I wonder if he is aware of the immensity of my desire. The things I would do for my body and my mind to be intertwined with his, much more than just every once in a while.

I wonder if he can sense the fear buried within my soul. The way the thought of losing him even for a brief moment, seems to shake up my whole world.

I wonder if he feels the way my eyes gaze over at him in awe, lost in his existence, as he watches the rest of the world. The way my fingers trace his every outline, hoping to memorize each beautiful curve that make up his gentle features.

I wonder if he senses my worry when we do not speak for a few days. The way my mind spirals, creating various irrational thoughts. That even though I give him the space he needs, I wish to engage with him at all times.

I wonder if he ever wonders about me, too.

Perhaps I’m just a lovesick fool.

Still, I wonder.

There is this man
Beautiful
Insightful
Full of soul.
After all this time
I’m still in awe and
I’m still not sure what it is
But every breath slowly inhaled
And every bit of air so gently exhaled shortly after
Seem to mesmerize me.
I am lost in his existence.
So entranced
I seem to forget
I must take a breath of my own
In order to remain present.

I fantasize about his touch
And long for his soft lips pressing on mine
At all times.
Go ahead,
Call me a fool.
I would have to agree
For I have fallen victim
Enslaved
To his consuming presence.

Now
Lying next to him
Anticipating these feelings will dwindle.
Everything I was longing for
His embrace
His warmth
I have it all in this moment.
Alas, I can feel content.

Proven wrong again
For this desire
Seems to transform.
I now wish to never let go
To remain in his arms forever
Become one.
Seems I am unable
To feel fully satisfied once more.

Still
I’m not sure what it is
But I shall continue
To crave his sunlight and
Admire his soul.

I must remind myself to inhale again.

The existence of humanity
The capacity of a mind
The complexity of a soul
Fascination
Pulsating
    Each
         And
     Every
Vein.
Compelled by the existence of another.
My body
My mind
My soul
Always searching for more.
Will I ever feel satisfied ?

So often we associate love directly with pain.
We accuse it of causing us
Anguish
Damage
Misery.

Irrationally deciding
To never engage
With another being
On this deeper level again.
Convinced
We must avoid such harm.

But wait—
Is this merely a way
To justify the ways in which
We allow our feelings to hold the power?
Consume us
Confuse us and
Take complete control?

Strip down your hurt
Your anger and
Your bitterness.  
You may see clearer
Recognizing
It is not the presence of love that is hurtful.

Rather
The absence of love
The loss of love
The misidentification of love
Igniting these feelings within.

Truth is,
When love is open
Honest
Pure and
Present
It is truly an invaluable treasure.

She smiles every chance she gets Chances are slim nowadays She believed in love and held all close Until she was hurt, now love is nothing more but a distant memory, if I could hold her dear, tightly grasp to keep near, I want to let her know, that faith is not lost, that she can smile again. I'm lost in her eyes while I'm searching for her heart. She is hope.

I sip the red wine and place it back on the table—Eyes fixated on the tiny gnats attracted to its sweet aroma.
They dance around the rim.
Curiosity and temptation controlling their every move.
I watch a little longer
As one submerges itself into this warm pool of red.
Suicide.
My mind wanders further.
To what lengths are we willing to go to
In order to acquire our greatest desire,
No matter how destructive it may be?

I feel as though I have given away as much as I can bear,
Without receiving the same in return.
Oh no— I begin to worry.
Where has my selfless nature gone?
Has my genuine desire to uplift the souls around me,
Suddenly vanished from this universe?
Where have those eager and thriving sprouts been buried?
It seems my soil has become much too dry to nourish this growth any longer.
I worry more.
I feel so willing
So capable
But why are my heart and soul
Suddenly so malnourished?
You see truth is,
No matter how strong a plant,
Or how able they are to flourish,
They are less likely to reach this full potential
Without enough
Food
Water
And sunlight.
So yes,
I have become malnourished
But I hold hope
In the countless beings around me
To lend me what I need
To begin new growth.