It's hard for me to start conversation
I'm usually too busy thinking about things I shouldn't say
Or utterly consumed by this sense of dissociation
Yeah, it's been pretty tough talking to anyone about anything these days

You're only a tiny voice in the back of my head, but still you sing louder than anything I've ever said. I don't mean to be so distant, and I never intended to show you resistance. It's just that I don't know how to sleep with you next to me, I never make the right move, I always **** up the timing of everything. I need to know that there's a place inside you, a space where I can hide when I need to. And I hope that you don't need this letter to remind you, I'm only looking forward, I don't care what lies behind you.

Run for your life like you're being chased by Godzilla
Fear for your fate at the hands of something familiar
It seems to be growing
It's approach won't be slowing
Call up the castle and beg for a place to hide
Call up the kettle and put yourself safely inside
Boil alive to save yourself from what waits outside of your mind

For a flower I'd carry extra water wherever I go
For a flower I'd make sure the sun always showed
For a flower I'd take a thousand bee stings
Because for a flower, this girl downtown will sing
With a voice fluid as rivers
With a voice hot as stars
With a voice smooth as honey
For a price the girl with this voice will sing, and the payment of one flower to her is plenty

Take a breath
push it out
Clear your mind
escape from doubt

Now take a seat
spin the spoke
Pull the smoke
Let your life and mind meet

A rush of sight, colors rapid and bright
The sound of screaming static
And explosions up in your attic
*now's the time for you to breakthrough
you're falling away from the world that you knew
into the void of your entire existence
free from the weight of universal resistance

What do you see in the confines of that frame
Do you see a girl broken like the pane
She sees only the pieces molded by the pain
She looks into the glass and sees only the cracks
But what she fails to observe is the man at her back
She cannot sense that he loves despite what she lacks
Because as shattered as she feels he knows she is whole
And all that he wants is to show her he mirrors her soul
Because they are the same, separated only by the lines life has made

You're hungry but you don't want to eat
You're tired but you don't want to sleep
You're blinded but you don't want to see
You're dying but you don't want to breathe

Awesome,
Breaking,
Crashing,
Deafening,
Engulfing,
Flood,
Gallopi­ng Horses,
Insanely Jettisoning,
Killer Landslide,
Maniacally Nebulous Outpourings,
Perceptively Quizzical Rhetoric,
Slumbering Truth Under Veils,
Willfully Xenomorphic Yokeless Zen

If I'm a nail and God holds the hammer, he must keep hitting his hand every time he goes to strike me down, because im just standing here like "Am I in yet?"

If I could just let go of everything, I would be comfortable, here in my hole.

What is it you are looking for
You're always chasing your love out the door
And when you feel lonelier than before
You blame the world as you curl up on the floor
What is the answer you hope to find
You're always running circles through your mind
And when you learn there is nothing to find
You hold onto what you can't leave behind
Where is the motivation you seek
You're always claiming that you are too weak
And when you're quiet all you want to do is speak
But you just paint your face with colors hopeless and bleak
What is it you are looking for
You're always sitting on the ground looking quite bored
And always telling me that there must be something more
You just can't help but look up when you're always on the floor

You went into the restaurant and asked for a seat with strangers, and a plate of nothing but bubble gum
You weren't there because you were hungry, but because you were lonely and tired of biting your tongue

Full moon shining on the rippling seas surface
Controlling the tides
Serving its purpose
With a force measurable by complicated equations and tactful calculations
Used to predict its every push and pull along the shores of all earth's nations
A light hanging in the atmosphere
Instilling into the minds of many throughout history hope and fear
Shining from the unseen glow of yesterday's sun
Placed so carefully distant as to linger in gravity's grip
Not too far or to close so it will never slip

Hope you had a splendid  trip into the new year.
I know I did.
But still I wish you'd have been here.

I haven't slept with the voices in some time, but soon they will slip out of their hive to infect the sanctity of my mind, and by the time that they arrive it will be too late for me to find a way to to save my life from the clutches of their bind.

I don't always mean what I feel inside, but sometimes these feelings are too big to hide

If I was a house would you be the key to my door
If I was a rug would you lay me on your floor
If you were a boat I'd let you sail on me
If you were a bird I'd let you fly through me
All these things I wonder to myself
If I was yours would you love me like no one else

If I was a tree would you rest in my shade
If I was a stain would you let me fade
If you were a leaf I'd never let you fall
If you were a painting I'd hang you on my wall
All these things I ponder to myself
If I was yours would you love me like no one else

If I was a lake would you swim in me
If I was a cloud would you look at me
If you were a queen I would be your king
If you were a song you'd be he only one I sing
All these things I question to myself
If you were mine I'd love you like no one else

I don't love you anymore
I'm sorry that it has to end this way
But I just cant put up with the pain
Of watching you long for a love that isn't mine
Please believe me, for so many nights I cried
Wishing that I could have had you by my side
But I've made up my mind, and I'm going to find
A way to move on from what i never wanted to leave behind

Eat ****
*******
I don't care what you do
*******
Go die
I hope you commit suicide

what i once thought
i thought i knew
nothing could change how i felt about you
i never believed what i saw
but now my eyes have been bled raw
and i see you for all you really are
cant forgive, a stupid mistake
you say you loved, but i say it was faked
if those feelings were so true
then i wouldn't be here, angry at you
an act of compassion, i could never get
every time i slipped, you made me regret it
another fault, another straw in the stack
and finally we've broken the young camel's back

Enslavement of the common man
Working and toiling all the way to his grave
Always counting what he has
Every penny must be saved

Every night when you lay your head down to rest, do you think about the life you've lived, do you have regrets? Is your mind exhausted by all the lies that your tirelessly tell yourself, like that one about how you don't believe you'll die without knowing your love was felt? Do you dream about the girl you loved that you let get away, the one who wanted nothing but you yet still you wouldn't let her stay?  And when you wake up do you find you aren't in the place you were before, but you tossed and turned yourself into a familiar spot on the floor?

Want me
So I can want you
I hope you want me
So I won't feel used
Do not drop me
If you do I will break
But if you don't want me
Then you better drop me
I'd rather be lost and broken again
Than only held lightly by you my friend
And if you happen to let me go
Let me say this so I'll know that you know
I won't be there when you turn around
I'll leave my shell shattered on the ground
I have already seen the light of day
I've been dropped many times before today
If you want
Let me fall
But if you want
Want me too
Hold me tight
Don't let me break

These cold nights never seem to end
Alcohol's warmth is my only feeling
I wake up alone and look for a friend
This frozen heart has reached its end
Where once I knew I could always find
There is no shelter for this empty mind
Now it is black, and covered in snow
Cold and rejected, I walk home alone

Customers come
Our concern in feigned
Customers leave
Of them we complain
News is on the televisions in our burrito shop
So customers can see reports of our competitors e. Coli outbreak
Someone asks if our steak can be cooked less
The answer is no
They leave without ordering
*Come again

We are still
Motionless in black
If we turn to the light
There is no turning back
We are broken
Crushed by stone
But if we stand by each other
We won't be so alone
Screaming out
Crazed and wild
Shout towards the sky
Find freedom child
Set yourself free
No longer will you haunt me
I have walked away
Been gone since yesterday
With the last of our strength
We've been holding inside
We told the world
We're not ready to die

His way
His friends
His family

His love
His life
His sanity

He's losing it

His peace
His freedom
His mind

His joy
His dreams
His time

He's losing it

Drowning is easy when I'm swimming in you, and I could come up for air but I don't think I want to. Because you see, you are the sea where everything floats along like a dream, and if you never let me be dry again, that'd be fine with me.

It feels like you're somewhere you've never been,  yet you find yourself flooded with memories of a time way back when
A place where you once felt at peace and where you fell in love with life,  before the tangle of life got you caught up in the strife
A simple, yet pleasant melody
A hand connecting you to me
I miss this place where I've never set foot
I'd take this memory over life if I could

There was a time when our love could breathe and it all felt good that we have long since abandoned, and now as I watch what little that remains be choked by smoke and swallowed by flames in the back seat of my broke down sedan, all I can think of as I smile and laugh is that I'll never get to see any of it again

A passing butterfly had caught my glance
I watched it float so free and weightless
I caught the bug and made it my own
I picked out the jar that it would now call home
Once inside it started to change
No longer did it hover with its beauty and grace
It just sat and waited to be free from this place
So I set it free because it should never have been mine
But just as it turned to look at me one last time
That beauty burst into a magnificent flame
The fire that lives inside me is the culprit to blame

What's more important: who you spend your time with, or what you spend your time doing?  Is it better to do the wrong thing with the right people, or to do the right thing with the wrong people?

Poets speak in spills of sarcasm and satire
Soul searing and smooth saying sentences salvaged from their sins
Stop starting signs and sigh soaked sincerities seep from their seething seams
Soap suds sit in their mouths while supplying
supplementary information seemingly from a somber soul
sought after by so few socialites
Poets speak solely from the soul, as no other place would suit their words a safer home

Go ****** your eyes over a photograph, it won't be enough to bring her back
Push your fingers through her heart, it won't be enough to make it restart
Tear your teeth into her cold hand, it wont be enough to make her feed you again

There are a limitless number of ways to escape when you're walking towards oncoming cars on a busy interstate

As I watch the smoke hang in the moist morning air
I search myself but can't find a reason to care
Everything that has been plaguing me to the point of depression
It has all faded away, gone into a temporary recession
I'm not sure if this feeling will last, hopefully my mind doesn't revert to the past
Enticing bliss filling my veins, flushing out all of the poisonous pains
This is the feeling I seek, I no longer feel weak
The captive voice is beginning to speak, voicing itself with words that aren't so meek
Soon this troubled son will be free, a shining symbol for all who are lost to see
This moment now is my chance to escape, I'm ready to retake my natural shape
The endless days of sadness will be put behind me, I've been set free from the chains that had once bound me
I never thought this day would come
I thought it would only be found at the end of a gun
I open the curtain to let in the light
Finally now I have won the fight

You are not the needle sticking out of my arm as I nod off silently
You are not the pipe lying in my lap as my body starts shaking violently
You are not the pill case resting by my side as I fade away on the floor quietly
You are not the bottle in my hand as I slam my car into a van filled with a family

You are the substance shooting through my veins, relieving me of all my pain
You are the smoke soaking my lungs, bringing me to a mystic plane
You are the powdered capsules floating in my stomach, promising to take me far away
You are the alcohol mixed into my blood, granting me courage to not care for this place

I don't know where I am, but I know the steps I took to reach this plane, a few wrong turns and a leap of lacking faith

I never doubted your heart, just your commitment to the part
Through thick and thin, you just couldn't let me in
In sickness and in health, I'm feeling better by myself
Through the good times and the bad, you could never keep up with the passion that I had
For times of wealth and times of need, my hungry heart you could never feed
And for better or for worse, I'm happy now to be free of your curse

I often need to be reminded of the things I've said and how they contradict the currently carried thoughts in my head. I need to be assured that my worth will be preserved and that i shouldn't believe the things I thought I've heard.

Explosive silence
Bottled violence
A vile combination
A sizable complication
Thoughts unheard from a heart not conferred
Your actions will confine you if you let history define you

We remained cautious when it all started off
We hid our intentions deep down in our hearts
We drew closer with each passing day and began to see the warning signs fade away
But our old terrors were just waiting up ahead around the bend
Their dogs caught us not a hundred yards away from where we jumped the fence
They caught us red handed and said they'd never let us get away from them like that again

At first I favored the other reptiles, with their damp, rigid bodies
They were easy to get along with, and I don't think they noticed I'd been imitating them
But I grew tired of lounging in swamps and settling for insects at every meal
I wanted to eat meat like the true mighty beasts

You want it
But have no need
You crave it
But you'd rarely feed
Once you're inside
You'll want right out
Then back again
I have no doubt
This game here
Is one I own
No one else
Sits on my throne
I claim calamities
And assume atrocities
All while the quiet
Voice inside hides

I only say I don't know because I don't want you to know.

On my own here we go
Im exhausted and im confused
Im real used to getting used
My heart beats fast
I cant sit still
I forgot to take my pills
Oh my god here we go
Dissociation is my home
Disconnected from my bones
I used to love getting ******
My mind is killed
By my whims and wills
All alone take me home

Emotional rollercoaster
Corn dogs of hope
Bumper car regrets
Tilt a whirl responsibilities
Twister of sensation
***** on her dress
Rejection of admission
Too short of esteem
Broken snow cone machine