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Mia Mar 2013
Feel so lost
Like maybe am in a wrong place
Or just teleported to the time
When i least want to be alive.
Everything hurts
From my aching bones to my heart
Weary love worn heart
In trying to love all i did was hurt you
I shouldn't have taken a gamble
With you as the stake.
Mia Mar 2013
I was wondering if you think of me
It could have been different,you know
We were both pig headed.
If only i had shut up and you listened
Walked away and you stopped me.
I half hoped you would follow
Tell me we would be okay.
But am afraid your angry words
And my broken heart
Have dug their nails into holds
Forcing us apart.
I can't cross the chasm without you
been wiped out of sanity by pain
If ever you change your mind
I will be by the bridge
Waiting for a kiss.
If not, then i will have given up
On love and such things.
Mia Mar 2013
I don't need my heart anymore
you can have it,
Shriveled and defeated.
I am tired of the pain that bathes me in waves of agony.
I don't want to love
I don't have hope
I don't need a prince charming
They only last till midnight.
I don't believe in forever and happily ever after.
They are lies waiting to happen.
Give me money anyday
Loads and loads of it
It's how we shopaholics live
Burying the pain beneath
Myriads of beautiful things.
Mia Mar 2013
I close my eyes hoping the pain will pass
Excruciating
Numbing
Wiping out my conscious thought.
I should be used by now,
To the patterns it follows.
Betrayal,denial, anger.
How could you?
You couldn't.
I could hit you.
Is it possible i didn't know you?
That you were different for a while?
I probably saw what i wanted to
Between lunacy and desperation.
You see, i was afraid to be alone.
The sounds that keep me up echo
Wishes that it hadn't ended
Care for my shattered heart.
Dying on the floor where you tossed it
Am not perfect but i was right.
I dunno how to be strong and go on
when i miss you with every breath
Every thought rotates around your face
Swimming in and out of focus
Of my glazed mind.
I seek release in hot tears.
Falling like from the sky
Will they obliterate the pain?
Or my resolve to stay away?
It wasn't meant to end this way.
I was your love,or so you said.
We all expect love to last forever
Instead it shackles us and makes us slaves.
I don't feel free though.
I would rather be with you
And ***** the consequences.
Oh gosh it hurts so much
Am rolled up into a ball
Sobbing out my love.
Mia Mar 2013
I feel really stupid
For loving you without reservations.
I feel duped somehow.
For believing you were the one.
Every girl dreams of meeting him,
I thought i was lucky.
I never expected to end up broken
Beating myself up over the years wasted.
Greys and pastels by your side
Making you happy.
There must be something messed up with me
Why couldn't i be content with bits and pieces?
Instead i wanted all of it
Unending forever together.
Joke's on me,
It really is over.
Mia Mar 2013
It's been almost a year
Since we parted ways.
You came to see me in the rain
I threw your flowers in your face
And pushed you away.
You stood there drenched
And watched the light on in my room.
And then turned and walked away.

It's been almost a year
And yet I still love you.
You who made me smile
the boy that drove me nuts.
I miss talking to you,
telling you I want to be with you.
I miss your laugh
when I tell you I need you.
I miss you.

A year and some days
Couldn't lessen the pain.
Of you telling me you loved me no more
but wanted one last night.
I can still feel the sting of my palm
From kissing your cheek with brute strength.
I can feel the rage that fueled selfworth.
I turned and walked away.

I hope you got a good look
Of the last time you will watch me
Walking away with ruthless intent.
When you are alone a year from now
Remember you lost a good thing
and how I loved you.

It's been almost a year
I thought I was done.
But if you rang the doorbell
I would fly into your arms
And forget the past.
Not the love we shared ;
Just the pain.
I still dream about you.
Mia Mar 2013
At the precipice we change
And time stops for us
All I want this time
Is a love that can't be contained
One so pure and enthralling
It makes me lose my head.
I want to be swept away on a tide of passion
Lose myself in depths of you
Intriguing and exciting
You hold me close
much closer than before
everytime I walk away
end up closer to you.
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