A child was born
And then another
I was paralysed by their beauty
And their power
I was paralysed by their being
Still am
And yet I held them
Still do
Although I have absolutely no idea
What the ****
I am supposed  to do

Every wound has a culprit
Every scar knows exactly who they are
You are mine
You hurt
You scarred
Deeply
Inside my heart
Then you moved
As I bled
And bled
Into the dead grey night
Eventually
I made it home
Staggering
Slowly
And lowly
Battle weary
And exhausted
Into
my newly
very well made
Empty
And now ridiculously
Ambitious
Bed.

You don’t have to look like me
Or be like me
Or think like me
You don’t have to dance like me
Or laugh like me
Or cry like me
You don’t have to do anything at all like me
To love me
Or have me love you back
You just have to know
like me
that differences
They paper up the
Cracks

There are no right words to say here
So I will just use mine instead
And hope they echo
Something someone once said
That made sense
for a minute
deep inside your head

New York City is ablaze with fame
Totally saturated in  blame
New York City can absorb
Your Pain
For one night
Only
but she will never
Ever
remember your
Name

I
Want
To
Write
One
Word
For
You
And
Only
You
But
No
Word
Presents
Itself
As
Big
Enough

Throw the rope
I’m here
Barely hanging on
That’s clear
Throw it
I’m here
Racked with fear
Throw it
Let’s pretend
even at this late hour
Something
will stay dear

You ask if I really see you
In all honesty
No
With you
I will always be blind

The conversation around here
is such a long time dead
banality reigns
triumphantly
Instead

Almost everyday
A million words tumble off my tongue
A million smiles
I give out to everyone
I come home exhausted
Overwrought
And overcome
Completely overdone
trying to pretend
I can be someone
To everyone

Clarity
Maybe just another word for
Shame
Reality
Maybe just another word for
Pain

These words mean nothing
Unless read
By you

The world is at war
With children
They are small
We are big
They are weak
We are strong
We will most likely
Win
Which one of us will lead
In triumphant song?

The world fell apart today
I chose to stay together
It seemed safer
That way

So many beautiful words
thrown at me each day
I want to catch them mid flight
mix them up
help them catch the light
But however high I reach
they hover
just above my reach
So many beautiful words
thrown at me each day
I long to touch them
feel them
breath them
write them
But they remain
just a little bit out of sight
too high
And a little bit
a little always
just that much
too high

In between
Everywhere
I have been
And in between
Everything I have seen
In between
The desperate
late night calls
I want you to know
That
In between
It all
Honestly
I know it doesn’t show but
Honestly
In between it all
I am
honestly
doing
Okay

You said there was nothing
You wouldn’t do
I said there was nowhere
I wouldn’t go
So between us there was nothing
We wouldn’t chase
Let’s get on with it then
Blatantly
Between you and me
There is nothing
We can’t face.

When there is nothing else left
I suspect
I will see you
Exhausted but still breathing
Trudging wearily
Over the precipice
To find us again
Know this
I will be here
Still breathing too

I can do this dance all night
And deep into tomorrow
My feet refuse to give in
But my soul
My soul
God, my soul
Is just about
Done in

I know you said it didn’t matter
And I know I said that too
I know in grown up lives
It shouldn’t matter
But somehow that’s not true
I know you said we’d laugh about it
I think I said that too
So why can’t we raise a smile
as we sit here
Just we two?

You know what they say
Last one to leave
Switch the lights off
I will never
Be the one
to switch the lights off
On us.

I would not buy this
Even if I had the money
Which I don’t
I would not buy you
Or you
Or you
I have no doubt
You would probably all sell yourselves
For the right amount of money
Even then
I would not buy you
I simply
Don’t have the stomach
For it

Every single moment I spend with
You
is like
a really bright moon
and
a brilliant bright sun
coupled together
and crushed
into one.

Well now
There is no need to
Say
These words
Out loud
We have said them all
Before
no need to say
These words are
just for you
We’ve done all that ten score
A hundred times or more
I will write them now
instead
Because I love the
Honest
Simple
Sublime
Sound of them
Inside my head
I love you
I miss you
And truth be known
What I feel now
I  will
Feel
Today
Tomorrow
And intensely
Forever more

You are the best friends
A girl
Could ever ask for
Glamorous
Caring
Present
Delightful
I am
Blessed
Forever
And honestly
Grateful
But
What a shame
you
Will never
Ever
Really
Know
Me

I knew a girl who played a pink violin
So beautifully
That the world fell
Into time
with her uneven  tune
I knew a girl who played a pink violin
So violently
That the world stood still
And changed their mind
I knew a girl who played a pink violin
So silently
That the whole world
listened
heard unintentionally
Applauded gently
then quietly
peacefully
blissfully
Closed their eyes
And
universally
Fell into a
Very
Easy
Deep
And beautiful
Sleep

This is enough
For me
Now
Let’s stop
And breath
This is enough
For you
now
I know it
To be true
So stop
Honesty
Let’s stop
Now
And breath

Was there a warning bell I missed?
A buzzer
A loud shrill
To alert me
An alarm bell
to tell me
Of impending pain?
Incoming missile
Lie low
Danger afoot
Go slow
Was there a warning bell
I missed
Don’t trust
Go slow
Be alert
Lie low

In a sea
Of sameness
I would
Always
Choose you!

Ahhh there you are
You came back
Unexpectedly
Suddenly there you are
How good to see you
God, how I have missed you
How glad I am you came back
Intact
Battle scars
Yes, I can see
Fainter
Than when you left me
still
I can touch them now
And help you heal
You came back to me
Perfectly
Imperfectly
And
beautifully
Intact

I wanted to write you a love poem
Better than any love poem ever written
By anyone
Ever before
But I couldn’t
I wanted to say words to you
Better than any words that were ever  said by anyone
anywhere
ever before
But I couldn’t
In the end we settled for a drink
And Billy Joel
And that was good enough
At least
That’s what you said

Good God , did you see the news today?
Two people died in
Misery
Not sure how far that is from here
Ten hundred miles away
For sure
Maybe more
Surely, it can’t be too close
From those
We hold
Close
and love
The most?

This just might be what it’s really
All about
Not the great brilliant lights
Or the dark desperate lows
The rights
The wrongs
The lies
The unfolds
This just might be
all it’s about
Nothing more than
Sitting here
Being still
drinking gin
Alone
With you

There is always an answer
Know this
If you know nothing else
There is always a road out
A light
A tunnel
Know this
There is always a song
A vague melody you can recall
Know this
There is always someone
watching
Know this
If you know nothing else
There is always
a way out
But not for long.

We stood there
in the rain
Neither moving
Neither noticing
Neither caring
All I could think was
Gene Kelly
Danced in the rain
Why can’t we.?

Woke up this morning
and couldn’t find myself
Looked in the mirror
Nobody there
Searched high and low
No sign of anyone
Anywhere
Dialed 911
They didn’t care
Just hung around
Alone
All day
With nobody there

Hmmmmm........see. .....here’s the thing
I’m not sure I  am the one you should be crying for
I think others might deserve it more
It’s not that I don’t like the attention
You know I do
Maybe a bit too much
But even I
have to admit
There are a lot more people out there
Worth  the crying
For

Every single day I am away
From all of you
Is twenty four hours
One thousand four hundred and forty
Minutes
Eighty six thousand four hundred
Seconds
Wasted
Whistling
Wishing
Myself
Back
Home
Again
With all of
You

This is deeper than I ever
wanted to go
I can take real
Delve into the unknown
I can swim to the surface
When the  waters are unknown
But seriously
This
Even for me
Is way deeper than I
Ever wanted to
be

Buyer Beware
Is void
When you buy
In a sale

I am throwing a rope here
Grab it
If you can
Not sure if
I am strong enough to hold us
But God knows I will try
Who cares
We will go down together
Or rise
Phoenix like
Into tomorrow
And one more glorious day

Shall we just lay it all down here
I can wrap it up in a bow
So it looks good
You know that’s my gig
That’s the easy bit
The difficult bit
Twofold
Shall we just lay it all down here
And if we do
What colour bow?

I could say Goodbye to you
Without pain
One time and ten score
If you could promise me
Our next hello
Will  even up the score

Clarity is everything
When you can see clearly
When you can’t
It is simply a word
Tumbling around on someone else’s
Tongue

The day fell away from us
glistened slightly
before decent
Into a murky blue night
Lit by the not too distant lights
of a city
that tempted
strange delights
We held firm
In our murky blue light
Far away
From the city
that tempted
us
each and
every night

Don’t look to me for honesty
For honestly
Not sure if I can give it
Don’t look to me for truth
For truthfully
Not sure if I can do it
Don’t look to me for trust
For trust me
Not sure if I can find it
Don’t look to me for faith
For faithfully
Never seem to find it
Don’t look to me for love
For lovingly I’ll decline it
For everything else
I’m your woman !

I don’t actually live here
Anymore
Whoever you see
is definitely not me
I live elsewhere
In my head
Whoever you see
Sitting here
In my chair
Trust me
it’s definitely
Not
Me

I loved you yesterday
I will love you tomorrow
However
Right here
Right now
We are deep into
Today

No
Let’s leave it at that
Shall we?

There is a dearth
Of good conversation around here
A lack of humor
A tumor
growing steadily
Can we cure it
Without insult?