We were barely starting our journey when it ended
Snuffed out, holding candles in the rain
Running from the rest of our lives
Anything to live and be free in the moment right?
Hand in hand, we ran so far away
Up and down the campus streets
Lined with rain?
Sure, but lined with life!
Alive with each other
the light behind each others eyes
Shouldn't have been compared to the streetlights
The concrete gods, angry at the pale skin pigs
who dared to defy their will
Slowly drained the light from your eyes
And no doubt you saw the same in me
And now that we meet in the moonlight
Our eyes only reflecting the earthen natural light
A pale imitation of what it used to be
We say goodbye for the final time
We cant pretend anymore
We can't try to be happy now
It's time to start living again
With no hands but or own

The air is saturated with an uneasy alliance
People stopped talking to everyone else
and everyone is splitting into groups
for better or worse
who is to say
The family is slowly falling apart
brothers against brothers
sisters against sisters
remember in the beginning?
when we all could stand each others company
yeah, maybe back then was full of heartbreak
but at least we could try and talk to fall in love
yeah, maybe we were all a little to fake back then
but that fear made us revealing ourselves so much more special
The family is slowly falling apart
And the ones like me are the only ones
Who dared to pick up the parts

I need help
Those thoughts that you aren't supposed to have
The ones they give you pills for
Are starting up
And sometimes I find myself listening
And I'm scared I'm spiraling out of control
I'm scared of being alone
I'm scared of being alive
I've pushed everyone so far away that no one can tell there is a problem
They just see what I want them too
I'm too afraid of letting the world see me weak like this
I'm so afraid that I'm one bad day away from doing something I don't want
The episodes before this were few and far
Now I've never stopped having one
I've been felling this way for three months
I need help before its to late
I need to find you before its to late

This shouldn't be happening again
These nights sobbing
The hours just staring off into space
The only difference this time
Everyone I'd ever turned too is gone
Sure, I could call them up
But it's 2:30 and I've lost touch with most of them
And it's all my ******* fault
I was only with them a few months ago
I thought I was so miserable back then
But I can only wish that someday I'm half as happy as I was back then
I don't think anyone of them would recognize me now
I'm a shell of my former self
I was a good person with them
Or at least I attempted to be
How would they recognize me
When j can't stand to forgive myself for my sins
Three months...
I've hurt, manipulated,and destroyed people
I can't get close to anyone
Not after what I've done to everyone
So I'll lay here
Home for the weekend when I easily click have stayed
Trying to hide my problems from my parents because they have more important things going on right now
Dead silent, as anyone I would go to
Anyone who would tell me that it's going to be okay
Is our living life
And forgot about the kid who tried to forgot about them

Let the pitch black room comfort me
Another wasted semester
Spending too much wasted
And wasting away to much
All the talks didn't help
The pills never felt more *****
Even when they kick in
I don't recognize the man I've become
And the pills are making me sad
And the sadness makes me want more pills
And I need to get away
Stop swallowing these poison
I need to go to New York
And I need to find you

Slowly falling out of sync
The hands are no longer aligned
We lie awake at night
Asking why we did the things we did
We look into each others eyes
And recognize only the memories of the person
Drifting all alone in the universe
We thought we were lucky to find someone else
And we were for the longest time
Until your eyes stopped reflecting the stars
And the gravity of the situation tore us away

Here alone again
Different from last time
Getting back from just hanging out
Instead of hanging out just to get back
College has changed me
Perhaps too much
Maybe not enough
I wonder if anyone back home would recognize me
I winder if they ever think about me
Do they miss me? Those friends of mine
We promised that although we were going across the state
That we would never stop being friends
All of us and our promises
Like the soft sound of raindrops on the window
Slowly falling away, until they all collect
and then fall away all together