Early May
and the winds are still howling
been freezing us since October
could one of us
be the strength beneath it’s wing?

I watch my girl
claw herself upward
slowly and painfully
on the greased pole
of her dreams
while others
take the stairs.

Most of you
is gone from me now
snippets remain
your smile
your brown eyes
the way you saw the world
your indifference
your belief in me
your difference
to me
your belief in strange
I was not brave enough
even though we both
wished me so.

I don’t want to talk about us now
can’t you see the storm clouds
gathering to the west?

I used to wake up
slightly alive
now I wake up
go straight
to your cot
and silence both our cries

The new stars
keep roving
& the roads rill out
down the hills -
I am so lucky
that you smiled
at my wayward
life, let me
open your grace
with a strum
of my fingers.
I loved you first,
and best - just ask
the wild nets
of new stars -
they'll tell you
everything.

The night is filling up
with white wine and
other people's laughter,
but you are asleep,
moon-touched.
Can you hear the sea,
from your corner
windows, lapping
the stonework until
it's faceless?
Can you catch
that brief scent
of snow, before
the clouds dive?

No matter if you can't.
I send this
to tell you
what you are -
a flash of truth.