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Ayesha Apr 22
I am a monument
Someone was here
Some stone was carved
Some sketches made, remade
Some alterations...

I stand strong now
The creases of my neck
Are placed just right
And they can name
All of my veins

Someday, I will move
And my joints will crack
Then I will rub my eyes,
I will yawn,
And then I will curl up on the floor
And sleep for a long,
Long time
22.04.2025
Ayesha Apr 22
(Nice Dream)
Radiohead croons like a cat
My headphones lie next to my head
But I hear everything
It is saturated now. I am made
Of music and white noise.
On the precipice of sleep,
I possess no arms, legs, past
Just a dull ache in my ear
Where the pillow has pressed
For far too long.
The Tuesday evening
Demands more of me
But I lie careless like a spoon
I let everything pass by
However... wherever
(Nice Dream)
For the first time in years,
I wish that I had not been.
Or had been a little less.
22.04.2025
Ayesha Apr 22
"Let everything happen to you
Beauty and terror.
Just keep going. No feeling is final."
- Rainer Maria Rilke

Quiet fingertips press
I make no disturbance
As I move from foot to foot
Gentle. As if not to startle myself.
Dull-eyed
Drape. Rhythm leaves me.
All pattern, pose, skill.
I have lived - a day -
A night - perhaps.
22.04.2025
Ayesha Mar 18
They will not yearn as crude as I
I will tie you up
My grief, sweet *******, is you
My despair laughs at your victory
There is nothing to spare here
Go and gulp the dry world up
Go or do not
I will feast on nothing
               and I will rejoice
22.02.2025
Ayesha Feb 22
But I will still change the water
I do not care for flowers
I will rearrange them
Of course, I will - you gave them to me
I sit and paint them
And the day blissfully droops to eve
And I think: anger never betrayed me.

But all my criticisms and objections
Fall limp to an empty night
Please, speak.
Provoke me, oppose me. Interrupt even.
My principles hold no power
If they cannot fight you.

I love the simple silhouette
Of your pesky little spirit.
Please, speak.
22/02/2025
Ayesha Feb 14
I waited: the winter
was draped over my feet
my eyes were beginning to pickle -
the lamplight was oil
waiting was the flavor -
slowly... they softened

and then,
some time after midnight
I hear the clatter of stars
as you bring your stories in a basket
the sky spreads itself for you
and you speak so much
everything begins to yawn

I close my eyes to sourness
and feel the months fall around us
bouncing, not quietly,
not loudly, just
enough for company
and I cannot sleep while you speak
I... am waiting.
09/12/2024
To Aayan
  Jan 2 Ayesha
Evan Stephens
Lightning spit across the alloy face
of the dishwasher I was filling a half moment

before a high black throat unfastened
with a sunken bellow that scattered rain

like sodden hair along a sheer pane scalp.
Hell, a storm? On New Year's? What an insult -

because it's been a long year down
for the lonely and eroded angels, the poets

whose orchestras of synapses decay gently
into fresh stanzas. I don't know about you,

but my inbox was a chorus of No, No,
Not You, Never You. It ate me

inside out, but I pressed on in new poems,
both mine and yours - I stumbled blindly

into rooms full of your renewed voices -
reassuring me that silence is not the way.

These are not poems, you all told me -
they are beacons, telegrams, phone calls,

they are pleas, they are screams, they are alive
like the cursive lightning scrawl that paints

the kitchen and bids me stand up straight.
It's been a long year but I came here to say

my mouth is filled with thank you;
strange friends and colleagues, thank you.

To all of you, and your hard work this year.
Your poems were read, and remembered.
Thank you for all of it. It changed me,
for the better, and was appreciated.

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