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Arek Sep 2019
i found there is this thing
its kind of like an extra wing

it helps me climb up off the ground
and gives me strength when none is found

then sometimes it feels like a sword
and helps me fight with every word

and on the days when i am weak
it becomes my walking stick

today though it became a pen
and helped me write out that i can

from this endless downward *****
climb once again,
with this thing called hope
Arek Jul 2021
There is a road to happiness
but it's an arduous trip
you must first pass through loneliness
and face dip after dip

Then cross the long flat plains of sadness
and rivers full of tears
Through cities oozing crazy madness
grinding all your gears

but then the trip comes to an end
and finally there'll be smiles
you'll shout out as you on the mountain stand
"this trip's been worth the miles"
Arek Oct 2020
Sometimes the truth is hard to swallow
you can choke and die
so a new diet now I follow
where my every word’s a lie
Arek Sep 2019
my big toe says hello
proudly in charge wiggling
there's four more in a row
right beside him giggling

last in line is pinky
who's on the edges scraping
in my socks hates being stinky
keeps through a hole escaping

I've heard some say they smell
as do some fancy cheeses
but i have walked with them through hell
and on water just like Jesus
Arek Oct 2019
I need a second chance
to come on my door knocking
for Lady Luck to my way glance
with something from her stocking

while Father Christmas also should
be getting me a present
for far too long i have been good
and been to my wife pleasant

and also God with some good deed
should play a major factor
but maybe what i really need
is the whole trifecta
Arek Jul 2020
This guy likes jalapeno bread
with jalapeno cheese
he eats both till his face turns red
screaming on his knees

He likes to work, he likes to play
but mostly it's the latter
He loves it when the skies are grey
because he daydreams better

It's true he isn't into cars
he's not a handy man
and when night comes he counts the stars
while his hand holds a pen

This guy then finally goes to sleep
and all that his dreams see
is you, some say that he's a creep
but this silly guy is me
Arek Oct 2019
gentle as a summer breeze
or a winter storm
she could be any one of these
one day icy next day warm

often switching like the weather
being as soft as lace
then suddenly be dressed in leather
slapping me across the face

every day was tears or laughter
until i found the cause
and the three of us lived happily ever after
since her menopause
Arek Sep 2019
i chose my women based on looks
not their intelligence
most were only one page books
lacking all suspense

so this time i chose wisely
with you i'm on page two
this story's going very nicely
i wonder who kills who
Arek Sep 2019
i like thunderstorms
a show that's most impressive
i like the way one grows and forms
before it gets aggressive

i like how it stands from the crowd
with it's anvil head
the mighty cumulonimbus cloud
is one cloud that's turned bad

i like it as it's getting closer
as the night sky flickers
and then arrives like a bulldozer
that you might need clean knickers
Arek Aug 2020
There's one way to the moon
it's via a rocket ship
you'll get there pretty soon
a most expensive trip

but i might take my time
because i found another
I'll use some words and rhyme
and get there via a ladder
Arek Jul 2020
Why are our oceans salty, why ?
couldn't they be sweet
or made of chocolate oh my oh my
I'd dip more than my feet

Why are our deserts made of sand
and not of flour why ?
world hunger would then surely end
I'd less from hunger cry

Why are our ice caps melting fast
like icing on a cake
we must change our ways, we must
and quicker our cakes bake
Arek Sep 2019
time is a thief
with two very grubby hands
he makes the fun times brief
and shortens our weekends

then weekdays he stands still
especially nine to five
and makes our Mondays feel
that we might not survive

but then he’s on the move again
my watch is to him set
and he won’t stop till God knows when
or when my battery's flat
Arek Oct 2019
time travel is getting cheaper
and they're offering great rates
you can get a return sleeper
to some far flung dates

watch them sign and announce
the American constitution
or go and see a few heads bounce
at the French revolution

watch Neil Armstrong make a step
however great or small
see Columbus check his map
when he makes landfall

but one trip remains overpriced
i guess it's justified
if you want to see Jesus Christ
you still get crucified
Arek May 2022
It all began with weight gain
followed by hair loss
Then shoulder, neck and back pain
making me all night toss

Then sore and bleeding gums
and needing reading glasses
arthritis in my thumbs
while emitting deadly gases

While lately I've been thinking
there is no need to panic
but could it be my ship is sinking
faster than the Titanic
Arek Aug 2022
... and poets will keep on writing
singers keep on singing
countries will continue fighting
with their tails stinging

lovers will continue trying
to find love everlasting
dreamers will continue flying
through their sad days blasting

and haters will continue hating
but let them all continue
while this planet keeps rotating
what matters is what's in you
Arek Aug 2020
In the jungle far away
there was a very angry bee
he scared all that's in his way
and chased the monkeys up the tree

he bit the baboon on the ***
and made the elephant walk upright
he caused the lemurs lips be numb
and then turned the chameleon white

he stopped the playful giant otter
from having all his fun
he got the leopard into a spot of bother
and even got the sloth to run

but his rage was doomed to fail
when the lion he tried to sting
with one slap of his mighty tail
the lion continued to be king
Arek Aug 2020
The most important time is now
let tomorrow wait
don't freak out, don't have a cow
enjoy what's on your plate

and drink what's in your glass
laugh until you're blue
do not fret, don't make a fuss
until today is through

so when tomorrow's finally here
stare it in the face
then tell it loudly without fear
my yesterday you can't replace
Arek Sep 2019
my wife went window shopping
and apparently found a door
through which there was no stopping
from buying half the store

apparently we’re in desperation
for new things for the house
perhaps also a decoration
like shoes, a skirt and blouse

there will never be another sale
such prices I won’t find
apparently i know nothing about retail
and apparently also blind
Arek May 2021
I feel the need
the need for seed
Arek Aug 2020
I love dancing in Bahamas
and in New Orleans
I love dancing in pyjamas
and in your ripped jeans

I love dancing when in Delhi
and when in Hong Kong
I love dancing when I'm smelly
and when i really pong

I love dancing in Kathmandu
and Ole in Spain
I love dancing when skies are blue
and much more in the rain

I love dancing in Greece in Crete
and then when in Rome
I love dancing on the street
and when i am at home

I love dancing when leaving Dover
and on the ferry going to France
so before this song is over
let's make Paris our last dance
Arek Mar 2021
Maybe my life is a test
for whatever happens next
and when I'm finally laid to rest
I will get a text

"Congratulations you have passed
the toughest test of all
with all the knowledge you amassed
while being strong and tall

but now it's time to move on
and be a better human
Congratulations you have won
the chance to be a woman"
Arek Sep 2019
Medical trauma is life changing
look at Jimmy Hendrix
He only started his guitar twanging
after his burst appendix

Similarly too **** Jagger
who was one of the unknowns
and only picked up all his swagger
after removal of his stones

and Madonna's inspiration
came from a top notch surgeon
after her new ***** implantation
she sang Like a ******
Arek Oct 2019
I don’t think I will ever see
a poem as silly about a tree

a tree that is great for spying
at my neighbour by the pool lying

a tree that in the shade feels nice
with trunk that's as smooth as her thighs

a tree that's perfect for a rest
where underneath i touched her breast

and also further more to boot
among its roots I got a root

and in it’s branches there’s still a pair
of her pink laced underwear

this poem made me a little hard
thank God for the big tree in my yard
Arek Jul 2021
True friends are hard to find
so I bought a lie detector
then I could carefully read their heart and mind
to find who's true and who's an actor

but when the findings were compiled
the results were quite a blow
I was so upset but then eventually smiled
and I joined this TV show
Arek Nov 2020
I'm no poet really
all i do is rhyme
writing poems silly
simple, short but I'm

trying to write longer
poems with more heart
so you think I'm stronger
and a bit more smart

but unfortunately I'll
never be that guy
though if i leave you with a smile
this poem's worth a try
Arek Sep 2019
When nothing seems to be going right
... Turn left
Arek Dec 2020
Twenty twenty will be known
as a year of the virus and vaccines
and also one where I have grown
that I can't fit in my jeans
Arek Aug 2020
this year can go to hell
if it were a flower
like a hobo it would smell
who for a whole year didn't shower

this year is completely wrong
there is no way to put it
but if it were this year best song
all day i would mute it

this year if it were a race
and you were on a horse
you would finish in last place
while horse may fare much worse

this year has so much harm done
and hurt all of us plenty
so please hurry twenty twenty one
and *uck off twenty twenty
Arek Jun 2022
Last night I had a chat with God
We used to talk much more
So I guess it was rather odd
that he knocked on my door

We spoke about the usual stuff
with lots of questions why
Some serious one's, some worth a laugh
some even made us cry

Our evening lasted for so long
but before God said good night
She said the answer's in a Bob Marley song
and everything's gonna be alright
Arek Jul 2020
My ocean is no longer blue
nor is it far and wide
and sea birds that above it flew
have disappeared and died

The sun has nowhere left to set
and moon no place to shimmer
there is no wind to steal my hat
and all the stars shine dimmer

The waves don't play for you and me
without our footprints in the sand
and when the sun kisses the sea
there's no touch of your hand

So while my eyes cannot see you
I'm sure of one thing then
my ocean never will be blue
until we meet again
Arek Aug 2020
If there is a heaven
I'm booking the next flight
on a 747
I'll get there overnight

might even get myself a treat
and pay a little more
sitting in a first class seat
a glass of champagne pour

and i might even have another
you need to travel well
flying economy I'd rather
be going straight to hell
Arek Sep 2019
my poetry is simple
and very very silly
it often rhymes with pimple
and sometimes with a *****

its never complicated
but very very light
long words are overrated
and hard to read at night

it can be also curious
and very very weird
sometimes as mysterious
as my girlfriends beard

they say that life is short
that's very very true
so laugh until you start to snort
and be so very you
Arek Jul 2021
Every day will be a gift
even grey and rainy Mondays
because eventually all the clouds will lift
and they'll become sunny Sundays

Every night will be the best
even when the wind is screaming
because eventually it will have a rest
and amongst stars we'll be dreaming

Every moment will feel better
and you will shed your last tear
just when you think your winter will get wetter
suddenly the skies will clear
Arek Aug 2022
The sound of rain makes me sleep better
that I don't need sleeping pills
I even moved to a place that's wetter
high up in the hills

When it rains here it's often pouring
which adds to the charm
and it often has me loudly snoring
right through my alarm

Sometimes the sound is in my dreams
but there's a few I dread
those when I'm surrounded by gushing streams
which make me wet my bed
Arek Sep 2020
My jokes are all light hearted
lighter than a feather
none have hiccups started
or cause leakage from their bladder

No one has rolled on the floor
in stitches and in tears
no one has begged "please no more"
covering their ears

All my jokes end with no laughter
and none i have seen smiling
this is usually followed after
their fingers police dialing
Arek Sep 2019
i bought a brand new car
with four shiny wheels
it's better than my last by far
and nothing in it squeals

it gets me now from A to B
without breaking down
and i can even get to C
or drive it into town

it's radio always plays on cue
and it comes with air
although my old car had air too
with windscreen in repair

but this car starts every time
when i turn the key
i dont get covered in some grime
and doesn't smell like ***

so this friday about five
i'll take my friends and we
are going for the longest drive
as far away as D
Arek Oct 2020
No man is an island
for true love we all search
whether it's in Thailand
or Sunday morning church

Always looking for someone
for that special person
whether it might be a nun
or maybe Elle McPherson

Then magically we get together
might need a prayer, or eight
but tragically love depends in whether
in bikinis she looks great
Arek Jul 2021
Things, the basis of all greed
Wings, is really what you need

Dreams, is actually what matters
Screams, is when they are in tatters

From, always wanting more each day
Come, take my hand let's fly away
Arek May 2020
and by the seventh day God didn't rest
no that's when he got busy
some sauce and cheese, a chicken breast
then salt and pepper, easy

a glass of wine or maybe four
then called to all his mates
to dance their butts off on the floor
at the heavens gates

this Sunday also is my wish
for a taste of paradise
few friends, some wine, a chicken dish
then salt and pepper, nice
Arek Jul 2020
With you i wake up every day
and then sing in the shower
my hair has stopped from turning grey
i don't swear during rush hour

With you my life feels without issues
and happier is my cat
i haven’t bought a box of tissues
since the day we met

With you my armpits are less sweaty
my shirts are wrinkle free
and when it rains it's like confetti
when you are next to me

When I’m with you i now can sleep
and not from nightmares scream
all of the night, without a peep
with you in every dream
Arek Sep 2019
Women and their shoes
It's all they care about
a different pair they need to choose
each time they're going out

Wearing the same pair twice
is a fashion fail
so they will pay whatever price
whenever there's a sale

and with the change of seasons
that's when they all cut loose
It's just one of many reasons
why they need more shoes

and as she's standing there
waiting in the queue
you'll see her buy that perfect pair
in pink and brown and red and blue
Arek Aug 2022
Life is not a competition
just being happy you're alive
but without it we may lack ambition
with no desire and no drive

What we all want is a goal
A reward to quench our thirst
There is something deep inside our soul
that wants us to be first

But sometimes in life all you need
without trying to be fast
is great friends, drinks and a tasty feed
and I'll happily finish last
Arek Sep 2019
you need to have an open mind
said the lobotomist
to life's surprises not be blind
said the optometrist

you never know when sparks might fly
said the electrician
there's more to this than meets the eye
said the old magician

life should be a joyful ride
said the fun park operator
what matters most is what's inside
said the interior decorator

live each day like it's your last
said an optimist
just make sure that it is a blast
said the terrorist

learn from life's patterns and it's trends
said the investment banker
and future will be in your hands
said me (a well known ******)
Arek Sep 2019
it might be a beauty spot
or a melanoma
one day a runny nose you got
the next you're in a coma

ordering that last beer please    
could lead to cirrhosis
or some very rare disease
with a poor prognosis

so if you are fit as a fiddle
don't waste time being pensive
do it all, don't your thumbs twiddle
before you're in intensive
Arek Aug 2020
He was a vegetarian Zorro
who fought with a zucchini
He didn't care much for tomorro
as long as he stayed skinni

All his duels long didn't last
and he was not the winna
Despite his awe inspiring ******
he'd often end up dinna

So then Zorro changed his diet
and grew a bigger tummi
and won each duel till he retired
wielding a salami

— The End —