What happened to us.
One day you stopped trying to open my head and my chest to pick at my secret's
One day my secret's just became mine again
No longer something we shared between the sheets in hushed whispers when the world was long past asleep

I taste pennies on your lips and I swear nothing has ever been sweeter

It'd be easier if I could distance myself
I know you don't want this
Want me
Yet every time you're in my bed you look at me in this secret way that makes me feel like you see me
And it chips at a piece of me
Knowing this is something real and sweet and tender and someone crushed your trust enough that you can't bare to face another risk

I like your bones.
I like that steady foundation still being built and ever changing inside of you that makes you a person with ideas and thoughts and feelings and morals unshakable by a gentle breeze or a hard shove
I like watching you unfold
I like watching the pieces fit together and grow and change and soften
I like the tender spots that hurt and that steel spine that keeps the soft inside and protected

There's been a hole in my heart for years now
You left me because you couldn't handle the world and that's okay
But my heart will forever ache with what you used to make me feel and I so badly wish I could have said something to make you stay
I hope wherever you went was better than the life you knew
I will miss you always

You're scared to look at me because I'm the part of yourself you lock in a box and leave to collect dust
I'm the reflection you're terrified to face