Time melts like the ice in my jack
Heart on a string abused as target practice
Your words cut deep as the space I buried my love
Knowing the only way someone can find it is by connecting the dots
I LEFT
In your eyes
How does the world still spin with this weight I carry in my soul
Unplugged cords and forgotten poems
Please dance on my sonnet and poke holes in my logic
I'm dying alone
in the cracks from all the nights your hands missed mine
and the song still plays long after we're gone
Who knew of the woman who found gravity as her friend
Leaping head first off my failed dreams
Tears of streams and heartless cheats
Drowning on a pen while covering these eyes in bleach
No sound
No light
No love tonight
Just silence

The perfect place to drink and cry is a piano karaoke bar. Everyone is focused on the singer and will leave you be

Id fall a million times over just to look up and see your face
A carved spot in my heart forever holds you
and every time my sky's turn black, I look inward at your love
The world could be empty besides us, and loneliness would be a distant word
How do you do it Sarah?
How do you cause cities to sink and churches to burn, yet blossom every flower on the planet?
I stopped chasing you years ago and you found me drowning on my own tongue, holding together some distant lie, and all it took was one song to flip my existence upside-down
It's as if every moment with you is sculpted by something higher, something that words are to dull to describe,
something that no one understands, yet everyone is searching for
Maybe tomorrow you will stop loving me
Maybe tomorrow you will show up at my door
Either way, I long to hold you close tonight and tell you everything is going to be alright, even though it may not be true,
even though so much of this life is out of our controle
even though my love may never be enough to make you feel complete
You are my silver lining dear
You always have been
Always will be

I want you to know that this transition is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I keep fighting with the visions I had when we tied the knot but that's all it is, a vision. What I need out of a partner and what you need, we both fell short. Maybe that's why we always used drugs. I just want us both to live long, healthy, and meaningful lives. I believe that is no longer with one another. It doesn't matter about the love inside me for you. The bigger picture displays something more. Something that doesn't involve us being high to cope with our foundations. If I didn't feel life wants us to be apart, I would never push forward. But the way the majority of the lies just surface without any action and the way you were able to go forward with them, paints the answer to the hardest question I've ever dealt with. That we are no longer meant to be. I will always love u amber and care about your well being. I'm just no longer going to be the one who puts you down and you are no longer going to be the one who lets me down. Finish this next week strong. Being sober in a controlled environment is not nearly as difficult as being sober in the free world. Don't forget that. Take everything thing you can from that place and engrave it into your heart and brain. Realize the biggest enemy here was the drugs that robbed us both of more then we will ever know. Beyond cherishing a sober mind, it's all about hating the thing that took the most from you. Let me know if you need anything.