Mushrooms
My lady is staring at me with love
Bono is being weird
I wrote a little poem
This is fun
I probably have brain stuff
Profoundly profound. . Jnndmrkrke jdj

Thank you Lord I can be homeless in the USA
I can sleep on park benches in Malibu
And ******* in public parks
Thank you God
For the EBT and hospitality
Free food and good weather
Cali is paradise
I can rot in the sunset and watch the hordes commute to their dead end job
I can watch the world crumble
As I eat a big Mac
I am truly
Privileged
Thank you for the clean water and good *****
My ***** is here now
Life is fine, if you live it
& If you stop thinking
about it

She was truly perfect. Body like aphrodite
6ft tall, freckled nose and radiant eyes like a forest
Then she told me something
And now sleeping next to me she's like a stranger
5 months like that. I wish I knew sooner. And now I'm angry at God because I know I can't do better. I just wanted it to work but now it can't.
And to think her name was Hope

Feeling the steel on my temple and the trigger locked around my finger
There's no relief
I've already been dead for years
This feels redundant
and with none of the fan fare I was hoping
Now I smile

Sick of everything
Sick of the world and people and her and myself and my cat and my musical mediocrity
Sick of living

Sick of the torturous routine
Sick of not getting better

What is 'better'?

Wanna sleep for eternity but instead I write at 4 am
Too many tears have been spilled on this
Too many dreams manifest into nightmares
My escape is a quick pull
& my love will be permanent

Don't forget to forget me.
I know you will

So hollow and void
My intentions are sinister or mostly indifferent;
I treat you like garbage because Im void of concern, apathetic, cold
You are merely an experience on this meandering train wreck of an existence
You will be discarded, or you will leave, makes no difference

The paper crumbles and the ink swells. I see my self in you. When I still believed in love; I'm sorry
You haven't learned, it's not my problem. Beautiful one
. Not my problem you had faith in me

I'm a stranger, unknown, unaccounted for.
My face is blurry and lingers on a bulletin board in a dull
Cafeteria
I am hurt and forgotten
I'm the one you don't even bother to ignore

I pick up my heart and plead to the voices
I have a semblance of a soul but it is mostly revoked,; the calls for death smother my mind with an acute numbness

I will walk along the glass to face them
And I will be recognized even if it means that I become nothing