Pretending not to care seems to be the easiest route for those with bigger hearts. Although, you come to find as you walk that road the pitfalls are much more dangerous.
I knew I was far from perfect as were you to everyone else when it came to US I can not say you were the girl of my dreams it would be an injustice to you considering you surpassed what I could imagine, but I suppose despite what we consider perfection whatever our conception of it might be remains to be imaginary
As I look upon a broken sky very much as I showing hues of midnight blue the stars weeping bright my soul sits here in darkness but my eyes still seek the light.
Every time I swallowed my pride I let down my guard I exposed myself all for one person it killed me inside a little more yet it all was intensely perfect your presence that ran electric current through every tip of my being the taste of you forever on the tip of my tongue returning me to the nape of your neck all these words spoke that can be used against me remain worth the sacrifice
My heart hurts and Im not sure whats worse the pain that remains or that I disperse I try not to spread that which is in my head should I try to ignore or share the ache instead? Who would that make? Is that me? Why can I not shake this discrepancy. I hide with a smile questioning the worthwhile I feel like a fake just an unsure child Have I known who I am? Whats left to be shown should I give a ****? I have built a wall and Im still adding bricks wondering if this all I should just submit
Perhaps I went too far I have no excuse nor any regret for it led me to the truth If I never took that step that went beyond the line I would still be left with all the empty minds.
You were the biggest con I ever pulled but something happened and in between that time we were too deep in the charade for me to be honest and believable at the same time and I played into your score teasingly just to see who was better two thieves in love and afraid of each others powers even though we saw it all from the beginning.
All that attracts us, repels us. my only edge. . is that I've given up the game.
I see your shadows without light I hear the echo of your whispers I know what you dream at night and what makes them occur I know the star you wish upon and what those dreams are I know all your imperfections and every single scar I know the fears that you face and which ones give you chase I know the truths that you embrace and the ones that you deter I know that which you reject and that which you prefer
Mike works at my liquor store down the street I see him almost every day in my stops on the way home from the shop He has basically known me for most my life back when I was buying sodas and candy instead of cigarettes, and alcohol. I can basically walk in and say "A fifth and a pack" and he grabs my Crown Royal and my Newports I might as well just use "The Usual." but he is always polite enough to ask "What are we doing today Jeremy?" knowing that I switch it up time to time I've come to realize the routine all too well and just wish sodas and candy still did it for me.
I only envision you in my mind because I cant see you with my eyes I'm only with you in my dreams because its not a reality I only hold you in my heart for our reach is just too far apart Maybe I should let it go these memories become my throes
Yet still they seem to make me whole. just as they did so long ago
Maybe I wont But maybe I might Exhasting this course Forced and contrite My mind screams flight My heart sings fight My silent soul torn between This never ending plight.