As versatile as our minds, being in an odd sync... Traveled.
We saw each other for who we were.
Or at least i did.
As memory serves, you proposed forever.
But forever is a long time.
In my vast memory, a memory without verses and in contradicting our own universe.
Like a memory verse, you stuck to my head, even after you were gone.
I recited you back into my life, and clung on-to the petty hope.
A hope filled with despair.
We would've been a great pair.
Now like a memory not needed, I'll put you in a vase.
And slowly erase you, like a memory-verse!

I will light you a candle, each time you say, you care.
And i will mourn those words.
I have sugarcoated my pain, with droplets of virtual honey.
Now your hurtful words taste like caramel on a lonely night.
I pray you feel as miserable as you thought, you've made me feel.
Loneliness, is not spelling the words right, with blurry eyes from a damp sheet, filled with leftover tears!
I am a woman, in need of love, attention and sometimes, petty things.
I'm not perfect, but i try!
I'm strong on some days...
But i cry!
And if there was a next life, I'd like to not exist!

We always fall in love.
But we never fall out of it.

I stood up, in love.
Since all we do is beat around the bush, for heartless things, we used our hearts, less for!
I can't live with you, but I'd die without you.
What's left to smile about, when the man of my dreams, slowly walked into my nightmare.
I hate you, but if you kiss me...
Something asleep in me, might wake.
Stop coming close to me.
I can smell the cologne of your audacity.
I love you, but it's for my own benefit... That you shouldn't know.

I can't remember what I'm here for
I only feel heartbroken, listening to love songs.
I only get lonely, when I'm around people.
I feel disgust, when i fall in love.

When all the love is doubtful...
Life becomes a state of suspended animation.
I start to think...
Maybe I'm an irony, to all things good.

Third gimmick:

I see... So this is life??
What life??
The jokes i used to laugh to before.
Are not funny anymore!
Even life feels like death, and death seems to be calling out warmth!
I often fantasize about myself, Alive.
Like i was an undead corpse!
Furthermore a path i found, was closed by a path that found me!
Not once, has anyone ever asked me, what i wanted.
All they ever do is look at me an assume. I need directions, but they assume i know.
I need help, but I'm assumed to be independent.
At this pace, i might lose my beauty to an ugly situation!

Second gimmick:
A cup half empty, can also be a cup half full.
Depending the who feels the pain, it can either be great, or less.
So, to the path of an independent woman, i stand on, not walking... Standing.
With eyes full of shame, i stand within myself, shameful.
Ashamed of my full self.
Of a how a 'fool' i was.
I tool i am.
A help meet, but i cannot get, even meat.
No matter how i beg for help!
If life is a movie
Then i was the side character, who wasn't casted, no screen time.
I'll be the missing script!

First gimmick:
"I am beautiful, am i beautiful"??
Says the mirror, each time i blink at it.
An image i see of myself, can't be compared to what others see!
"An utter disgrace"
I seem fallen, maybe i am a fallen angel.
But even Lucifer, as a fallen, still has his light and grace.
So tell me  why do i look like someone else's misfortune??
I am a woman by day, and night, a girl drowning in her own tears.
On soaked silk sheets!