This girl interrupted my sleep
I never talk on the phone but she insisted;
crippling OCD and trigger fixations.
Her word is 'shoot"
If you say 'shoot"
She'll immediately recede into herself and become mute for the entirety of the day.
We moved on from that;
She told me she liked my voice, I told her she's got a cute laugh.
She didn't seem so crazy after the 3rd hour

Took a walk;
Saw a cool trail
Saw the litter

Saw the bramble
I walked in the road
Saw the lack of people
And the red truck
With tires now deflated
Saw the sun
Saw the breeze
Saw the pebbles along borders and a misty eyed grasshopper
Swallowing a leaf

To chop off my **** would merely be a function of desire

To chop off my hand would mean I couldn't pluck a rose

To run off into a lake would mean
I learn to breathe underwater for some time

I see other avenues

Back to the ugly

Like a cyclical hell.
I was here 7 years ago, & I wondered if things would be different.
All procrastination and all sides quests -

If you're resolute on the end, then it will end.

These people and places I intermingled with were mere distractions.  Happiness is a warm gun
- lennon

Finally told you how I feel and it was liberating.
Was tired of the reluctance and nicety
and fake virtue, may as well spill my guts.
I wanted you to know that I hate you, and how vile you are, and how much of a disgusting pig you are.
I wanted you to see that side of me. That's the side that sleeps well at night, knowing he has no one to please & no one to rely on;
peace of mind

It's getting hard to live
When I can't even make up my mind
To exist

You get what you give
It's no use tryna make it out alive

Don't forsake me
Let me be
I'm riding this wave
Into uncertainty
With my eyes closed
Waiting for the call



I fold my head in my hands
And pray to eternity

I wanna make my way into the callous air

And see

This is a song about nothing
About crying outside

About dying tomorrow
And making a mess

You've got a face like a sun
And a body like a bent
Stem


Hold you close so you don't fall with the crowd

I'm running late now and seeking another
Appointment
Dead souls for the way we forget

A song about nothing
Can't even rhyme
I forged a ticket
And spat out an idol


Don't say you want me
When you wanted an excuse