Anthem

Anthem Sep 2016

perched high upon the rooftop, preaching to the choir

haunted by the echoes
but the flood will bring relief
scaled a tree under the moon
to pluck the purest leaf
you spoke of was and when
enamored by the rapture
curses dripped through swollen lips
indebted to the fracture
a roar rose from the line
a thousand pairs of eyes
denied the gifts of failure
a wind, or seraphs cry
sacrifice to heaven
this present born of love
begging for the rain
persecution of the blood

Anthem Sep 2016

a bad seed hanging from the skeleton tree

it's easier to hold the words
than try to explain them away
i should have told you i'd miss you
before you backed out the driveway
they told us they'd lied
that gods and dreams were one in the same
it helped more than the truth
we couldn't learn to bury blame
cause nothing is for free
and nothing lasts forever
my love will live on
it will find you wherever
i'll always remember
what you never said to me
and wonder how two people so connected
just couldn't let it be

Anthem Sep 2016

it hangs like a weight around my neck

justice exists in the world
it just can't be everywhere
for everyone
all of the time
but stay sweet my dear
keep a smile on your face
ignore the crosswind
deny the warning signs
there is no good and bad
only people doing
the best they can
with that they have
and despite your
reminders of all i lack
you'll neither find in him
so why can't you love me back?
memories of you are
like being stung by a dead bee
buried dreams and visions
and all that you meant to me
hope is a waking nightmare
just like that bee, long dead
i prefer the surrender in sleep
til i awake, your last whispers
running through my head

Anthem Sep 2016

hiding in the rafters, waiting in the wings

the speakers filled with music
surrounded by laughter and drinks
they spoke of was and when
what they wish and hope and think
varied topics came to abuse
and how it was hard to call the cops
but talking to your parents was the least that you could do

that's when he fell silent
with a thousand yard stare
an empty name with an empty smile
because there was no one there
stuck in thoughts he'd lost
buried beneath time
everyone has a crazy uncle
i was just left alone with mine
he noticed that they were worried
a genuine smile graced his lips
with plenty of time to ponder
no need to burden them with this
fleeting glimpses of memories
he's glad they'd never know
sometimes he's left alone
but they never truly go

i'm done with retribution
and delusions of revenge
i pray for restless sleep
i pray the ache to end
eventually it all comes flooding back
his hand upon my knee...
i'll never know what it meant to him
but i'll always know what it cost me

Anthem Sep 2016

where you sleep

it was late, but that's what i'm here for. you called, crying, begging for help. i asked your name, address, and tried to keep you calm. you kept shouting "blue! blue! blue!" over and over and over and over...
i told you it was an accident, but that didn't make it any easier. as i drove home, i could still hear your screams. your life would never be the same again. neither would mine.
i got home and let myself in. the kids were asleep, as they should be. i climb the stairs, my feet weighted. you rest heavy in my mind. as i open the door and look down at her, resting as soundly as an angel, i realize it hurts worst knowing you'll never know this again. i go in and take her in my arms. i hug her. i cry.
how could such unconscious actions lead to so much pain? how could you ever get a restful nights sleep again? fleeting glimpses, your world in your hands. the devil smiles while god laughs at all our plans. you prayed in vain and god ignored your pain.

Anthem Aug 2016

whiskey, peach tea, and trying to forget you ever meant anything to me

you left, fled out west
each night since, i come home to find your light still off
you went to find yourself; i stayed lost
don't get me wrong, i'm glad to chose to go
finding things i could never hope to know
i just never expected...
when i came to get you from the plane
i mean, i knew things would change
but i kind of expected we'd be the same
we're just always moving furniture around
he shook my hand with a smile
like an old friend i hadn't seen in awhile
it didn't make sense, until i saw you
holding tightly to his hand
i realized i was your ride
and he was your man
at baggage claim, it took all i had
to smile and tell you i was glad
that you were finally happy
and i wished you two the best
one phrase kept repeating in my head
"i wish you'd never left! i wish you'd never left! i wish you'd never left!"

Anthem Aug 2016

don't blame the seeds for being planted in the ground

its near midnight on the 23rd (or is it the 24th?) when i find myself lost in the cornfield. there's a full moon staring down at me. every direction looks the same. my clothes are *****. i'm carrying a shovel. i'm sweating. every inch of my body itches terribly. i have one clear, perfect moment, before i find myself overcome by confusion and panic. suddenly, i'm running. the leaves that hang from the stalks are tearing at my face, my arms, my clothes. after a minute, i stop. i'm counting 1,2,3,4... i'm remembering how to breathe. why am i so afraid? it dawns on me that i have my phone, i can use its GPS to find a way out of here. hooray for google maps. i pull it from my pocket. as i'm holding it, the glow from the screen illuminates my hands and i see them, really see them, for the very first time. they're covered in red. i scream. it's more apparent than it's ever been. if i can't learn to control these feelings, they will destroy me. i hope it's not too late.