9-1-1, What is your emergency?
I seemed to have lost my sense of urgency
I froze
Which is funny, because undoubtedly
You used to be the one cold as ice
I sat there
My body solidified above the concrete
But my faults began spilling out from my very being
Becoming a temporary repair for the fault lines along the road
9-1-1, What is your emergency?
The operator mimicked her opening line
With remarkable consistency
But my ears are not the problem here
I've always been a good listener
You told me that every now and then
And although I interpreted her question rationally
It was your final farewell that still had me perplexed
My breathe walked with you as you departed
Mostly due to your uncanny way with words
You used your utterances as building blocks
Crafting such a painful path with your magnificent mouth
Your condolences were candy-coated consolation prizes
Awarding my sincerity halfheartedly
And this heartbreak is my podium now
So while I lean on it willingly
Raising fate above my head as my only trophy
Know that I'm struggling with my acceptance speech
I've always had trouble wording my verbage
And expressing my sensations efficiently
So bear with me while I materialize this message

9-1-1, What is your emergency?*
Dispatch sounds distressed at this point
And I'm desperate for a proper resolution
So I try to recollect my mental resources
And muster up the ability to announce my anecdote properly
In order to explain my crisis precisely
And what comes next is nothing
My thoughts hovered around my mouth
But lacked any sort of volume
Thus remaining a mystery to the operator
And typically I turned to you in these situations
When my words became my worst nightmares
You see, you always knew what to say
You always responded with world class precision
And I need an expert's advice every now and then
But since you fled the scene
Fearing the certainty of an imaginary apology
I struggled with summing up my situation
I've been attacked, please help me
Finally I mustered up the energy to form
Sounds similar enough to that phrase
Close enough so this woman could send me
Someone with the proper credentials and
Experience for such misconstrued circumstances
The detectives arrived and investigated the scene
Doing their due diligence while I laid motionless on the pavement
They looked for clues
Studied for anything that could lead them to you
But I guess my words weren't grounded in truth
And although I knew only one suspect remained at-large
They carried on with no substantial leads or possible breakthroughs
The only arrest that occurred
Was the false imprisonment of my heart in yours
There was no bail set and parole will likely be denied
What a deadly criminal at large

I could lay here and wonder a million times over
What it is that keeps you smiling and sober
But nothing in the world could change what
Your eyes have seen and ears have heard

I could lay here and listen for a thousand whispers long since lost in space
But like the wavelengths of the words never said; I cannot hear a single trace.
I know what you feel hurts you to endure- so
I will run to cease the pain for you.

I could lay here and hurriedly paddle down the river of tears flowing from your eyes
Like waterfalls every drop is a reenactment of the rapids reflected in mountain skies
Falling as fast as they are rushed out of broken wishing wells straight from your heart
I cannot tell you how much I want to save you from the pain tearing you apart

Let me heal the wounds you keep mercilessly opening up
I want to stop the blood from rushing out of your soul
I want to keep you safe-I want you to heal-I want you to be okay
Stay with me, please- stay with me, I know I can help you if you'd just let me

Let your walls break down and open the curtains of your barrier
Let me in
Let me in
Let me in.

**Let me save you.

I walk this lonely road
But it the only one I've ever  known
I try to hide the pain behind a smoke
I'll light this cigaret
and hide all my worries behind it
I walk this road alone by choice
I hide behind my smokes and my ****
I hide behind the things you wouldn't expect of me
I'll walk this road alone it's my choice
This way I don't get hurt
I'll just keep walking
And making the choices you wouldn't expect

Breathe in the morning glow,
breathe out your inner flow,
feel each sacred-breath,
trickling throughout
your inner core.

O how I imagine you,
intertwining your soul
with mine.
Your fine-eyes
lost, floating
in another dimension
accentuated
by the sweet music
of our love sounds.

Pants & sighs,
liquids flowing
between our thighs,
feeding the hottest
fires of our hearts,
hidden desires no more,
when we think like this,
us,
kissing our dreams.

alcohol drowns your sadness
cigarettes cloud your thoughts
cutting enables your demons to seep from beneath your skin
drugs blur your consciousness

there are all these remedies
for sadness
but unfortunately
none of them are permanent

however
if you continue to overdose
and paint fresh lines across your skin
you might just end up dead