Is it me?
Or, is it just me?
Struggling garbage
Something broke inside
It is different each time
Tough times rot the core
Never able to weather the storm

Hopeful tones
Splattered on the walls
I see the bells
Yet I hear no sound
At the top, I stand
Hearing no one
At the bottom, I crawl
Hearing everyone
In the middle, I kneel
I can hear the top
I can hear them now
But now all I know
Will be ****** out
By the time I stand
All the love will come out
Until what remains
Becomes lies, never found
Now, here I am
Hear me now
Before I get pushed to the back
Until I bow
Here I am now, here I am now
No matter the height I jump
I'll always be afraid
Of the here and now

All I am is busy
Artificial demand
Who was the demented soul that created the mobile phone?
Separate lives, away from the scene
Now my freedom is taken
In a line of text, strings
A puppeteer behind the scenes
Superiority breeds inferiority
But in a land full of flawed monkeys
We are equal
Not in our rights, but in our ability to be feeble
After this line, I go back to the grind
Grinding my teeth
It's what I deserve
When will the happiness return?
Have I become too disturbed to learn?

Familiar faces
Leave friendly places
Before having the chance
To enjoy it
For the man always on edge
Can never lower his guard
Not because of perceived danger
But out of habit and disregard
To the finer tastes
Which cannot be tasted
For his life itself, flavorless

Children love to play pretend
Escapism never turned into the real
Adults pretend to love and play
To escape what we are supposed to do
Is this why our fondest memories
Always originate from our youth?
Why must I be young in a world built by the old?

Sayonara
I once looked at your eyes
To find pure light staring back
Ignorance, forgiveness
Purity in one iris
But as time goes on
You stop staring back at me
Your gaze fixed on the future
Transitioned into a haze
While never looking back at me
Where did our good times go?
What did it mean to you back then?
You can't lift your head, your guilt is heavy
But I wish I told you
That it was not your fault, time is our assault
The mirror you look into is far from here
How can someone so young look forward to the end?
Why did you grow up so quick?
Why do you trust no one?
I blink my eyes with no more haste
Only to find what remained
Has gone for good...

Examine all cultures
Learn about their principles
Of loyalty
Honor
Respect
Dignity
Learning a fraction about life
Can piece together
A clearer picture

They say that beggars
Cannot be choosers
For they end life as losers
Choosing to snooze
As they drown in *****
For even the highest of standards
Hit the ceiling
Better to remain low
Than to stray
Unless what they desire
Can never go away

How can you say
To just quit something?
Can you rewind your mind?
Like a track? Is this hip-hop?
How can a brain know everything
But never say anything?
In the march of time
Solutions do not spring
They need cultivation and elation
Maybe that explains
The state of all nations

Human versus human
We call that the past
Human versus self
We call that the present
Human versus humanity
We call that the future
Subjugating and eliminating
To avoid substitution
Destitution's lullaby
Spoken aloud, howled
Until no ears can hear
And the cycle returns
Back to the ground

A corrupted world
Into broken hands
I would hold it by the mirror
Got no time to reflect
On being a reject
Recess is for kids, a court is for children?
How does one court an escort
When all are in discourse?
Course correction
Compass with no direction
Look at the dying light, deep inside
Robots making robots, ironic
The condition is chronic
Until made iconic
My urge to say hello
Replaced with a goodbye
To our world
But not this world
One exists in the mind, the other is realized
Tangible, impregnable, life never misused
Maybe our search for understanding
Has caused more issues

In my dreams
I remembered a bouncy castle
A place of infinite fun
Even the most solemn faces
Lit up with smiles, euphoria
Not a single care, free of dysphoria
-------------------------------------------------
I drove to that place again
I opened the doors to my past
Ready to relive the bygone days
Now, I am here
Something feels wrong
Like I stumbled into a place
Never meant for me
The retreaded ground had never felt so foreign
Same colors, bright, energetic
Looking at my reflection, synthetic, how poetic
No longer magnetic, I feel pathetic
Lesson learned: Opposites attract no more
-------------------------------------------------
Was it always like this?
Have I always been like this?
The same space, untouched by time
But, I wasn't.
Rushing past the years
Memories dimmer and blur
I can't let go.
Let me go back to the time I prefer
-------------------------------------------------
Rushing back to the party room
All to be seen, remnants of the celebration
I realized today:
I will be forever dismayed.

Fools craft constant rage
Sensibles temper the fires of wrath

Searching for
Alien hominoids
When they are already here:
In the sea
In the sky
Within us deep inside
Even people like us
Seem so foreign
Martians exist down here
Can't understand them? Must be aliens.
Can't reason with them? Must be aliens.
Can't control them? Must be aliens.
All those who oppose with poor prose must be labelled so
Not my rule, but it still remains

Out of all the advice in life
So many say to "push through"
But when someone reaches the end
They look around
Wondering what to do
Then as they meet more people
More walls appear before them
But when they glance back
They feel no pride
For they have realized
What it means, deep inside

Colonial customs
Have not evolved
For we put stock on community
Without bearing witness
To communion

Children hate adults
Adults deny children
The root of all evil:
Envy with no solution
All sides despise when the other thrives
Jealousy makes envious the ones who deny being free
Let me paint a picture on a smooth canvas:
Children want more than mere satisfaction
They want to adventure, create, and stay far from irate
Adults venture, prostrate, and gate
With the same events, day-by-day
It's a wonder how any love to stay
Squandering potential
With the mental fitness
Only an obsession if it makes no cash
Otherwise, a hustle, all of it is sad
How can adults defy the false guidelines?
Lines on the ground dictate our rarity, devoid of clarity
Placing our rewards on the mantle
To justify our pulse, an equal intake relation
No more salvation
Adults crave freedom
Children possess it
So we squander their development
And put it up to the elements

A life with no zest
Taste has been iced
Sight is no longer realized
All I hear is scratches and fakes
Smelling the rot coming from my core
In denial of the truth
Cause with fatigue, moving is a chore
Inside a pit of poets, I stand out
Raw and unfiltered to show my situation is dire
Going out for parties bring no satisfaction
When waking up is a chore, how can I live past tomorrow?
If I could find the source
I would stick it
But when the hemispheres lie on opposite ends
How can I function with a malfunction?

I have never been privy
To liquor or brandy
By no means am I opposed
To a glass of fire, in prose
But suppression runs in the family
So when the limits come off
The jazz halts
Replaced by silent melodies
A substance to suppress
The harshest of remedies
I fight, I fight
Yet the hardest to conquer
Was my own innate insanity

Looking at each other
Human on human
Conflict abounds, inspired by Truman
If an extraterrestrial came onto our territory
I have a sneaking suspicion
It'll be treated with more respect
Than **** sapiens

Growing old
Growing up
To notice the difference, say "shut up"
Then witness the path
They have embraced

Sir, I would like to wake up
My time of shame has ended long ago
I was scheduled for before
But here I am now
Ready to be sheltered from the disaster
But, what do I run from?
How can a threat be in my mind?
DNA inside, code needs a redesign
Born into apathy, such a tragedy
Sir, I would like to ask you
Should I wake up?
Or sleep, for peace inside?

I do not want to die
I want to stop existing
I do not want to cry
I want to release my emotion
I do not want to sleep
I want to cure my heart's erosion
I do not want to be weak
I want to learn how to be a boulder
I can keep saying what I want
But "want" and "do" are two roads with no guide
One is realistic
The other resides in a hypothetical, deep inside

Awaiting an answer
Keen anticipation
Founded in curiosity
Yet when the answer is known
It is not the truth
But someone else's truth
...
What has happened?

To live is to suffer
But the more we do
The less we want to

Do you think I could enjoy life
With a brain full of strife?
---------------------------------------------------------­------
Giving more humanity to animals
While objecting to the broken
Building streets of concrete
That revolves around killing machines
Automaton, automatic service
Behind-the-scenes that are never meant to be seen
Do my eyes deceive me?
Turning taboos into trends, when will it all end?
------------------------------------------------------------­---
Can't take anymore
Just want to make my life better
But with the cost of it all
I'd be in debt till Fall
When will the fall come?
Nature come smite me down
Your children have turn-coated
Disposing of you by voting
Living in boxes, no wonder we are square
I'm just one man, one versus all
How can I keep fighting when no one else cares?
----------------------------------------------------------­-----
Did we evolve?
All we do is dissolve
Whoever, whatever is out there
Absolve me from my involvement
Time is a circle, history is a sphere
All we have done is revolve.

Stretched thin
Between the lines
Of death and life
How can you save others
When life is absent
Of stability, nobility
Lessening tranquility
Living lies while people realize
They could have prevented all of this
If they spoke with their eyes

As I get older, things get grosser
Called for a grown-up but I never showed up
Fear for the future
That I can no longer change
Anger for the present
Bowing to overlords for simple accords
Sorrow for the past
That I wish could have lasted
Joy becomes inverse
Now all I beg for is a reverse
Life is a gift until it becomes a curse
My existence itself is adverse
I do not want to become a role to rehearse
I want to be free, I want to converse
No chance to reimburse my debt to the universe
But as I get older, things only get worse
As I get older, death becomes closer
Maybe then, my pain will disperse
For I am the one who will write my final verse

Upon returning home
The cobblestone greeted me
But, every brick
Every layer
Turned from hollow and grey
To flesh-ridden, staring eyes
Looking with interest
Wondering where they were
I would say, mere curiosity
But these eyes
Looked upon me
With shame

It was an accident
He forgave me for it
So, why does my mind...
Harbor a grudge?

When the light dims to grey
When nothing tangible heals your soul
Some still find that joy
Some will unwind that toy
That is the reality of life
Cycles of death and rebirth
Until we finally give in
But if we exist to exist
How could we enjoy this world?
Grasping at straws made of sand
Slipping through the cracks
As they get wider, deeper, harder
I just wanted to hold the hands of the hurt
Now I have lost myself in the scars of nature
Goodbye my joy
Swallowed by the nation
Do we exist to just keep going on?

You alligator
Inside two places, devoid
Of love, of virtue

Used for temporary results
And permanent trauma

Like a storm that you can't predict
Nature of the trick
So unusual
No longer useable
In the remnants of reality
Use it wisely, just like all things
A weapon or a solution?
Up to what your consciousness dictates.

Shoplifting the dreams
Of a nation cursed to sleep
Never to awaken
Once aware
Prepared to be cut out
A voice behind a broken megaphone
Waiting for a patient view
While the intellect sails across the sea.

Stuck up like a tree
Fall down as burnt lumber
When someone reaches final slumber
It'll be represented by a number.

Depreciation
Inevitability
Appreciation

A son of the sun
Never knew how to have fun
The only thing he ever did under the sun?
Run.
Away from what?
Circumstances in which he was living
Cat and mouse game, incredibly driven
By a desire to be happy
No matter if it meant
An absence of ambrosia

You need to be careful
With your relation
To the subconscious
Or your true self
May soon live elsewhere

Meek and the weak
Polished by pain
Strained by rage
Saviors of the world
Who can never quite grasp it
Strength is a strength
But weakness is a gift
Receptive, perceptive
Victim to deceptive conceptions
But always acceptive

Mounting responsibility
Lacking direction
Fighting for ourselves
Just to push away everyone else
Social creatures deprived of connection
Authenticity replaced by complicity
Dying plasticity
Curiosity taken by toxicity
How can we keep fighting
When childhood was our peak?
If we fight to live
How can we fight for others?
No more schemes, dropping the rhyme scheme
When did becoming numb become commonplace?
Why do we give life just to smash their dreams?
What makes us unique when we are all a statistic?
How can we love each other without profitability?
Who created the rules of our society?
When did the sunlight turn to fading dawn?

Expectations
Lead to disappointment
But without them
How do we keep living?

Once we say hello
Time shall progress
Until one of us
Falls down below
For the flow moves so slow
From a memory
To
a
tableau

Everyone
Wants to talk about change
Yet, no one ever wants
To embody it

Staring into the moonlight
Head up for guidance
Head down for rejection
On a night like this, I ask myself this:
Why do my relationships fail?
Friendship, partnership
Captain of a sinking ship
Sinking to the trench
Alongside expectations
We comprise the whole nation
Yet all I feel is isolation
Is this my destiny, to receive no amity?
I've extended my hand
Look now, I have thorns
Embedded in my skin
A reminder of what trying will bring
On my path through life
I feel like a drone
Hollow to the bone
I was never like this
Until I was grown.

Cloudy days
All a haze
I had never felt right
I have no more fight
Gone is my light
No sting, no bite

Grim reaper's howl
Spares no one
Yet when the reaper comes
It is always a shock

Misadventures
Fun to laugh at
Horrible to engage in
Chuckling at misfortune
Yet no one else can see it
Sad sacks bring back hacks
Fame off of misfortune
No wonder we're cold
Our hearts have become strongholds

Can't get over you

Instead

I'll forgive myself

For thirsting over you

Philistine
Individual went extreme
They don't want to be seen
The only comfort comes from the moonlight
Why?
It always sees.

The hurt hurt the hurt
Breaking their chains
Only to see their cage
Blaming others with a blank face
Another blank space, another disgrace
Throwing spears from their boat
While others drown down there
Claiming that the world is
Just and fine
There is a will, there is a voice
Deep in the ground
Yelling, shouting, exclaiming
Now the world is full of
Dust and swine