Everyone seems to be in a dying mood lately
Fragile love stories
And how your hearts were broken

I get it
You want a different kind of love
A different story
Your own fairy-tale
A different happy ending
But

You chose to drown in miser
Suffocate in unspeakable pain
Craving for hate

Then what?

I might be Carter
a fallacious poet
who wrote you when you were broken
devoured in pit of hell
but still scratching for light

I might  be Born
a reborn creature awakened from slumber
with a soothing tone
slowly reaping your speck of hope

I might be him/her
the one who feeds you love poems
Enticing broken promises
and a promise of a happy ending

Sometimes my heart just skips
with sorrow and fear
of so many unpredictable events


My life hardly flashes in front of me anymore
everything is slowing suddenly
was I a worthy creature
did I earn my very existence

Am filled with questions and regrets
the world is possibly never going to be a better place
I open my eyes and I see him been devoured
I close them and I don't hear anything
they are all immuned to pain

I wonder
Is life really worth living?

they wonder
if there was ever a light at the end of the tunnel
they don't have fairy stories anymore
Maybe a quick death is a show of mercy
and these are the best fairy tales they have


When they took him
He cried out loud
Please shoot me, don't let them take me
you know what they'll do!

Someone from the crowd shot him
they all starred with no tears
they knew he's better dead than alive

Excruciating agony they felt


Is this what love is?

You told your lie
Often enough
that you believed it
to be the truth

But I can't have that
I can't have any of that

I can't have desolation
Sorrow
Pain
and tots of regrets

Lord
give me some refuge

All my refuge are lonely

I couldn't get a moment of relief


My loneliness follows me
around like  a shadow

Fact or fiction

Reality or illusions

lately the line has been
a little too blur

I have these poignant thoughts
about my life
the future is scary

More scary now
that my eyes are wide open


I can't close these gate
I can't close these chapter
I can't close these door

It has to happen
I know it has to happen
It painfully has to happen

Why should I cry
He did this to himself

Am not sad
why should I be

It's a beautiful night
the weather is nice
and am enjoying my cigarette

Why do I call you baby

        and think about ending us

         why is it
I'd rather destroy this heart that craves you
than let you stay in


                    this is it
                    hand me a knife
                    I seem happy-ishh


I used to complain that your killing me
now am happy that your killing me

                   I got fine with dying
                   I don't need fake hopes
                   Or illusive love fairies

evil  in me
Maybe it's the pain  in me
smoked and addicted
to nothing
but an

Ashtray

reduced to nothing
but specks of ash
an ash wondering
from cigarettes of long time ago

Hand me a note
Of a cynic brother
about the wars we've fought
the blood we've split
and the ones that bonded us together

I am a sinner
with dashing looks
a serpent smile
and a lust greater than a vampire

I hear them cry
when I close my eyes
I see their voids
Desperate
Desperation is all they cling to

I am a sinner
With a beauty voice
and an army of corpse behind  me

I sin for a better course
just like you lie for a better tomorrow
just like a mantra

many things left unsaid
but for sure
these life is uncertain

Sometimes death hurts less than  life