There is nothing I would rather do
right now
than sit right down
beside you
there is nothing than I shouldn’t do
right now
than sit
right down
beside you

Can I fall in love with you
again
can I turn the last page back
again
can I take last night back
again
can I rewrite tomorrow
again
can I unsay my words
again
can I play happy ever after
again
can I remember who we are
again
can I see you anew
again
can I be me for you
again
can I fall in love with you
again

That was where you found me
Young
careless
stuffed full of my own importance
shining my personal halo
for the whole **** world to see
carrying my own pedestal
for someone to put me on
carrying my own cross
for someone to
crucifix me
upon

I love you
Out
loud

I will stay with you
in the dark
because
at other times
and in other days
in other ways
you showered me with
your  light
when you had it.

You’re trouble
this much I knew
from the moment
you stood there
boldly
and
answered
right back

This wasn’t a win
but it wasn’t a fail
we didn’t **** each other
no one’s in jail

I will take this love
and I will run with it
as far as it will take me
as high as it will make me
I will take this love
and I will run with it
and I will never look back
for fear
reality will overtake me

Do you remember we swapped toys
when we were five
Do you remember we swapped promises
when we were ten
Do you remember we swapped kisses
at fifteen
Do you remember we swapped dreams
when we were twenty
Do you remember we swapped tears
at twenty five
Do you remember we swapped lovers
when we were thirty
Do you remember we swapped lives
at thirty five
Do you remember we swapped lies
at forty
Do you remember we swapped partners
at forty five
Do you remember we swapped kids
at fifty
Do you remember we swapped dreams
at fifty five
Do you remember you swapped life
when you were sixty .

I saw you
I know you didn’t feel it
but I did
I saw you
just a glimpse
of you
it was late
I could be wrong
but honestly
I saw you
for the first time
in such a long time
I think I saw you
but it was late

Light a light for me
I will see it
eventually

It’s just another Saturday morn
fading into Sunday
slipping into Monday
cruising into Tuesday
delving into Wednesday
diving into Thursday
dying into Friday
crying into Saturday
It’s just another Saturday mom

I started at nine
I left at five
I rarely smiled
There is no exception to the rule
Yes,
life really
can
be that cruel

It’s impossible to love everyone
believe me
I have tried
and failed
so now
I just love the ones
who make me laugh
and those
who no longer know how
to laugh

Emptiness
invades the room  now
it falls like confetti from your lips
and scatters truth
into the abyss

I know my tears
and my sorrow
drips and drips and drips
like torture upon your brain
know this
it drips on my brain too

I lost you just when the tailwinds started
God, they howled
Now I am swimming just a beat ahead of
the storm
I’m running for cover
and looking back for you
always.

He is grown now
handsome and proud
I am old now
bewildered and cowed
but…

I don’t know.alone ness
although I am touching the edge of it
It’s sharp but
oddly soft
it’s cold but
strangely warm
it’s alien but
somehow feels like home

They are grown men now
I watch over  them from afar
they have their wives and rings
and slings
and other things
that bind them
and make them sing
sometimes I want to scoop them up
one in each arm
like long ago
throw them in the back of my car
and sing out loud
ridiculous
melodies
laugh out loud
to
lyrics
born
inside my car.

She is gone
again
just as quickly has she
arrived
like a wisp of smoke
again
like a sunrise missed
again
like a moment lost
again
like an opportunity
known again
like love
found again

I will not
not because I cannot
but simply because I will not
anymore
rage
for the single cause of rage
it is not worthy
anymore.

I will take your words
and make them better
I will decipher your language
letter by letter.

Eventually
the lies disappear
like smoke upon touch
the truth appears
without warning
that it could ever mean so much
eventually
morning dawns
from a night filled with tears
eventually
without the fanfare
life starts again
to everyone’s surprise
we awake
again
a little embarrassed
again
to a glorious
and  unexpected
sunrise.

Don’t play
with the real people
in your life
they really are
rare

If you asked again
after this long time
I would still say
No

I’ve searched my whole life
for true love
woke up this morning
and there it was
asking if I wanted a bacon sandwich
or two
Who knew?

There is no smile
as wide as my smile
when you and
I
yet again
manage to navigate
another
heartfelt
difficult
painful
mile

You say you never want to leave me
well
let me tell  you
that was about two hours before
you left

There is nothing
yet everything
wrapped up tightly
about to explode
lives will implode
right here
right now
bang in the centre
of this room

I could shake your hand
but I won’t
I could take your hand
but I can’t
I could walk away
so
tonight
I think
I actually ******* will.

You desperately search my eyes for answers
I don’t have
I’m just not that girl
but I will offer you this
it will honestly
seriously
inevitably
one way or the other
turn out all right
or at least
the way it’s supposed
to turn out
for you
one way or the other
Believe.

I heard what you said
about the end of me
and you
I still love you
enough
to never
tell anyone
it
simply
is
not true
but
we both know  
that
you know that
too.

My fire has just about
gone now
See the tiny flicker
left alight
I think that’ is probably
my soul
for your sake
and mine
please
do not
exhale

We have always run
just a beat ahead
of the incoming storm
I have always loved you
just a beat ahead
of the rising morn

Life kicked in
around nine o ‘clock
last night
don’t know why I am
surprised
my father told me
it would happen
someday
still
it took me unawares
it took me
totally
by surprise

Words flow from me
he said
I can write a poem
without a thought
Words escape me
I said
I can’t write a poem
with a thought

I have been searching this house all night
just can’t find anything worthwhile
a couple of memories
an odd laugh
a lot of pain in the kitchen
a lost birthday cake behind the sofa
a summer party shoved under a bed
a new start
rotting and forgotten
hidden randomly
beneath a a pile of broken hearts

Here’s a poem about nothing
because nothing says more
than the rest of us could ever say
if we tried all day tomorrow
and the rest of today

I have said the words now
I have said the words
and I have watched them bleed
out loud
I have said the words now
I have said the words
and I have watched you leave
out loud

I miss the girl I used to be
she got lost somehow
in between the crying
and the trying
to be the girl
I desperately thought
I needed to be

Do you ever think that
Poems
are just words
random thoughts
rearranged
everyday words
that people say
and think
casually
everyday
then a few of us
desperately
try to make a grab for them
capture them
and make them
more than they were ever meant
to be

I’m pulling up outside
our bags are packed
kids in the  back
I’m reeving the engine
lets go
don’t look back

Don’t leave me to stand all alone
I fear I will bend over
and break an important bone

Beautiful boy
with tears in his eyes
too salty
to forget
Beautiful boy
with hurt in his soul
too honest
too real.

I love you
Inside and out
have no doubt
I love you
rights  and wrongs
late night songs
and all
I love you
short nights and long
I have loved you
all along

You have left a stain
on my soul
and my home
like blood
it seeps endlessly
effortlessly
freely
into my bones

I know how much you love the sun
I think you would follow it
anywhere
perhaps you did
and now
your scorched skin
is forever
Tender to my touch

Three words
John
Jack
Boo
Now that’s poetry!

Here’s the thing
I never missed you
Not a one of you
I hardly noticed you were gone
until
suddenly
yesterday