I gasp for air at the very thought of him, I try to speak but only start stutterin.
I try to keep calm and balanced, then I mumble some random nonsense.
Baffling my mind like I'm dreaming, can't even stand straight, you got me leaning.
But then you catch me as I'm falling,and even if I fell, to you I'd be crawling.
A magic carpet ride, with a genie. An abstract painting with such a deep meaning.
You are the spark to my wand, the smallest droplet of ink in my pond.
The entire meaning of what's in the words fond. as smooth as James Bond!
You captivate me with inspiration, vendication, insecurities, you eliminate and deface them.
As light as a snowflakes your laughter. As bold as the mountains, there's the capture.
Beauty, tranquility, and peace.To the top of the Ice cap's peak.
My heart lies fragile, there in a glass jar.As it remains here enjoying the serenity
and the infinite amount of shooting stars.

Here we are discriminating forms of art and poetry.
Denying each other acceptance
and credibility.
Judging how we talk, or rhyme,
or how dope our flows should be.
Coming in and criticizing.
Basically falling just short of micromanaging.

We all strive for the same types of things.
Wasting time and energies.
Spitting venom still.
How we representing 'unity'?
When each others pride we ****?
Do you even feel?

I mean feel........the lyrics?
What we may be saying?
Pay attention to the vibes,
and different tracks that we're laying?
Dissing opponents,
never shaking hands.
Who ever is bigger and badder,
is the winning man?
Dam that is a mentality I never could fathom.
Want or need some props,
here ya go you can have em'.

You see, for me.
I'd rather keep the peace.
Give you a hug or a fist bump,
I'll love you like we're family
For you, and you, and all of them.
Someone else who just might need a friend.
Someone to sync with.
Someone to help them glow.
Maybe connect everyone,
with a common knowledge or flow!
Hell I don't know!
But I'll dream.
Create a beautiful lucid scene.
Where every one is welcome
up on my shoulders to lean.
So pace yourself while labeling,
to your perceptional liking.
But show some respect.
You never know,
who they might be.

So I don't apologize for,
not being 'hard' ya'll.
Because life's hard enough,
without pointing out flaws

That moment I felt like I couldn't breathe.
Everything I felt and thought left me.
My mind and soul, suffocating.
The very minute the phone started ringing.

Just a blink in my eye, you had vanished.
The desperation I felt, couldn't stand it.
Never know how the hell I will manage.
No mending this depth of damage.

It's been unstable for me since you been gone.
No matter how many drugs that I been on.
None of them ever numbed this pain.
It's just to strong.
Wish I could have said my 'So long'.

I'm sorry if I failed you now.
Things have been rough since you ain't around.
The songs I heard no longer make a sound.
Never thought I'd hit the ground,
rock bottom,
I was meant for space bound.

I wonder this Earth now so lonely.
Feeling a lot like I'm the only,
one who understands or even cares,
to even know me.
I wear this heavy burden.
Smile while I'm hurting.
Act as though I can manage,
then cry as my back is turning.

Maybe I should seek some therapy.
In a nut house is where I'd be.
You see.
I'm ashamed to be grieving.
In fear of letting down your legacy.
All the 'sympathetic' 'love' I would be getting.
Would set me off,
end up in house fires,
I'd probably be setting.

I know you wouldn't be to shocked at this.
If it was your's that is missed,,
you'd feel this twist.
When your heart doesn't just break it shatters.
Into a thousand micro pieces,
then like that, black confetti,

Your emotionally scattered.

Battered, tattered, feeling like the mad hatter.
And as time goes on,
I become madder and madder.
Wishing I could go back in time,
just to hear your laughter.

It fades like a record,
from the good old days,
scratchy, and warped,
the more I try to make it play.
I know it will never sound the same.

Wish you could see how far I've came.

Concrete Foundations, Built for us,
Founded and Created Cons, Buried, now crushed,
under the same concrete, created, to maintain a fond nation.
For us? We trust, in none of them, they disgust,
they all just smile with their mouths sewn shut,
hiding behind stitched mouths, teeth knocked out,
pulling their ***** back out, to fu..
fundamentally set standards, they deemed a must
drinking rust, water spouts the wells been poisoned somehow.
Armies of men stationed, wives and kids despise, his,
atomic attacks, all bones with no back, who's side white brown or black?
Air Raid sirens to sound as smoke arises,
blow, it out, of
The Trumpet's brass?
Much like anything that comes out of his ***, he needs put in a cast,
not meaning the role he's playing, after all he is about his ratings.
Look at all the sitcoms out of yal he has created. ha
I don't discriminate, however brass, leaves a bad after taste,
like, not really my instrumental choice,
unless its ****** knuckles, I'm more of a percussionist
beat them all with the drum
sticks, *****, chicks, wake the **** up, dumb little b..
bench/, warmers...where they sat us, playing on an Iphone,
not paying attention, so much distraction, you twit nits,
twittering, snap, chatting,
*** and **** pics, what's wrong with that pic,
living in a photoshopped world, come watch the games now,
that the score board is 'fixed'
same players no touchdowns, losing, yet forced to
cheer and chant their names, they win, don't you dare frown,
becoming restless, keeping us mentally sick and poor,
kids blocked by a wall with a white guarded door,
floor is slick, spilled some orange paint all over it,
flick the ashes, like your nasty cigarette habits
Does your hope float? because mine don't, nope,
but were all stuck in a bubble, can't float when your caught under the rubble,
smells like they better call Hillary, something is fishy,
oh wait that's her and Trump's chemistry mixing.
I'm probably gonna get some backlash for this,
especially because the fact of it is,
this house is divided into unequal shares,
yal walk around as if nobody lives there,
It's like leaving the lights on but nobody is home,
tear down the wall crush them with the same heavy stones.

Demons surround me surging darkness through my space,
cornered me inside mirrored four walls, no exit to escape,
no doors for fleeing, no windows, I'm confined,
for the darkness incarcerates me,
eradicates my mind,
I feel the cold emptiness that festers within,
it captivates and consume me,
I need a remission of my sins,
If I would have know the burden I'd carry,
making deals with the demons,
and all the devils I've married,
signing contracts exchanging, more like donating my soul,
they extort, deceive, while I forfeit control,
confusion compounds my light and dark into grey,
demons whisper me messages I don't want to convey,
I cover my ears hoping it muffles the voices,
remembering it's my fault, should have made better choices,
So here I am stuck with no God to beg my pardon,
I wish now I could just once visit Eden's Garden,
now dancing like a puppet, this boxed stage makes me claustrophobic,
so many mirrors make my true reflection out of focus,
trapped here for eternity, they got me strung on strings,
like I'm here for their amusement as my body swings,
back and forth the demons sway me,
grimace smile as I play,
will someone come and save me,
I've forgotten how to pray?

Gallantly riding along with my sidekick Gandolf, bold and strong, 'ride or die' t'il his hoofs fall off'.
Onwards we journey throughout the finally quite valley, silencing all the wild, yal stuck in a 'blind alley'.
Pondering back in memories around a campfire, a time once I was wreckless and robbing moonshiners.
I smell the wood burning and the embers crackling. reminiscing old days before I was backtracking.
Twiddling my doorknob mustache I wish I had. Bar fights and gun slings, in my side tipped hat.
I'm on the run now Sherriff can't catch me, were out stomping ground, like it's a stampede.
Found myself in a bind, with my cantine, and my satchel, been wanted an outlaw, for slaughtering you cattle.
Rode all night with a bunch of drunken bandits, tried to cheat me in poker, but I was left handed.
See I cleared all this land, with 44's to their chests, most precise 'bar slinger' this side of the west.
Spitting 'bars' in a saloon now that's a new style, try and crowd around me, I'll exit you out of existence, single file.
Your 'rowdy cowboys' smell of cigars, *****, and perfume. I'll hang you out back without dignity of a tomb.
Ringo, Django, Buffalo Bill, I don't concern with who you are, and that's the real deal.
Status means nothing to a revolving gun, my mind is my weapon, so I hope you can run.
You go to hell, you go to hell and you die, don't fret old pals, I'll sing your wife and kids goodnight,
kiss them and tuck them in for you, ignoring her cries for me to 'just spare her one true'.
I must be so fortuitous, unless I'm just not new at this, nah, I've done this numerous.
I heard them call out ' drinks on me' well if you would stop spilling it, and hitting on Bonnie.
Where the **** is Clyde, banging a *******, I'd kick his teeth out with my combat cowboy boots.
Why the **** is everyone so 'Bonnie and Clyde' robbing banks and fleeing, with a two faced ***** by your side.
Yeah they got your sides, while shooting you in the back, staring at your face, you hit the pavement then...smack..
Hard cold reality hits you in the face, undermined my intensity, my emotions enrage.
I'll burn your whole town you son of a witch, now hop along Cassidy, you flipped off the wrong switch.
I walk into this new place, everyone stops, they know who I am, but their jaws about to drop.
I take off my trench coat, revealing curves, what this cowboy, is really a her.
Taking my hat off, my pinned hair falls, hiding my face so they can't see my flaws.
They gasp in shock, who is this gal, this lady?
Whistling a tune, to the real Hello Daisy.

just an average typical morning within this same old town
avoiding all the neighbors that nosily creep these grounds
while all these other folks keep busy bodying gossiping and all
who has whiter teeth, bigger *****, or the cutest guy at the mall
i stopped at the library to dodge all these illiterate snots
the only place that's quite enough for me to organize my thoughts
i walked in just to be stopped, breathless, dead in my tracks
a book, not made of paper or even hard back
binding was some type of stitched authenticism
bound with a beautiful articulate collage of pattern to it

I thought
same old stories, same old narrative
can someone tell me where all the good authors went
I just need an outline, no critique or edit
but everything I read, I feel I have already read it

I stood there for a second, which felt like a lifetime
must have been reading stars, because it left my mind blind
if only just once I could hold that masteredpiece written classic
I can't lie it was perfect man, I just had to have it
I gasped for a moment, dead in my body
frozen and stunned hoping nobody saw me
it crossed my mind for a split, then, I thought
nah ****
if I get caught I'd be a goner, but I just couldn't wait any longer

I thought
same old stories, same old narrative
can someone tell me where all the good authors went
I just need an outline, no critique or edit
but everything I read, I feel I have already read it

I darted for that case in a flash and I shattered that glass
busted it open, like I was late for literature class
static shocked a little as the book touched my hand
it was in that moment i knew i was the #1 fan
then it wasn't long I realized it was written for me
initials imprinted so there was no questioning

I thought
same old stories, same old narrative
can someone tell me where all the good authors went
I just need an outline, no critique or edit
but everything I read, I feel I have already read it

I fell deep into the title it really 'hit a line'
bold, italics, with a dedication underlined
I wasn't sure why I needed or wanted to own it
but I would have searched forever if I would have known it
searching every library for a perfect story
all the titles and endings just really seem to bore me
this one was special I just wanted to trace over the print
read. every small detail. no need for suspense