I talked to her for an hour on the phone and she called me babe and the night prior I was pounding her as she cried out and begged for more; I then pumped into her and watched a movie after whilst cuddling.
Now she deleted me.
This is why I say "they don't t belong to me it was just my turn"
I then get back on my app & match with a Latina named "Rain"

The pain splits my head open
& My heart spills out of my gut

Greedy gelatinous slithered eyes stab at me
& A duckling yellow combover with grey tongues spit at me
"No time off"

I turn off the device and go back to bed; the fuzz in my head lingers but at least now I know I wasn't crazy, just
sane

Flip every plate into the pit
  We talk about ******* but never do, her wife wouldnt let us anyway
But I scrape more **** into the trash and talk to the old lady, she's goes off into the eating lounge.
I talk to the old man, old and dying
There is no youth here.
I try to talk to the kitchen, they don't talk in my language.
I try to talk to myself but I am too ashamed to self-associate

So I take a breath and then 10 hours turn into 5 minutes as I break with mild tremors.
I am alive and now I can sleep to escape
Until tomorrow, until I
Have forgotten who I am

What I want to see is more blue, or maybe
Light greyish
Teal
Coated with sparkles
In a reflective aquarium
With eels and sponges,
Then I can go swim with my face facing the fishes like my friends in
    The deepest water, riding a  
bellowing whale to somewhere far far away

Met up with my ex, and I left feeling more alone and isolated. No one person is the answer to your problems nor will they ever complete you.
I'm glad I broke the illusion

I'm alone whilst touching flesh, heart to heart, blood to blood.
Sticks for hands grab at a bended waist and the hair tangles with every ******.
I can now forget to blow out my head, I'll be late anyway

She says I "can't change"

The stuff she wants me to fix is superficial like buying flowers and spending more money on dates.

If that's her measure of love whilst disregarding all the ways I helped her and loved her unconditionally what the **** am I hanging on for?

It's just a shallow justification for her *******, considering she already 'moved on' with another guy a week after our break up

when it's over it's over
and it dies
  months before you even knew it.
women are nature's best actors