Hello, beautiful, brave one.

I know, your spirit is weak and weary.
Your soul feels shattered and broken.
And your heart feels damaged beyond repair.

You try to hide it, but the cracks in your smile show truly how broken you feel deep inside.
Your once bright eyes are now tired and worn from the harsh battles you have faced.

Just know, you are allowed to rest.
You are allowed to lay down your burdens for a moment and just exist.

Curl up, hide away and rest.

Your soul needs it, I can tell.

You don't like me?
You have an issue with me?

Well guess what???
**** it up, your opinions don’t matter.


You don’t know me.
Where I’ve been.
What I’ve faced…

You have never read the pages in the chapters of my life…
So until you do,

Don’t you DARE judge me.

You don’t know me, so your opinion ain’t worth ****.

7 YEARS

Darkness
Pain
Suffering
Growth
Newfound strength
Heartbreak

Fighting on and rising above

Love
Joy
Softness
Strength
Peace
tranquility

Living my life, because I can.
Because 7 years ago, I chose life.

I don't do new year resolutions

This year.

I want to love myself a little more each day.
I want to learn to be soft and gentle on myself, the way I always tell others to be for themselves.

Sometimes, I want to simply exist.

Other times, I want to make life happen

This new year,
I want to change.
I want to grow.
I want to flourish.

I do not think the world is truly ready for my transformation,
But I am, so here we go.

I know

You TRIED to break me…

You were slick… Using the very vulnerabilities I had shared with you to claw your way in and make me feel safe, and once that happened, you took your ******* mask off and the real you came out, like I knew was there in the past. I should have ran far and fast right when that happened, but you had your claws dug in so deep, I could not flee.

You knew you were never good enough, so to keep me, you had to break me down and reduce me to nothing, stripping me of all my power.
You had full control and called all of the shots.

Your hope was that when you drained me of my use and decided to leave, taking everything with you, the destruction you caused would permanently shatter me…

Well let me tell you, I have done so much work to heal and build myself back up…
To make you just a little blip in the timeline of my life, instead of a massive disaster.

Looking back, I do not remember any of the good times, because they were few and far between, and most of them were followed by a one way fight, you screaming and me just taking it…

So maybe it was just to spite you, or to **** you off, but after you left, I kept living…

I can’t for one second say that I wish you well… Because that would be the ultimate lie.
I wish you the life you have, and all the karma that comes with it.

These next words are like honey and Lavender coming from my mouth,
I survived you.

Hey little buddy. Listen here,
I know you still exist…

Somewhere deep within my soul, in the very core of my being, you reside,
I feel you, deep down,
You feel Scared, Broken, so small and in SO much pain.
The scars of the past still burn so deep.

I know, you couldn’t defend/protect yourself back then.
And you bravely stood alone against an army of those who turned their backs on you.
All you could do was survive, using all the energy you possessed to simply make it through each new day that you faced.

Well, just know this.
You survived. You made it out of that time when you didn’t think you could.
You didn’t think you had the strength to make it out.

I wanted to say thank you, for staying so strong and for not giving up.
On yourself or your future.

So here I stand, at your side and at the ready,
To fight for and protect you.
To honour you, to fight for you and to heal you.

And eventually, to lay you to rest.
You have done well, little one. Now, lay down your burdens…
I will take it from here.

You know, I have spent way too much time trying to be enough for EVERYONE else around me.
Thinking that my worth was based on their opinions,
how they see me as a person.

But the truth is, that is all *******...


I just need to be good enough for my own self,
and at this point, I am.

I am worthy
I am enough