The two paths
Lay there peacefully
Quietly teasing you
Taunting you...
Your decision  couldnt affect them
In any way...

The two paths
Lay there
Stretching as far as the eye can see
With nothing in view


The two paths
Lay there as two paths
Not knowing
Never knowing
How they taunt me night and day

2nd month

Feburary 2013:

its been so cold
lately, our skin get goosebumps
we hide under your covers
and hug it out till the summer
theres something telling me " you're  the one"
i still can't believe I'm the one
who gets to hold you,kiss you
run my hand through your black hair
and stare deep into your eyes

and i can't take it!
my love, you make me crazy
with the way  you smile
and stare
darling we've  said so many times
but i can say it forever more

My arms turned to clouds

and i fell asleep

in the warm snow

with the thoughts of my past

melting away

I never thought I would be
Staring at the stars
laying on the frozen grass
Or running after the night
With you

At night
When world bursts with beauty
And when our cold lips touch
My bones shiver

Shiver
With happiness

There's nothing left

Just us two

Holding hands

Prepared to survive

"We can do it"
"We can do it together"
We repeat it like a song

We are ready

As we hold hands

my skin has been dripping from my pillow
to the wood gaps on my floors
the sun creeping through my curtain
my room is dark a bit of shine comes in
and rests upon my tanned skin
and fingers are floating
the music is honey to my brain
i think of you in the deepness of my coffee
i see you glimmering
smiling me that smile
you have
i wanna  laugh with you
right now
and let the clouds become  a place
of pure numbess
in your trembling in your arms

like paint in the wind,
leavings tracks of colour
tracks of happiness...

your lungs are talking
making you cry

your brain is singing

your bones tighten

teeth glowing

heart pouring

filling the world
with your beautiful laughter

I want to go through life
like a breeze
not caring for anything
and the puzzle pieces
fall in there places
as i stretch along my years
but to many things happen
all at once
trying to make myself feel happy and free
but when all the pieces fit
there's always that one that breaks
and will never fit

...i lost a friend today...
on a rainy day....but i did not cry
but i wish i did
...i wonder what i did...

....and i wanna walk up to the girl
that i love and kiss her....
but my fear of reality kicks in....
and i never do anything....
i wish i did though.....
but am stupid cause i want to
know everything...
and i know thats bad....

oh what a day
oh what a day...

i want to cry
but
i can't....

The sun Fell
Each step burning
The heat nibbles at my feet
And my bones
Buried under leaves
And you cold hands
Wrapped around me

Hanging over me
The drops of  melting years

Dreams becoming cold
Lingering words
Lingers on my mind
I have no choice now
But to hug my sins
That are driving me old

Memory's of that afternoon
Breaks Through like a wave
Escaping now
Disappearing now
old days...

Talk to me
With the sound of your teeth
Eating at my nerves

Wanting to breath
Under water,
Burnt liquid
Troubles my guts

Oh how i love
To see you glimmer
Over the city

Turning tight
Forever forgot
Fast alive
gasping for love...

Hey,stop
Painting on your knees
Hey,stop
Breaking your fists
Who are you?
Who are we?

In the rush of childhood
I think we are all selfish
And just want everything now
And we don't appreciate small things as much

I feel as so
With everyone in my life
I don't care as much as I should care
I feel like I put on a show
.....

I wanna feel  every emotion
Love everyone like should love
Grasp my childhood and slow it down

I only live one **** time

I always liked
Walking in snow
while it snows very hard

The feeling of snow sleeping on my black messy hair
and my pants frozen and wet
of  all the snow reaching up to my knees

While everybody stays under blankets
warmed
and
relaxed
drinking coffee
staring at the falling snowflakes

i stand out
covered in snow
like i am waiting for some miracle

i guess am waiting for her
that girl to come up behind me
tapping my shoulder

gently turning my head
she'll be there
with her blue  crystal eyes
burning me

and we'll kiss
while
the
snow
bury's
us
under

i dont know if i hate the whole world

or the whole world hates me

rainy days are peaceful inside your house
in your bed
sleeping

but rainy days are always adventure of the unknown
once you step outside

It's starting to feel comfortable
Passible
Starting to feel  a little less..."weird"
With My surroundings
I still feel disconnection
From something
From somewhere
Something picking at my brain
I need to mold  myself still

But it's starting to feel comfortable
Tolerable

But I still feel a disconnection.

From someone

"No I'm not "
She says
Sadly and disappointed with herself
"But you are!"
I say
Confidently that her beauty kills me slowly everyday

You can point out your flaws
But I see beauty and perfection
I've said it already too much
That the words don't even mean anything
If seeing is believing
I would do anything
To show you my love
That you're beautiful!!!
Even if  you have flaws
So do I!
Our imperfections make us perfect

You are
You are you are

I wish there was an action
To show you my love
That you are
Beautiful

you have those lips

you have that hair

you have that smile
that makes me turn

you have those eyes

you have that feeling of warmness

and you have that feeling that gives
my skin bumps

and i only saw you once
walking past me
on  a thursday afternoon
in a park
as i sat on a bench
looking at the clouds

intense clear blue eyes you have
i can get so lost in them
black hair just like mine
but mine shines brown in the sun
bitten fingers nails
just like my nails
lips so puffy like a cloud i could sink into them
layer of soft skin
just around your belly
or better said around you're whole body
i love you're skinny legs
that wrap my torso
i love youre red fingers(cause its so cold)
that scratch my head
when i have my whole head planted into youre belly
oh i could keep on going...

And you have a stressful family life
just like me
but i hate to see you teary eyed
my beautiful girl

" it depresses the hell outta me"

above you
and you look at me, as if your waiting
waiting...
grasping my shoulders
you pull me in
our skin was touching
heating up,
your red nails dug into my back
but i loved it
your breathing hard
my mind cant take
im going crazy...
your blonde hair smells like fresh strawberrys
i could taste  it on your tongue

i cant get you out of my mind

****...