I love you for many reasons & yet we've hardly meet,
I proceed from recognition of your beauty & appreciation of
"Our" what could have been(s).

From conversations past,

You
exist in reality-  only your not at my side,

Miles
away you are & afar I still love you
Doubt
me not
because I know these feeling be true.
I'm asking nothing  of you
just keep me in the loop,

I really shouldn't say this but
Babe
I have a need for you.

Weather
it's in poetic verses or sweet flowery words,
I need to hear you in writings or even on messenger.
How do
I love you wonder ,questioning our fate but again
I say doubt me not for my love will stay the same.
I like you more then just a little bit,

Love you forever if that would be your wish.
I hope
I'm not speaking out of turn but
my body yearns for you & what's crazy
is
I never personally meet you.
Yet I hold back desires-   which are purely  lust.
I keep my distance with out
choice but someday
I know soon,
We'll
be closer and better friends

Even if for now my love
for you's
Platonic !
(or is it?)
Always Me Ayeshah

How to write an English poem

Well this is what I do,

I listen to my dear friend "Jon"

Then I go about copying him.

He says  Good-marrow My to Thy lady

I laugh & reply back Hath thee fared well,

Like I'm in  Shakespeare's  Macbeth.

I love how

He uses "thou" different then myself

I say thou in sense of  "even though"

translations are must

to understanding my friend!

He speaks in

Cockney- crockery riddles

Yet some how I understand.

I doth not speak to make

fun of him

for I love his English gib,

I listen while learning

to write a sonnet since.

How to write an English poem.

I listen to Sir "Jon's"

witty sense of humor  

His cloaked sarcastic'ness

as he talks in general,

Saying such this as

Aroin't thee & Blimey ole chap

as if I know'th what he means.

How to write an English poem

Well frankly it's a pickle of a thing,

I say I doth rightly know lets ask'th

Sir"Jon & see!

He say'ith to me

"change your "****** dialect"....

And

when he's spitting made

He yells

O' God Save the queen.

He also talks of frippery

& ask if I'd like a spot of tea

when asking me questions

he laughs & quotes

such things like ;

" cheeky" little beggar or monkey

as "IF" I

know what he means.

Funny thing is though

Sir "Jon'

never really

******* told me

How to write an English poem

(so answers to every-ones question- I'd say walk around & say top of the morning,
ole chap & blimey, Even things like Bristol Cities & things likes this don't forget your "TH" s  
addressing your selves  a lot & put emphasis on every other syllable  & thing!)

Well dear Sir "Jon"
I am not  a British Bolk  
Just A YANKEE- New Englander
oh & a NuYorican
Ta Boot

So next when  I see You
****** Friend  tell me-  
How to write an English poem !?!
Always Me Ayeshah

Lady & Lord Dawson

presumably

lived quite

peacefully,

until one day-

Lady  Dawson announced ;

" Forsooth"

Thy Lord Husband

Ti's heavy a heart I bear-

I spied

Thy self without powder or wig,

Not in thy house-

Betwixt an-others arms

Thy Lord Husband

& thy

Scullery Maid in

thy own barn"

Betwixt looks

on thee tempestuous

pocked face

Never rakishly looked to

Thee own Lady  

Wife the same

Not

Thee be sad  

Thy heart never break

For

Thy love never came.

Marriage  of  

Thy

Parents wishes

&

Thee inheriting

Thy gain!

Lady & Lord Dawson

" Lived"

Quite

Peacefully.............

(possibly 2 be continued)

Always Me Ayeshah

TRAPPED,STUCK,

CAUGHT IN TWO PLACES,

IN THE MIDDLE AND LIKING IT MORE
than
I should,

Liking the control and the power of love,
Being in lust & being in love,
Being in lighten

Courageously in awe of these new feelings,
I'm well
let me say it this way,

I love "him" for so many different reasons,

I love him the OTHER dude- too for

"other" reasons,

My Love

is the same YET so completely different.
In-Love with one & Lusting for another,

Intimacy is concurred in the arms of my Lover,

All the things You used to do is now replaced,

My miss trust and all the things "he" do used to be US,

See I wont leave You & can't give "him" up,

You know
of him and "he" knows
I used to be in-love, with you,
In lust with the likes of you too,
You both think
I'm with out the other ,

If only you 2 knew !

Trapped in this triangle
was something I never wanted,

Yet here I am

Caught torn between whats right
and my like of love,
for one verses
My lust for the other,

Deceit ,

Miss guiding lies.
I played my cards & now I have you both on either side.
How
can I choose when both of you make me whole,
Make a complete package
with out the both of you there is no 100% not even 80% ,

50% for you and for 50% for"him".

I melt when"He" touches me ,

I cry when this one leaves,

I fight for "his" attention,

I beg for that ones peace,

I crave his wisdom,

I long for this "ones" excitement,

I adore this ones wilder adventures,

I linger for "his" anticipation's,

I dream of his body,

while "he" the other rock gentle inside me,
this other-

His kiss makes me think of that "ones" lips,

How am I to choose ?,

When each part of the other 's
like choosing of twins,
the same yet so unique,
so different.
I lust for one,
in love with the other,

Love this one &
long for that one, want him yet keep
my distance & play with
someone else,
had him ,
let that 'one" go,

Now I have the both of you & can't choose!
whose who & which will get hurt,
worst thing is

I'm the fool
for being selfish ,

For doing the wrong thing
and letting it carry on this long .

Yet
I can't let go,! No I WONT,

Not even a little,
the way my lover takes me and the way he holds me ,
doing all my man wont do.

Yet the history my man &
I share isn't fair to continue with this love  affair
or is it the end.
and

I'm to weak to say good bye,

I'm too self centered to
let him love another or even let him try,

I can't see him with no one but me ,

I don't want him given what once was mine,
yet

I'm given what was never really his,

My lovers been getting the best of me and never did

I open myself to my man like I've been to my lover,

My lover has me twisted inside to where

I'm no good for any other dude,

YET
that's a LIE

Since my man has me ****** up too,
He has it where

I wont leave & I'm stuck cheating,
'But taking caring of  our home ,
See how

I can blame everyone but me-myself is at fault
and
I'm pointing to anyone but whose to blame?
ha ha hee hee

I got lost & caught in a players game,,

How am I to choose
when I love him & "him" too
& They-Both (Love ME so?)

I'm ****** up &

I'm So TORN-

TRAPPED!!!!!
Always Me Ayeshah

Do you hear me-  when you sleep -  think of me as you eat,
'adore me while you sip coffee or tea?
I think of only the moments '
when we shared funny exciting conversations,
so many miles
so many oceans separate us
laughter fills my household
joking and talking of trips we'd love to take
I can't think I'm
wondering what your doing
if your thinking of me too?
shallow of me I know but oh well
this is me so shallow I guess
I'll be.

do you hear me when you sleep-   think of me as you eat
'adore me while you sip coffee or tea?

I think of only the moments when you jokingly
asked if I'd be yours
laughter fills my home
this household with out a mans touch
or his amusement
but if I give in doesn't
that mean you win?
Win my heart but I'd never make you
compete for it,
Win my trust but you realize
I'd hurt you if you miss used it
Win my soul as long as you grow old with me
But I speak of things yet untold
to fast too soon.
I wait for you to speak
and say hi.
Just hi is fine it'll get me through
the night.
Friends
we are and must stay
so why let you become more
why mess up this
musical dance with a tedious
affair.
Lover's we may yet be but again why take that
Risk!?!

(tell me 1 good reason to destroy Us?)
Always Me Ayeshah

Do You know where
my purple vest
is?
You know -
the one I wear when
I want to conduct
my finest work (?)
I wear with it
my purple
mini skirt
showing off
my fitting legs
and showing off
my big breast
please tell me
dear poets have
you seen it? -
My purple vest(?)
It comes with straps
that connect
to these long sleeves
and ties in the back-
It even has two
belts attached
those  belt tighten
right around my waist
connecting behind me
saddest thing is
I can not fasten
them myself
these two
strong men wearing
white outfits strap them
up for me,
Please friendly poets
please help me
find my purple vest
I have work to do ,
It's tedious work
when  all the
numerous
voices come,
talking deep
down in my head
my head hurts
and I can not
work not
with out my
purple pretty vest
So please
pretty please
with rainbow
sprinkles
Let me know
if you find it
because I
can't write with out
my purple vest-
Not in this -
padded room!
Always Me Ayeshah

What gives you the right to

judge me,

criticism wasn't asked

so why you

open your mouth,

What's your prerequisite

to make assumption's

& judgments-

Constructive criticism

my ***,

My

ADHD

PT-SD

Dyslexia Anxiety

& dealings with you

caused me a break down,

got me

chronically depressed,

You say you only

want the best for me,

Well shut up & let me be!

pill popping just so my E.E.D.

(Emitted explosive disorder)

wont cause me

to become

sentience

with life

new labels

would say

******

if you keep bothering me

I ain't stupid-

So stop talking down to me

Im not illiterate

******* I read

So let me be

No I don't have TS

(tourette syndrome)

I ******* cuss

cuz I wanna

so shut the hell up

I know right from wrong

I'm no psychopath

Then again

I just might be since

I could give a flying ****

about you

weather you live or die

I wouldn't cry.

Your making it harder

for ya self not me just go way

Doc

Do ya got **** Job,

I don't want to talk anymore

My past is where I left it

Behind me

You deal with it

Cuz

I already did & do

For you that

call your selves

wanting to help....

My OCD

(Obsessive-compulsive disorder)

is personal  

So what if I wash

my hands& ***

3 or more times

I'm not stupid
or deaf

I have

Selective Hearing

Nor am I *******.....

that's how

I say hello

with my *******

I told you,

I'm not *******.....


***** I'm Special!

Always Me Ayeshah