2022 · 162
A happy Temporary
I, too am a happy temporary
stem with hands and legs
close to the ground with petals reaching
towards the sun
Feb 2022 · 74
Untitled
They come to the cemetery bring their chairs, the rose crowns and the whimsical  smiles  
five years have quickly  passed indeed gutting the closeness of skin
and deep stitching  the ones their cloth to the cloth she was buried within
death does not separate it brings  together
they are woven now with the same thread
Once and for all it all turned magic
and the girl could see she could not age
and she could not die

that all her loved ones whereabouts
were deep in her heart
because her and them were
one another
It all turned to magic
and the girl danced a calm and grateful dance
as the great spell that plagued humanity dissipated and from her countenance sorrow was lifted  

magical, the world has always been magical
Jan 2022 · 79
Addressing the cold
a pair of padded pants to save yourself from winter
you look at the next title more padding for the cold that makes you shiver inside
Jan 2022 · 140
We sunk into ourselves
We sunk into the melting ice dissolving over the Han River
changing icy thoughts to free flowing water

everything was water
clear, cleansing and clearing
you are across the street
and so am i. we are walking
in the same direction. the sky is dimming preparing its arms for the dark lull in
which only stars sing.

the people sauntering
around us are their own celestial bodies detached from the outside world
in their mind, inside their screens– far, far away.

we pass them on the street towards
the same place light years from one another wondering if I tilted my phone and aimed it’s reflection into their eyes if they’d receive, if the speed of light can carry my message.
On the tips of dried grass, I walk
bare footed aching to discover
where else a sea can be found when I am nowhere
close to the pacific roaring waves of my flat coastal city where angeles hum by the sea
and concrete kisses are copious to the flat soles of the huaraches,  plastic sandles and warm enough to be called friendly to the rubber soles of long haired girls on skateboards riding down the boardwalk

Where is the sea in this winter
when the chest holds tight to the air and wishes to expand for terror of the cold

long hours pass, dried stems come into focus
when the parched
glory of brown reveals itself as an abundance of  blades of grass marchitas to the two traveling
arches of my feet

what is grass in winter if not my answer
There is an artist who walks into dreary hospitals and law offices
to accompany his partner
he cannot paint the walls of these building  the color he desires but he paints a smile-one so pleasant it calms-on his girlfriend face
Jan 2022 · 76
An exalting heart
every earthly moment seems beautiful and fleeting when it trickles like the light through a window to illuminate your smile

as passing mourner and expectant mothers are en route the same sun drapes them and a similar ephemeral breeze grazes my face

all is precious and the heart cannot help but to exalt this truth when rays slowly make their way to the edge of your chin before they disappear
Jan 2022 · 80
A fresh cup
sometimes the earth flies away from me
drips through my fingers
slipping like thick honey into cups I have left out for too long
too many handled mugs on the counter that I confuse them for
confuse past with what is now

I as I wake try to shake this dream of something that never came to be because I
would love to pour my morning tea into along with the wildflower honey into a fresh cup
Jan 2022 · 158
Untitled
Three people paint the subway station with life
the horn announces that the next train is coming bound for the seoul
Jan 2022 · 72
Peanuts without a shell
You look at squares photographs of people
as if they were isolated drawings of a dandelion or a primrose
you take the person and disconnect them from the root
from the dark soil and the sunlight that grew them into beautiful blooming
beings
you study their exterior
look at them as if they were peeled carrots
peanuts without the shell
the black & white image measured in distance only by the ticks of a clock and the cycles of human life sits on my chest

all the gentleness and love cannot be measured by digital clocks nor can a heart
for its growth is limitless
Jan 2022 · 82
Hands in the machine
it as if we disappeared
our hands never making it past the hanging  veil
voices muffled by cloth
20 arms stretched forth holding in a cry
worker’s limbs, your daughter or sister
racing heart when they shouted out of pain
they could no longer stand

When labor too pressing too demanding stood in front of them a well dressed  smooth talker and asked politely for just one of their fingers
they again screamed
Life is here in the dust that falls over my masked face
It is here on the small damaged earth
you handed back to me as if you had simply borrowed some cheap 99 cent rubber ball
I ask why it’s so *****
you answer “ “
It’s surface soiled but  in it less flowers bloom

I ask you how you will mend it
Tell me your rides here your carpooling with your mom’s friends

that you will try to help but that I
Should figure it out

(But you borrowed from me all those who came before you)
We chew over a small wooden table
Chew bell peppers and drink old fermented tea
wonder how many more breathe until the stomach stiffens in regret and says
no more to all the veggies we must eat before they spoil in our fridge

We chew the small thoughts and the big bad memories tucked in the thinnest most transparent of thoughts
so translucent it took us most of our  lives to recognize them as just thoughts painting boxes, stacked to create an obstacle

We chew playing dalgona with our minds
trying to keep the only the portion of through a we want.

We chew and concentrate and then there are no thoughts, just the veggies I stir fried to sweet from the wild flower honey
Wearing comfortable clothing is what I desire

And if that is a purple g-string with a pair of high rise low cut shorts
You best say "good morning"

And if that is a pair of bell bottom jeans that do not press tight
against my hips with a long sleeve pink sweater
You ought to say “good afternoon”

If I please sugar in my coffee or no
coffee but instead a warm swif of chamomile
tea you best hand me the cup and show
brotherly love to your sister

If in my womb a child grows or I decide
It does not grow
You ought to stand by me but you best
leave that choice to me
Roe vs. Wade making its way back into the court matters. It would mean a lessening of womxn’s rights in the U.S.

You may hold different opinion on this matter and on abortion. However, everyone’s life is different there is no one way life unfolds just look around you. The world and someone’s life does not follow a linear or predictable narrative. I believe with all my being that if we seek to control and choose what a woman can and cannot do with her body (something we do not do federally for men) we take away her choice, we lean away from neutrality, but in a deeper sense we in act violence upon those whose lives and thinking are unlike our own. So then the question becomes do we want to continue to treat one another this way? Do we really want peace and compassion? Even when it hits home and is uncomfortable and may push you to think beyond your own experience make room for it. Look at this world for what it is and open your heart with compassion for every human being who lives a life unlike yours.

I stand behind women having a choice to choose.. I stand behind Roe v. Wade.
every edge of your body that slept
slowly awakes
how could slumber be
sweet when it robs you takes
your money and still asks
for the product of your eyes

What are you without vision?
Because there is love
there is you

Because you burn bright
there will be her and him

there will be trees and there will be flowers

and on earth hope will persist
Dec 2021 · 104
Dreams are lightning
The closing of your eyes is the clashing of clouds and their thunder for-tells the lightning of dreams
Dec 2021 · 428
You loosen my bones
Mid stride my insides
rattle and my smaller and larger
intestine begins to soften

I walk; a bag of bones
clacking in winter
Dec 2021 · 74
Untitled
When spring takes it lilies home you will find me starting the orchids by the window who survive the cold

you will find me standing
so grateful to be where I am
as I am
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