I was your one,You were her two.
It's weird how those things never work out
You are someone's life but you are too busy trying to find someone who makes you feel something. Someone every bit of you recognizes as yours.
Yours to love.
Yours to have.
All yours.
So you take it for granted that your his first thought,
You forget to let him know he is your last thought.
You just don't get that who you love won't love you back.
It's either love or be loved.

It feels strange when you talk about her,
Could be that I was used to being her.
The one you were supposed to love and spoil.
Instead you fought it every step of the way,
You let me down when I needed you.
Now you tell me how you took her shopping,
The little things you never got me.
How you get her the things that were supposed to be mine,
It feels like someone slept in my bed,
Wore my clothes and walked in my shoes.
Guess me leaving changed you,
Only for her to have the best parts.

I went from being the girl that guys like to look at,
to the girl they take home to meet mom.
You know how it goes,
out with the summer skirts and into floor sweep dresses.
Learning to home make and wear a facade.
The patient smile even when your boiling crazy,
the platitudes when your mind is a ring with sarcasm.
Now I don't have to change my walk, thank God for that,
just who I walk with and where I walk.
What can I say, am growing older.

If you let me love you,
I would make the gods jealous with my adoration.
Write you odes and sonnets from dusk to dawn,
serenade you with whispers of love.

If you let go of your inhibitions,
I could seep into your veins,
like a flood of warmth and desire,
take over your body and mind,
truly make you mine.

You see, I want to possess you,
like something I carved out of bark,
put you on a pedestal and worship you.
For you are truly divine.

Let me be the first thought you have when you wake,
the last if only before you fade.
I can be your world and it's trimmings,
Just say the word and am yours.

There is a place I go to sometimes,
it's a little hole that opens up when you need it.
It can be whatever you need it to be.
The balm for that pressing pain that squeezes your sobs out,
it is an in between place when you're falling apart.
See, time stops in that hole.
It lets you breathe.
And lets you live.
Somehow life isn't so sombre when you stop hurting.

It takes away the parts of you that are broken and gives you temps.
Isn't that what you needed?
To be fixed?
But see scotch tape and glue don't take away the scars.
The knowledge of things that can't be burn marks into you.
You grow into someone else that walks a little slower,
from knowing.
Once you discover something covering it up won't help.
So you're a little colder and a little more forlorn.
Innocence doesn't bind you anymore.

It's a whisper of hope when you feel lost,
a comforting hand when you feel alone.
It's a halfway place,
we all need one of those when our hearts fall in,
and the burden of feeling causes us to collapse in on ourselves.

And even though things have changed between us,
The love we once felt doesn't fade.
that love, that knowledge... that doesn't go away.
I wish I could unknow every curve of your face,
and every word you half speak then change your mind.
It would be easier if it did go away,
if I could hate you.
Maybe if we had fought more,
if there were hateful words you had said that I could recall in perfect clarity --
ugly words that I could throw at my reflection when I stood in front of the mirror.
See, it's probably my fault you didn't love me enough.
whenever I look at my reflection I wonder what was so wrong with me,
that our relationship fell apart.
That doesn't make it easier to forgive myself.
It might be easier if my heart didn't skip a beat every time I hear your name.

BUT, how many of us can say we did something ******* up for a love that didn't work out?
That we uprooted ourselves and turned into someone else.
I jumped and fell freely and ended up at rock bottom.
But I'm digging my way out one sad movie at a time.
Digging while my eyes sting with tears,
as my hands bleed,
as my clothes tear away.
And I'm trying really hard to not be embarrassed about failing.
It doesn't always work out, I knew that.
That didn't stop my heart from beating to the thuds of hope.
If only you were the one.
If only I could have been what you wanted and compromised some more.

Each time we break up I want to crawl into bed and never get out.
I analyze each part of me,
wondering what didn't fit into a part of you, why it couldn't fit.
I know it couldn't fit into a part of anyone else.
I think about my life,
berating myself at the bad choices.
I wonder if I was wrong -- maybe we weren't so bad?
Maybe that was as good as it gets?
Maybe I asked for too much?
Maybe I'm too idealistic and too crazy and I need to be more realistic and grab a hold of a man that will do.

But no,
I want a man that wants to make me happy.
A man that knows am everything he needs and isn't afraid.
I want you to be ready for me.
Don't run cause we always end up right here.
I want you.
Just you.
It's always only been you.

Today I felt it,
the fire in my veins that burns for you.
I wanted more and more.
You gave me you and I couldn't get enough.

Today we became one.
My soul coming apart as it met yours.
I shuddered to feel so close to you.
I was yours and you were mine.

I tried to walk away but you held me,
and I was undone when I looked into your eyes.
You were everything I wanted,
I  wanted time to stop for us.

Today I fell in love again,
You kissed me and I melted.
I love you more than ever.
Just don't ever let me go.