You are everything and everywhere, there is no escape

Pleasure in a world without pain will drive a man insane, just as darkness in a place with no light will still seem kind of bright

I've been running for years
but never left my home
Wasting days away watching the world go by
Whenever I try to take part I break down and cry
All the people I want to know are always out of reach
And if they ever come close at all my words choke my throat
With a violent hack I spit up all I have caught in my brain
Then they disappear and we will never ever speak again
So I keep my heart inside, I keep my mouth from exposing
A fear that oft resides, all the doors and windows are closing
No places left to turn, what will I become
My chest it starts to burn, i think my days are done

Someday that heart of yours is going to get you killed, and the one you die for won't stay to foot the bill

This latest fashion is becoming quite the passion
Nights kept awake by alcohols bitter taste
So say cheers to the future and all that you'll do
And say a prayer for the hopes that you're still holding on to
The night is young and so are you
You have all your life to make dreams come true

The sirens are singing such violent songs, signaling that once again I have done wrong. My mind has been breached, my shores are not calm, but what can I do to silence their calls? They speak in poetry, metaphors for the harm that I've caused, and I can't understand their verse. My ears hear their words but my thoughts refuse to follow along. My actions show that I have not learned a single **** truth from the last time that I was burned, and all I can think is how good it would feel, to be fire again and know that I am real. I can create but I cannot touch the realities, yet when it comes to destruction I can ruin with comfort and ease, I **** every piece of the world that I see

You are my favorite star, but the sad thing is you no longer burn, and I'm just praising the last of your rays as they're hurtling towards earth. Decimated by your own design, it will not be seen that you were gone until it is far beyond my own moment to shine. I will waste my days looking to the sky, letting my eyes be filled with hope from a light whose source has already been lost to time.

Sometimes I wonder where we each would be, if you didn't decide you had to go, or if instead I was the one who chose to leave

My heart swings from the chandelier of your hope and dreams
Wildly swaying from the support of your cross beam
But I don't know if you can hold my weight
I might crash into your table, land face first on your plate
If you want I'll clean up, take you on a second date
But you're a fool full of food if you think I'm gonna change

This sin refuses to part from my skin
I wear it well
It wears me thin

Eat ****
*******
I don't care what you do
*******
Go die
I hope you commit suicide

I let myself get ****** in so swiftly
Just so I can try to be part of someone else's whole, because there's too much empty space in my own to ever complete my soul

There is a weight
Tied tight around my throat
Pulling me deeper every moment
And as I sink further into the abyss, I find I no longer need to breathe
And thought it's too dark for my eyes to find light to latch onto, I can see exactly where this weight is taking me
Into the wide open empty place that nobody dares to visit
Into myself, and all the darkness I contain
I will be carried to the bottom
And never return

Never fall prey to the promises of government or economy
They'll make you pay for the air you inhale, and if you don't give it up they'll throw you in jail
Nobody should own what was here before our race, but some day soon they'll be selling us outer space

Please don't try to stop me
I have to get away
Even though I like it here
I simply cannot stay
Even though I like you near
I don't want to leave
But I can't shake this fear
Its worse than you'd believe
I wish you could save me, my dear
But don't, let me disappear

Somehow I keep
Letting you slip
Through my fingers
And under my nose.
Then when you're gone
I don't feel a thing
But your memory lingers,
Like the smoke in the air
That I breathe in my sleep,
I Inhale as much of you
As my lungs can keep,
Until I am thoroughly
And completely choked.
The house is on fire,
But I'll never leave this roast.
I'm just dreaming of you,
As I sleep alone
Inside my burning home

The cauldrons are churning up in the abandoned attic
The televisions are all promoting a state of perpetual static
The streets are shrouds of smoke filled with folks you've seen
The world itself is a joke when you only feel safe in your dreams

If only you knew
How you consumed
How i tried to resist
Strength of your wrists
Your salt in my wounds
I took your medicine
You prescribed doom
I sat alone in your room
Speaking to your ghost
And your spirit loomed
Over a darkened room
I saw you and your skin
Paying the price for sins
I'll forgive you for them
We can go back to when
Everything was clean
Smartly running devine
Every gear spun on time
All cogs were aligned
I just want to restore
The love that i swore
Forever and ever more

I couldn't hear what you were saying
It seems that my attention is fading
The on coming lights have got me distracted
Please let that last thought be retracted
I don't want you to think that I had this speech practiced
I just wanted to say that I think we went to far
We drove ourselves crazy from the backseat of this car
Now we find ourselves stranded and out of gas
If only we remembered the mistakes we made in the past
Maybe we could have saved ourselves enough to make this trip last

This heart is beating and it stops all the time
Any time I think of you I hit the flatline
But maybe someone else can restart the rhythm
Because I can't keep beating for you if you won't even listen

For the longest time I kept my head above the waves and my feet stuck in the sand, but now your sea levels are rising, swallowing every place that I could try to hide, and I don't think I have it in me to keep swimming through your tide. I'm not ready to sink beneath this, but I no longer have a choice, so before my lungs fill with water, I need you to hear my voice.

There was nothing I wanted more, than to simply rest on the crest of your shore. All I needed was to lay upon your sandy space, and feel your spray splash onto my face. But now that your tide has taken my beach, washed over all that I used to see, there's no place I can go to be free. All I can do is let your current carry me in its hands, because I'd rather drown beneath your ocean than live upon dry land

It might be dumb of me to ever believe that there could be one out there meant for me, because when it comes to she I can never seem to find one who enjoys seeing me the way that I know how to be

A thousand times I'd said I'd try
A thousand times I simply lied

Want me
So I can want you
I hope you want me
So I won't feel used
Do not drop me
If you do I will break
But if you don't want me
Then you better drop me
I'd rather be lost and broken again
Than only held lightly by you my friend
And if you happen to let me go
Let me say this so I'll know that you know
I won't be there when you turn around
I'll leave my shell shattered on the ground
I have already seen the light of day
I've been dropped many times before today
If you want
Let me fall
But if you want
Want me too
Hold me tight
Don't let me break

I try to be something
Most often I'm not
I used to be someone
Who I am forgot
I can be nothing
It's still more than I've got
I think I'm no one
Don't ever tell me I'm not
The only reason I've made it at all
I've faked my way through every fall
I pretended that I could hold a presence
Every action and every word
Used to keep hold of my world
Abandon the truth
Forget the past
There is no proof
Just make this last

Inside my chest rests a hole
Black and bottomless, it goes straight to my center
Above it hangs a sign that reads: danger, do not enter
If you shine a light and try to see the floor, you'll find yourself staring into a vacant core
Absorbing all white
Spitting out just dark

This instability is killing me
These thoughts I can't control
Eroded by emotions, I can't get out
All the words choking my throat

I'm not satisfied by my passion
I'm not content with my efforts
Because still, I can't accomplish anything
Except for making sure you hurt

I'm reaching for a reaction
I'm clawing for a cause
All in all, I guess it's time to end this
There will be no final applause
There will be no curtain calls

She is the earth, the moon, the planets, and the stars
And when I sit alone with her side by side in my car
I can feel for once that heaven isn't very far

I can feel myself slipping away, because theres not much holding me back, these days, its so hard trying to hold myself together, because even if i could do it from now until forever, i dont think, i should, know that its not so bad, but i could never really get the hang of acting like that, so i say so long, to this part, of my heart

No matter what I try to do, it never seems good enough for you. One wrong move and you'll turn from gold to blue, and you'll leave me feeling angry, bitter, confused, and so very ******* used

You're the queen of the earth
Pristine person of dirt
I am the king of the sea
Suppose I have thoughts that are salty

I don't think any of us are ever truly ourselves unless we are alone. There will always be parts of ourselves we want to hide from the eyes of those we respect.

Every night when you lay your head down to rest, do you think about the life you've lived, do you have regrets? Is your mind exhausted by all the lies that your tirelessly tell yourself, like that one about how you don't believe you'll die without knowing your love was felt? Do you dream about the girl you loved that you let get away, the one who wanted nothing but you yet still you wouldn't let her stay?  And when you wake up do you find you aren't in the place you were before, but you tossed and turned yourself into a familiar spot on the floor?

Some will find this to be a surprise
Every morning a new sun will rise
With this gift of a new day
We must try not to say
Nothing is worth dying for
Sacrifice will leave you with less than before
But letting evil succede will leave you alone at the door
If you load the gun or tighten the noose
You're the only one with nothing to lose

His way
His friends
His family

His love
His life
His sanity

He's losing it

His peace
His freedom
His mind

His joy
His dreams
His time

He's losing it

All these thoughts in my mind could start a forest fire
Burn down your home with a book of matches on your eighteenth birthday
Oh well, **** me, right
I was just trying to light the cake
Oh yeah, well **** me, twice
You said we needed water, but you had to wait because I could only find ice
That's what you get for living up north
Not unlike that time you read the wrong book for your book report
Teacher gave you an F, but thanked you for trying

How quickly you forgot all the things you said, and I misstepped as well but I had you causing a wreck inside my head. Anytime I'd try to write all my ink would come out red, on a thousand pages my feelings for you were bled, and it hit me so hard because I hung on your every word, then hung myself from the rafters and watched my life swing over the disaster. Now you've come back blaming me for things that you misheard, you always had me so misunderstood. Forget you, I know that I should, but when the only person that you even care about says they're leaving for good, what did you think I would do, feel sorry for you? Because I'm such an ******* to have driven you to disperse, you knew it was me but you didn't know my verse, and now since you've been gone things have only gotten worse. Every night I've been stuck awake, trying to put a pin on my mistake, hiding away in my lonely place, feeling like I'm gonna explode, because no matter how high I'd get I still could not forget your face. I felt like I was in space, like I removed myself from planet earth without a trace, but deep down I know I can't escape this place

The sun is shining over all I see
There's a pleasant feeling falling over me
And though my mind still finds trouble soon I'll be set free
Set a course for the clouds amongst the cosmic sea
I'll find myself in a place of wonder atop the highest of trees
Nothing but space and time will be there to keep a hold of me

I'll dissolve my heart in alcohol
Cloud my mind and eyes in smoke and doubt
Piece by piece, I'll fall to peace
From madness grows the seed of freedom

We remained cautious when it all started off
We hid our intentions deep down in our hearts
We drew closer with each passing day and began to see the warning signs fade away
But our old terrors were just waiting up ahead around the bend
Their dogs caught us not a hundred yards away from where we jumped the fence
They caught us red handed and said they'd never let us get away from them like that again

Fake it, fake it, fake it
Pretend it doesn't hurt
Just let her think you're dead
Let her cover you with dirt
Fake it, fake it, fake it
Don't let that pain get through
Lay your head upon her feet
Lie to yourself like you always do
Fake it, fake it, fake it
Don't get yourself too close
And know my friend that if you do
You'll be left with just her ghost

Tonight I appear bigger through the false perspective of my broken mirror.

I find my eyes but they cannot see the space inbetween the sky and the sea directly ahead staring back at me, and as my eyes try to scour through the night for the ledge thats out of sight, my legs begin to push while the wind gives me a shove, then suddenly I'm  flying at full speed over the ocean towards the edge just up ahead.

Should I not discover a way to get myself down and back onto solid ground, I'll fly off the horizon into the void, consumed by the unknown. But I have gone too far, and should I gain my mind again, I'll slip and fall into the water beneath my feet, and there alone I will drown.

Cuz if she won't
I'll have to go
Wander off far
Away from our home

Around the world
In search a girl
Who's worth more than
My girl at home

Find another
Woman like her
Who wants to be
My entire world

Nobody's perfect, but I am so much less than the rest

Walking through a wormhole, I feel my mind go flat.
*I've entered your presence

I want to know where feelings go when they die
If they cease to exist, or if they were never more real than you or I
I wonder if those feelings don't dissipate at all, but fade and lie in wait for another day
Lying dormant, trampled like a doormat
All other emotions have right of way
Everything trying to escape
All I want is to stay
Just for once I want to feel
I want to know that its real
If I could just feel once more
To know if love can be reborn

I saw the wild cats playing in the street
They see me
They eat meat
I once tried to approach them, to see what they could teach
The one I spoke to told me, its best if you stay out of our reach
If you try to catch them, they'll always get away
You cannot control them, but if you're silent they might stay
You may try to tempt them, with a mouse or a fish
But should you ever feed one, be sure it doesn't bite your wrist

The mind of a writer is like the body of a prize fighter. It always ends up getting beat around, and every once in a while it gets knocked down, yet every time it finds its way back to its feet, because nothing but death can make it accept defeat