Sometimes
I agree with your poem
Doesn't mean I like. . .

All this I hide
so you cant see
what lies inside
and bleed like me

my resignation
from this creation
wheres the compassion
within our actions

my resignation
from what is human
the end is looming
in all youre doing

Its a barrel on the tongue
a rope around the neck
pull the trigger
take the leap
wait for what is next

Its becoming sustenance
suicide by increments
the more it grows, the worse it gets
walking hand in hand with death

Its a razor to the wrist
water in the lungs
make the cut
take the plunge
let thy will be done

Its becoming evident
wounds showing the discontent
the more it grows, the worse it gets
as I lie here and bleed to death

All this I hide
so you cant see
what lies inside
and bleed like me

my resignation
from this creation
wheres the compassion
within our actions

my resignation
from what is human
the end is looming
in all youre doing

I believed in magic once
but I think it may have died
for I cant remember the last time
I looked into your eyes.

Those waving the banner of Democracy
Are those most duped
By the true shot callers
Whining about their trivial matters
Their minor inconveniences
Swallowing the lastest distractions
Shoved down their throats
By the powers that be
Regurgitations of that same old shtick
They were told to say
Like. . "Fighting for our freedom"
Or. . " If you don't vote you can't complain"
A ballot pull for an elected leader
Is as effective as thoughts and prayers
for some senseless tragedy
They wouldn't otherwise
lift a finger
to do anything about.
Both are just
Self-serving gratitudes
To stroke your delusions
One big circus circle ****
I have no interest in participating
I don't pick the clowns
I don't buy their stories
But I can still watch them dance
As the empire crumbles.

I used to carry writings
for her in my wallet
but now it is as devoid of poetry
as it is of money.

I wont decay in apathy
or partake in the lot
nor follow in the ways
of this mind numbing rot
If this is your definition
I have to insist
in refusing this mission
to carelessly exist.

I cannot count how many times
My wandering thoughts have laid to die
On winding roads, misleading signs
Their carcasses litter my mind
I cannot help but question why
You remain and do just fine
I found the truth so long ago
Yet somehow you keep a hold

I'll stay on edge
While you waste space
And air.

Just a prisoner
doing time
in his own mind
counting days
by scratching tally marks
on the inside
of the walls
that are his skull.

Chaos
has been
a better friend to me
than faith

Just
  save your *******
for someone
  you actually cared about

Its a phantom in my conscience
that haunts my evenings often
but is gone when the sun arises
where the tortures remain constant

I am not what you see
these were not my dreams
a cartoon buffoon for you
to point and laugh with glee

This isnt why I did this
I didnt know the expense
I put my heart for all to see
to verify my existence

Trying to exorcise my insides
by the tears that I cry
but it doesnt wash away
the pain within my mind

When most of these people
only see me for my alter ego
they want the struggling of my soul searching
to always remain feeble

So sorry Im untrusting
all I wanted was a friend
yet again when I have nothing
theyre all gone with the wind

Hollow another bottle
heres another *****
be our joker of sorrow
expose your madness some more

Youre here for our amusement
you have a gift so use it
split your personality
give us the one that self abuses

Why are you so quiet?
its not the Jeremy that I know
isnt it time to riot?
where is your red nose?

The only way
you could be seen
as a good person
is if
it was your perception alone
that changed the entire world.

I have been taught
not to be
a permanent fixture.

I know what I am. . .

I am uninterested
I am insecure
I am a manipulator
I am an introvert
I am a self saboteur
I carry a reputation for things
I dont even do anymore
who goes out of his way to hurt himself
and pushes away those who try to help
I act like a sarcastic *******
to ride the borderline
of seriousness
I am what the doctors would call
a high functioning alcoholic
I am a *****
I am lonely
I am seriously flawed,

but at least I am not you.

I want to **** the sadness
and strangle the heartache
which gives life to madness
not sure which is worse to take.

I feel I'm growing cold
is this getting old?
as the passions which I hold
stow slowly into stone

A crooked compromise
watching the demise
of love for younger times
eroding quickly with the tides

Holding to emotions
I wish would still arise
yet with every motion
swallowed more within my mind

Is this poem too simple?
Does it have no depth?
at least I carry words
there is no peace in breath.

She is lovely
and self admittedly
a little too crazy over me
many men
would probably see it as a trophy
being with such a creature
over a decade younger
they give me the nod and wink
for my conquest
but I just dont see as they do
and I am far too reluctant
to back track into my past
and re-obtain all the broken pieces
of my shattered heart
to give her the full love she deserves

Even the brightest of birds
Get used to their cage

The story was already told
sold so long ago
ending is enclosed
with a tale that no one knows

Can I control the characters fate?
Can I make whats in store?
It seems as if I am too late,
how long should one fight for?

How much of my soul has it stole?
I fold the cover over
fable done, stand as one

Still the story hovers.

Sitting here as the end rears
wish to not close this book
far or near
We still adhere

and choose just not to look

Afraid to turn the page
its the last of this chapter
stayed for whats an age
chasing every letter.

Do I submit the ending blurred
or admit to this confessing?
Do I choose to include her,
or leave everyone guessing?

Do I pretend no tragic end
is worth a farther pressing?

If loving you too much was a crime
I willingly admit my guilt
And I'm still doing the time
My memories of you
Are the cold steel bars I look through
From the back of my mind.

My sight was veiled by love
although I saw the truth
I closed my eyes to the signs
just as I always do

I turned a deaf ear
to the warnings they conveyed
not wanting to hear
of all the hearts slayed in your wake

and if they ask me why
I  still chose to pursue
I can only reply
that I saw so much more in you

Curse my need
to leave nothing unsaid
despite it changing
the outcome I so desire
Curse my soul
for its compulsion
to expose itself
to eyes of distrust
Curse my humanity
which leaves me
standing on the other side
of everything

Should I loathe myself for refusing to cater to the facade,

or should I loathe the others that do?

There are fates worse than death,
like living through it.

Thanks guys.
I dont know what determines making the daily poem.
but its the first time for me, and Ive been here awhile.
In the end, Im just happy to find people around who still appreciate poetry and take the time to read mine. Much appreciation, keep the purest expression of emotion alive!

Never buy a fifth Friday,
   you plan to drink Sunday.

Maybe she isn't real
the girl I saw in you
She would not make me feel
the way you often do
Perhaps you truly only
exist in my mind
the dream girl
who steals my lonely sleep
impossible to find

My Passion
which once burned bright as the sun
extinguished and collapsed on itself
becoming the black hole
that created this void.

Fiery mind
or icy veins
can be a downfall all the same
Cold heartedness
or burning passion
can lead to similar dissatisfaction
As the storm clouds start to form
my blood simmers to lukewarm
all that I was fighting for
doesn't matter anymore
I must disown the love I sworn
for this dysfunctional repertoire

You cant hurt me anymore
there is nothing left to harm
your charms no longer cause alarm
your spell has been disarmed

You cant hurt me anymore
What can you inflict?
little left to detriment
with your infectious gift.

You're only stabbing the corpse
Of something you already killed

Go ahead, make the cut
just make sure its deep enough
Go ahead, tie the noose
just make sure to tighten the loop
Go ahead, throw the switch
just make sure to finish this
Send the bullet through and through
just aim true before you shoot
Complete what you once began
and maybe I can live again
I've died too many times before
and tire of this repertoire

What fun is life really,
with it all figured out?

Just a bumbling bee
who purposely flies
into the same web
he managed to escape
time and time again
even if only
to gaze upon
the hourglass
of the black widow
who only wishes
to bleed him dry

If only it was real
if only it was true
Made to feel its me
but most is probably you.
If only I was wrong
if only this was right
if only we belonged
Where we pictured in our minds
If only you would answer
if only you would show
While this grows like cancer
Killing in its throes

For a short, and glorious time
  The world was yours
     The world was mine
Until we started drawing lines
beyond what we could define.
Waiting for stars to align
in hopes to see some kind of sign.

It seems as if
everyone strives to be inhuman
terrified of their own thoughts
and emotions
So much that we would rather
feign perfection
than accept our faults

Gods ******* children
seeking the affections
of a father figure
that is indifferent
to their wants and needs

I will never
write a poem
with the curves
and grace
that you possess. . .
or the thoughts and feelings
you instill on me
How can a man
describe or imagine
a woman who surpasses
the girl of his dreams?

I've destroyed myself so many times
Daily, at ease behind enemy lines
With only me, myself and I
amongst thieves, assassins, spies
picking at my enterprise
finding comfort in the lies
contorted truths, flow through just fine
and mine are the best of its kind
I have tried to question why
but my queries become sacrifice
Why should I try breaking ground
where life seems to be scarcely found?
How is one to build a home
with nothing but a stepping stone?

I want a million likes, thumbs ups, plus so and so
from those that I don't know
I want them to follow
I hope they come in droves
Fall in love with my mask
laugh at my cartoon character
let me sit and bask
kissing *** of a stranger
show me your pretty images
of your picture perfect lives
leave me in my guilty bliss
where my detachment thrives

I deny god by the image he presents,
not existence.

Society
it beats you down
With so much
running between
fairy tales
dreams
and commitments
that were seldom our own
Until they were beaten
into our skulls from a young age
But once you start carving notches
in the box they have you living in
or stick your finger through
the pinhole
We look at the universe with
it is hard to go back
to what you once believed
as you search for connection
in a world full of people afraid
to look out the window.

As I stared at the *****
stainless steel toilet
shining under neon light
from a concrete slab
in my small enclosure
I thought to myself. .

There is a poem in there somewhere.

The forbidden fruit
has long since
rotted from the vine

With passing time
the paint begins to crack
and slowly peels away
Revealing a tainted canvas
of what you really are
as opposed to how I pictured you
I try to figure out
what is more heartbreaking,
Who you really are
or what I wanted to see.
The angel plucking my heartstrings
its lovely sirens song
or the Demon
who ripped them away
leaving a silent void.

You were just a tool
a device for me to use
an excuse
a morose and twisted muse

My artistic ruse
a scapegoat for me to point at
for my own self abuse
another bad habit

I knew your words were lies
So I figured why cant I?
A lustful premonition
a loveless alibi

I knew you couldn't save me
I knew you couldn't help
I always knew that your ambitions
only served your self

There was never an us
ever a you and I
there was never trust
just two criminal minds

So I chose to play the victim
labeled myself a toy
I see the colors of your prism
there was nothing to destroy


*I can only assume you ladies liked this because I'm obviously a terrible liar

In a blurry haze
I drunk dialed god
of course he didn't answer
and his voicemail box was full
I'm just another with incoherent ramblings
of his abandonment
that goes unheard
No sappy admissions
of missing how he used to make me feel
or how empty I have been
since his departure
Even his own son
felt forsaken by him
So I suppose I shouldnt expect any better
Now I remember
why I don't call him anymore